A single post on r/LGBT, got me banned. Never even been there before.

Can you give me a rundown on your thoughts? Everything is deleted.

In the case of what I think this is, I'll take a stab.

I'm going to guess you're experiencing just a tiny bit of self loathing. I did too. For the longest time I said things like "I hate the gay community."

I was your typical Uncle Milo. Over the last five-ish years I've changed. I'm still not in line with the average gay political position (although as gay becomes mainstream, that has changed gradually), but I do go to Pride now. And you know what? It's kind of fun. I generally don't go to gay bars unless I'm super thirsty for some sex and need it ASAP just because I hate loud noise and flashing lights.

I do not feel trapped by "the community". Simply because I do not have to be a part of any community I don't want to be a part of. It's also important to note that the online gay community is very different from the real life community. Yes, the online community is dominated by SJWs, but the real life community really isn't. It has a somewhat liberal tilt, but it's nothing you've not seen before and dissent is generally welcome.

The gay community as a phenomenon is not going to exist much longer. It existed because gays were oppressed and had to form a subculture. As gays are less and less oppressed, we've been seeing that subculture die. Gay guys don't live almost exclusively in gayborhoods anymore. So-called gayborhoods are now largely rich, white, straight hipsters. Gays just live normal lives in the suburbs and cities now.

I would try and sit down and analyze whether your feelings of being trapped "by the community" are from a part of you that wants YOU to be something separate, maybe something better, than "the rest of them". If your upbringing led you to believe that homosexuality is wrong/sinful/gross/whatever having a way to say "Well, I'm a different homosexual because X." is the next natural step away from the cognitive dissonance of "I'm not a homosexual."