The Disdain for Submissiveness and the General Idea that "Love" isn't Real.

June 3, 2015

I've been browsing the TRP subreddits off and on for a while now. Ever since I was introduced to it by my ex, who still posts semi-frequently, I've always been struggling to fully comprehend what it is you guys are trying to do. I see a lot of talk about "game", and this usually boils down to being confident and "just going for it". I'm all for that. I think that's the way life should be approached in general. Just be confident and the world opens up for you in ways you never thought possible. That's fine.

What boggles the mind, however, is the mindset that everyone has to be a player in order to enjoy their life. Indeed, if you aren't going around life fucking whoever you want to fuck and getting what you want, who you want, when you want it, then you've simply not swallowed the pill well enough.

I see sometimes that people come to these subreddits and ask for advice. Nine times out of ten, they've hit hard times in their life, and they're looking for a way out of the hole they've managed to find themselves in. I'm all for advice in improving ones life, and much of the advice is sound, but it doesn't take long before I start seeing talks of being "alpha" written all over the boards.

It's getting to a point where the only real understanding I have of TRP and altTRP none-the-less is that it's basically one big guide to being "alpha". I see people say that they gave up the idea of true love as if that's some kind of accomplishment. I see people say that they don't even care about being in a good relationship and just want to fuck the good-looking guys all day and they flaunt it like they've unlocked the secret to life. It's hard to watch, and while I understand some people are this way and are genuinely happy with this approach, this subreddit would have me think that if I believe in the concept of love at all, then I must be "beta", and thusly a submissive failure that gets stepped on all of their life.

Or something.

This also compounds how whenever someone mentions being a "beta", it's typically in the most negative light possible. Being a "beta" is like being a loser. It's like being socially retarded. It's like being an outcast. It's like being everything you don't ever want to be. Or, at least, that's what this sub would have me believe.

And yet submissive gay men exist everywhere. Gay men that want to be lead, and gay men that wish to lead them. It's a simple dynamic that seems to be half-rejected and one-sided when it comes to anything TRP. Most relationships have a man that fits the criteria of being an "alpha", and a man that fits the criteria of being a "beta" in them, for if both men were truly "alpha", there'd be a constant power-struggle and the relationship probably wouldn't work to begin with.

The more I think about it, the more I realize how harmful the "alpha" and "beta" mindset actually is, especially when you consider the fact that the absolute grand majority of people you encounter in your everyday life won't be thinking in regards to anything of it. It turns life into a game. Everything is calculated, and nothing is natural. It's artificial and all pre-planned. God forbid if anything came from the heart, we don't do that whole "love" shit here. That'd be too beta.

Help me understand what the fuck is going on, altTRP, because I've been trying to grasp what you people actually want for almost a year and I still can't wrap my head around it.

The gist I've gotten is that you want to just fuck all the hot guys, never fall in love, not get married, and never stay in one relationship for too long. Every single one of you seems to want to go to the gym and get ripped, as that's the most consistent go-to advice given. It all just seems to contradict real life. In my experience, there's really not a damn thing in this subreddit that's actually been observed in the outside world as effective outside of being confident. Being confident is the best advice this subreddit has ever given, everything else is just... I don't know. Absurdity.

The /r/becomeaman subreddit is a fucking laughing stock. I see people make topics about how they go to the grocery store and all of the hot women flirt with them and give them their phone number. It's the most obvious load of shit, and yet the comments are all "nice bro haha good to see its working for you". I feel like I'm being trolled in that subreddit.

What kills me the most is how some of you will speak of insecurities, when getting so caught up in being an "alpha" seems like a very insecure thing to be doing to begin with.

I'm not trying to bash or be a total dick here, I'm just so goddamn lost. It's like I'm being shown the holy grail and it looks like an ordinary plastic red soho cup to me. Everyone else sees the grail, everyone else believes, but I'm just sitting there, looking around the room, throwing my hands up in the air and going "are you fucking kidding me?"

So, what's up, altTRP? Enlighten me. It's killing me to know.

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Post Information
Title The Disdain for Submissiveness and the General Idea that "Love" isn't Real.
Author Narrowminded
Upvotes 6
Comments 4
Date June 3, 2015 10:23 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit /r/altTRP
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