Critique my wife's ultimate shit test

fuckmrp · 2017-07-09T03:33:21+00:00

I'll translate for you:

I feel sad now therefore I've always been sad. I expect to be happy all of the time and you're responsible for my feelings. You have set boundaries and I'm going attempt to erode them forever. I'm going to equate your assertiveness to control and cry about loneliness cause guilt. This doesn't have a solution, I'm not going to do anything to fix this. It's not a real problem, i just wanted to let you know it feels bad when I don't get my way.

Sincerely,

Today's Feelz

Someone needs a hug.

BobbyPeru · 2017-07-09T01:01:46+00:00

Need more background information... Let's start with when did you swallow the pill?

Have you done the sidebar readings?

Do you lift? For how long... Is she in shape?

This doesn't look like a shit test. This looks like a woman who has checked out.

My gut tells me you may have gone Rambo.

Archwinger · 2017-07-09T01:57:14+00:00

Your wife apparently doesn't think it's okay for you to say no when she asks for something.

But this isn't about the dogs and whether or not they should get to sleep on a people bed. This is about your grown up child thinking you always say no all the time about everything.

Remember, kids don't get it. When you say "no you cannot have candy for dinner", your kid doesn't know that this is in her best interest. She just thinks you hate her. When you won't buy her a new car because you don't have the money, she just thinks you're being mean and unreasonable.

Imagine that your wife is a kid. Since she kind of is. Every once in awhile, you have to take her out for ice cream. Otherwise, your constant barrage of saying no loses its effect.

gadfly_am_I · 2017-07-09T16:16:37+00:00

I cannot tell much about your relationship from this post. All I can say is that when my wife starts talking about "feeling alone" it is a clue to me that I have not been giving her enough time, attention, affection, etc. In mrp we have to balance alpha and beta qualities for the relationship to work for her. Too much alpha and she starts feeling alone. This might be a comfort test.

RuleZeroDAD · 2017-07-09T00:52:57+00:00

KolaDesi · 2017-07-10T19:52:57+00:00

Woha, this is a bomb, dude!

I guess she's giving you a last chance to be a good boyfriend (or she would have left you without explanation), or she'll go away since she is so sad with you.

If you want to continue this relationship, talk with her and see if you two can keep to be together. Good luck.

20119975 · 2017-07-09T01:13:20+00:00

It's not a shit test; it's a comfort test.

Red-Curious · 2017-07-09T01:08:39+00:00

MRP principles are supposed to foster attraction and increase your SMV. You are obviously having the opposite effect. From what she describes (if her perception can be trusted), you're too alpha. MMSLP talks about this. /u/cholomite said it best:

Tingles without fuzzies won't last. Fuzzies without tingles are worthless.

You have built your entire relationship on tingles. This is the biggest issue I've seen since coming on MRP. Most people are from TRP where fuzzies don't matter at all, or they're beta guys who have already mastered fuzzies. As a result, most of the stuff that gets pushed here is the need to alpha-up. Your need is to beta-up, and you're not going to find many posts about that.

Learn to give her some fuzzies and she'll settle down. Go re-read (assuming you already got through it) MMSLP's chapter on good beta qualities and report back.

BluepillProfessor · 2017-07-10T17:05:43+00:00

Mother fuckers are NEVER happy. NEVER! They bitch and bitch about being "alone" because the husband won't make a decision. Then they bitch when you start making decisions. Then they bitch about something else when they forget what they were bitching about.

TLDR: Bitches gonna bitch.

if you want to stay here, that's how it is

Damn right!

it's always about "your rules" and what "you think is better", but you don't think about me, about what makes me happy

Is this true? We preach over and over again to men on MRP that they need to stop worrying about what the wife thinks.

HOWEVER, that advice is for pussified men who worship at the holy golden uterus and THAT doesn't sound like you.

Guys who already DNGAF and who are already pursuing their personal interests may need some direction to actually start thinking like a leader!

Good leaders consider the interest, needs, and wants of the people they lead.

