Humans tend to be rule based. Rules are kind of like spirits that guide our decisions and our lives. Our brain gets upset when it realize we might have been allowing an ignorant spirit to guide our life. It messes with our trust, and messed up trust can shatter our sense of reality. It's so much easier for our ego to exclusively blame others for our trust issues than acknowledge we might be weak in assessing what to trust. I have to have forgiveness in my heart to forgive myself and others, but it's instinctually, temporarily, so much easier to blame others for our own insecurities and weaknesses! Moving forward it might also help for her to not take lessons so personally. Harder to process things in a calm manner or forgive if we take everything so personally.

Look at the last paragraph, and we can see she even admitted she is mad at herself. She's furious at herself for "wasting 8 months on someone who doesn't believe women are entitled to have sex," but her hate and ignorance spills over to him, putting words in his mouth. Ain't that some silly shit she says there? She needs to check her privilege, no? "Women are entitled to sex." LOL nobody's entitled to sex or a relationship in our society, sweaty. Men aren't even entitled to their money or see their kids full time when a woman want to leave a relationship for whatever reason, but that's a whole other can of worms.

She's heated about her circumstances. She can't change the past, and she's mad that she can't use the power of her sisterhood and her media to come save the day. They were the ones who assured her what she was doing was absolutely, totally fine, so where are they now to assure her that the consequences she is facing are absolutely not her fault?

I've been reading DatingOver30 (DOT) recently, and even they have common lessons that would criticize her approach dating this last man. She was deceitful, didn't address potential compatability issues early on, and made assumptions.

For one, holding back potentially relationship-breaking things for anything other than a few dates is a no-no. It's manipulative to keep potential deal breakers hidden until you know you have roped in the person emotionally. She's also mad at having to address an incompatability, but it's a good thing to find incompatabilities early on! She should have brought up potential deal breakers really early on, because as shown by her reaction, to not do so is a waste of everyone's time. See how she also made assumptions about his views on a potential deal breaker? Bad approach! As I mentioned, it's good to address incompatabilities early on. That necessitates slowing down on the assumptions, and communicating more. Communicate about everything: boundaries, goals, lifestyle, which topics you disagree on (and whether or not that would be a deal breaker). It's fun to make assumptions and project our fantasy onto someone, but that's not conducive to a long term relationship and it wastes everyone's time.

TLDR: She needs to...

1) ...forgive herself for making decisions she thought would have 0 repercussions in her life, and not take lessons so personally. 2)...check that privilege. Nobody is entitled to an intimate relationship of any sort. 3)...find other influences in life. 4)...practice better dating approaches: don't be deceitful about potential deal-breakers, address compatibility issues early on, communicate rather than assume, and do all of these things so you don't waste everyone's time.

Now I'm going to reflect on this, lest I forget these good lessons too.