I'm dating what seems to be a nice man, but I'm so far outside of a 25+ year comfort zone pattern of LVM and abuse, it's like I am conditioned to seek toxicity and repel kindness. It's a subconscious comfort in fear and uncertainty. I've never met a man who worked for my attention, rather than the other way around. It scares me.

I feel like a child, blind in the world of dating. I'm wondering if anyone would mind if I DM'd a quick question, maybe once, maybe every now and again. It's always simple, it may be obvious to others but to me... I don't know how to label/address HV traits, or respond to them. I feel unworthy and intimidated.

To be honest, I'm embarrassed and ashamed by how much these previous men have manipulated and mistreated me to this point. I don't want to keep putting mybatupid questi9ns about good men out publicly on Reddit.