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Are there men out there who don’t either demonize or fetishize virginity?

January 6, 2021

I’m 19F and have never had sexual intercourse. I have done other things of a sexual nature, but never PIV. I don’t see myself getting into a relationship any time soon, so I predict it’s gonna be quite a while before I lose my virginity. That being said, it’s so frustrating how virginity is viewed for a woman. On one hand, you have men that think you’re prude, uptight, or think there may be a reason why other men don’t find you attractive enough. On the other hand, there’s the men that fetishize virginity and perceive you as pure and “untouched”, wanting desperately to be your first. Where are the men that don’t care about your sexual past and will be patient and understanding of your lack of experience without being overly eager about it? Part of me wants to just get it over with but I know that completely goes against my boundaries, and frankly I don’t wanna give a random man that satisfaction. Anyone have an optimistic story on this topic?

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Post Information
Title Are there men out there who don’t either demonize or fetishize virginity?
Author thepensiveporcupine
Upvotes 59
Comments 3
Date January 6, 2021 5:36 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit /r/askFDS
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/askFDS/are-there-men-out-there-who-dont-either-demonize.1059842
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/AskFDS/comments/krhdwt/are_there_men_out_there_who_dont_either_demonize/

[–]mshourglasss 48 points49 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Protect yourself by vetting men. Many will test your boundaries so you must be vigilant in enforcing them and never giving in to the devil on your shoulder. Have sex when you are with a man that puts your comfort, boundaries, & expectations at the forefront of his mind when doing it for the first time.

You can only do this by vetting a man.

[–]saint-jezebel 19 points20 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Right now, you are still young, so practice discernment with men. Dont tell men you are a virgin because this will only push them to push you more. It will just have to be something you keep to yourself until you feel the moment is right and thats far down the line, even in a relationship.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

As far as I know, no.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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