Last month or so has been rough around the house. Multiple medical issues are being dealt with on both ends. Two ED trips for wifey for valid reasons. Her parents are moving out of state and that is turning out to be a bigger blow than she thought. Background is, she is truly way more anxious in life than I thought possible and still function. My biggest consistent failure thus far is nuking shit tests that are comfort tests, I think.

Example of shit on my end: yesterday we got a new toilet. She wanted to install it on her own while I was at work, at the same time complaining that she probably wouldn't be able to go to the new martial arts place I started to go to because her neck hurts from a prior injury ( one of those ER trips) So I tell her to not worry about it, I would take care of it and that if her neck hurts, she shouldn't do the install at all.

I come home and she is about half way done with the install. I shrug it off like whatever. ( my mistake, she expected gratitude ) . I help her finish it up, and am starting to get ready to go the class. She either accidentally threw out or we never got some hardware for the toilet seat. I look around, tell her I don’t see it, and say don’t worry about it, I will take care of it, and we have another bathroom right next door to our bedroom, so no worries. She starts off about how I am getting mad at her for loosing the hardware, like really bad to the point that I know she will not hear anything I say. I tell her , no babe, I am not mad, shit happens, we can deal with this later, don’t worry about it, I will take care of it. ( I don’t have a recent—like 8 month, history of forgetting to do things, in the past, yes, my part of my problem) .

She goes off on me that I am bitching to her and that I should just go to the martial arts class otherwise I am going to be late. My response is, I am not going at this point to class because I am going to be late. Enter screaming about how I should just go because she doesn't want to be around me. I basically shrug and start to leave. I tell her I am going out for a while, but not class because there is no point. She starts moving around fast, I head out door to my car and pull out as I see her enter the garage look at me , turn around and walk back in. So whatever I leave and go just chill out for a bit.

She texts me a bunch of shit about how I left her ( not how I left her there, but about how I LEFT her , and now I made my own bed etc etc) SO I proceed to fail that shit by calling her and saying look, I am just out for a while.

I come home an hour later, she is calmer and is just getting into me heavy , not yelling , just telling me that she has never left me etc etc and I am such an asshole, and that I knew she was getting ready to go to the class with me. I just responded with something along the lines of “words have consequences, do not ask me to leave if you don’t want me to. “

A bit later we go to Lowes, get the right hardware for the toilet, finish it up etc. All very civil. I decided that I want a bath so I draw one, ask her if she wants to join me. She says she does but she feels embarrassed and insecure in her body and our relationship and how does she get the feelings of being cherished back. (just like that, all in one breath) Anyway I literally undress her and walk her into the bath. Proceed to take a nice bath, chatting about garbage. Decide to go out for a late meal because apparently she “forgot to eat all day”. Whatever… We get back around midnight, I am still kind of in neutral towards her. We go to bed, she is on my chest then she is on my dick, etc.

I can break this down myself in terms of failures, but I really expected to wind up having a fucked night all night because of the loss or frame and total drunkenness on my part… so.. WTF?