Has anyone else noticed it’s hard to be healthy around certain friends and relatives? Or be the changed version of yourself with them?

I was told by a family member that I needed to forgive my toxic sister because she’s butthurt that I cut her out of my life because I put my foot down on her 2 decades worth of bullying. And I was told I was bitter for calling out how unimpressive men are these days, saying that we women deserve better. Additionally, I folded like a baby with fighting back my innate need to prove that I’m “okay and doing well” so that I’m not asked so many questions about my personal life that I don’t want to disclose for various reasons. I’m still not 100% comfortable showing up as who I’ve worked really hard to be, thus was slipping back into some of my old doormat ways because I could pick up on the insecure energy that not only I myself was also used to, but that many women of my family also possess (it's a family trait that obviously I inherited). Like I had to shrink back into that place in order to still be relatable to them.

What do you do to not come across as “angry and bitter” when discussing dating topics? Or has your family become more receptive to your new behaviors and line of thinking? Have they been receptive to your change? How do you hold onto your guns to show up as authentic when triggered/around people who remind you of your past?