Are you? The wife doesn't think so and you SHOULD NOT argue with her or even discuss this. However, you SHOULD consider the complaints of your First Officer. The MRP paradigm isn't Captain-Deck Hand! It is Captain-First Officer! I would examine with masculine introspection whether you are treating her ideas, thoughts, and opinions like a trusted First Officer- or whether you are treating them like they are coming from an unworthy (and annoying) subordinate.

askmeanything2 · 2017-07-09T01:37:03+00:00

Given this is the ultimate shit test, in your opinion, your reply should be the ultimate agree & amplify

anotherswingingdick · 2017-07-09T06:06:22+00:00

Also, what's she doing in Sydney? You mentioned she's hot and you're wealthy. Is she using your money to go on solo vacations?

concur

hey OP.... what's the last excellent thing this woman did for you?

If you're so "motivated", then Flip The Script

Fight Fire with Fire.

Tell her she can have the dogs in the bedroom every time that she [insert something you want that she seldom does for you]

In this subreddit, brothers, we do not issue free Pussy Pass'es

bodybuzz420 · 2017-07-09T14:51:04+00:00

Holly fuck is she going to pound a dude while you are away on your business trip....she's been thinking about if for some time and she's made her mind up with this nothing fight... big warning signs

[deleted] · 2017-07-10T04:41:50+00:00

"I ... I ... I" = comfort test (its not about the nail, she actually spelled this out for you, poor girl). She wanted you to secure the relationship, not deal with whatever words came out of her mouth*.

I'm concerned about these rules she's bringing up. You are not her father, you are supposed to enforce boundaries using covert communication like dread.

What she's describing is tyranny, no free human (adult) should have to live like that. You want to dominate her so she instinctively, voluntarily and happily follows your leadership. Being domineering is just being an asshole narcissist.

I haven't seen your history, but this sounds like a case of another redpill rambo. You need to calibrate your reactions [and A/B ratio] before its too late to lock your shit down.

And just to be clear, /u/fuckmrp is giving an accurate translation, this is why MRP is TRP on hard mode.

Bedtimeshine · 2017-07-10T13:27:18+00:00

What I would say. "This is who I am. What am I supposed to do with this? You seem to be rewriting our marriage. You recently went on about how much you love me and how you wanted me to go to Sydney with you and now your telling me the opposite. So which is it? and how am I supposed to take anything you say seriously now? If your building up to tell you me that your feeling less for me and feeling less committed to the marriage then maybe you need to come out with it and this needs to be a different conversation. How is you telling me this right before we are planning on spending time apart not akin to dropping a bomb on my trust in you?"

ghcoval · 2017-07-10T19:06:34+00:00

Some of these replies are good, others are not.

You're wife isn't happy, give in a little it won't kill ya, make her feel like you're willing to give up a little comfort for her and she'll do the same

Stolles · 2017-07-10T21:45:14+00:00

I just have to ask, does she know about TRP? Has she seen any of this? Why or why not?

MrsMandelbrot · 2017-07-11T01:13:56+00:00

Perhaps you've successfully implemented your MAP and she is starting to view you as a captain. "Just checking in, Cap! Wanted to let you know that I'm feeling really shitty lately."

motivated777 · 2017-07-09T00:32:48+00:00

Better yet. Just write your reply.

All_Ads_Deceive · 2017-07-09T03:40:09+00:00

You're right it's a shit test not a comfort test. She's over exaggerating a simple issue and trying to dread you and make you feel guilty.

Don't "act more beta". That's exactly what your wife is trying to achieve. If she calls you "mean" and says she's depressed, you'll cave into all her demands.

Also, what's she doing in Sydney? You mentioned she's hot and you're wealthy. Is she using your money to go on solo vacations? This is the actual issue I see in this post.

Title	Critique my wife's ultimate shit test
Author	motivated777
Upvotes	8
Comments	50
Date	July 9, 2017 12:29 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/6m4ima/critique_my_wifes_ultimate_shit_test/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/critique-my-wifes-ultimate-shit-test.205898 https://theredarchive.com/post/205898