~ archived since 2018 ~

Good responces to rejection? Need to bust a nut dudes!!

mrbadassmotherfucker
September 10, 2019
7 upvotes
/r/askMRP

35y, 5'9", 175lbs, 14% BF, married for 8 years, kids: 2 boys (4yrs & 2yrs)

Back Squat: 375 lbs

Deadlift: 410 lbs

Bench Press: 275 lbs

Dips: 175 lbs added

Overhead Press: 155 lbs

Pullups: 155 lbs added

Pendlay rows: 255 lbs

Readings

MMSLP, NMMNG, Book of Pook 50%, Daily readings of MRP/ASKMRP posts.

Currently Reading: WISNIFG, sex god method

Obviously the best responce is to NGAF, but it can be hard when you really need to bust a nut and it's been a few days... And quite frankly I haven't got the frame to deal with it yet.

I don't wanna be a butt hurt little pussy, so usually just STFU, but I know she can see through my wet pancake of a frame and even though I ain't said shit, I still seem butt hurt.

While I work on understanding how to hold frame and not end up a withering mess, desperate to wet my cock, what is the best course of action to take when rejected?

This shit will obviously take time for me to grasp...

So what would be a good tip for learning how to NGAF? How did you learn to NGAF and what was the turning point for you, if there was one? When rejected for sex, is it ok just to say, "No problem" and go do something else, or is it better to say nothing?

Cheers fellas.

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Post Information
Title Good responces to rejection? Need to bust a nut dudes!!
Author mrbadassmotherfucker
Upvotes 7
Comments 36
Date September 10, 2019 9:08 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit /r/askMRP
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/good-responces-to-rejection-need-to-bust-a-nut.252774
https://theredarchive.com/post/252774
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/d2ej36/good_responces_to_rejection_need_to_bust_a_nut/
Red Pill terms in post
WISNIFGframeNMMNG
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Comments

[–]hack3geRed Beret32 points33 points  (13 children) | Copy Link

The trick to not giving a fuck is actually not giving a fuck.

[–]BobbyPeruRed Beret7 points8 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

The trick to not giving a fuck is actually not giving a fuck.

Unfortunately for OP, this is the correct answer.

But, it has to start somewhere. We talk about the basics, and they never change:

  • Lift

  • STFU

  • Develop a social life

  • Read the sidebar

  • Passive dread

By doing these basics over time, an abundance mentality and frame are developed, and a DNGAF attitude are a direct result of abundance and frame.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I'll keep working towards my goal then and hopefully it'll develop over time. In the mean time I've really gotta practice at least faking it.

[–]i-am-the-prize3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

yup, STFU and grind your teeth. consider it penance for years of being BP.

visualize her leaving you. visualize your life 'after her'. visualize what you would do with your free time.

1) notice you don't die, 'post her'

2) notice the world keeps spinning, 'post her'

3) now actually go do at least some of these things you visualized doing. maybe not go become a white water rafting guide leaving the household, but the other stuff you're not doing now/locally

4) when you truly realize you'll be ok if shit blows up, and a lot of your misery and some of the nerves/angst/mateguarding were all about ego protection and fear, the NGAF becomes real. possibly even an upside, because the new RP you will have some serious fun if shit blows up. by raising your SMV (for you Frame, Game and lack of Neediness, becoming Outcome Independent is job number one) you either improve your marriage or improve yourself enough to be primed for single life. win-win.

and don't ask for sex, try holding back a day or 3 then doing an 'assumed close'. flirt that day ("tonight I will show you something new, something I've wanted to try for a while...") get her hamster going. what could it be, why does he want to try something new? did someone show him something new?. ANYTHING other than being needy.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Well said, I'll definitely take this on board man

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 4 points5 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

So, when you've been blue pill for so long and have given too many fucks about shit you shouldn't have, how do you change your mindset? Should it be instant?

[–]johneyapocalypseThe one that says "Bad Motherfucker"14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Should it be instant?

You must be american.

Consider this:

  • Your wife has been subjected to your obnoxious, repugnant personality for eight years.
  • She has been disappointed by your sexual shortcomings and inadequacies as a man for 416 weeks.
  • She has been dreaming of someone, anyone, other than you - and your weak ass - lying next to her at night - oftentimes likely considering the company of a lesbian to be preferable to you - for 2,920 days.

Was she not worthy of this four-star, "instant" treatment herself?

Of course not, fuckhead, and nor are you.

Learn about BPP and what he has to say about it, asshole.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You’ll give a fuck and continue to give a fuck despite your best efforts. That’s why you STFU. One day you will give less fucks... and then eventually none. That will take months or years depending on the work you out into yourself.

[–]hack3geRed Beret1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

For a dude who has decent lifts you really are a giant faggot, no?

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Never said I wasn't, but thanks for clarifying

[–]Jacked_Reiki_Dude2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Nevertheless, your lifts are rock solid. That counts for something.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Said it better than I.

[–]markpf732 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

It took me 2 years to honestly hit IDGAF, OI, and to really understand “the stay plan is the same as the go plan”. That phrase finally made sense one day. Before the 2 year point I always wondered what that really meant. Now I know.

[–]hack3geRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yep there is only one plan and it’s on her to give me a reason to stick around and keep her turn going.

[–]Balls_Wellington_18 points19 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

How do you normally act when it's something you don't give a fuck about?

"Hey buddy, want to grab happy hour?"

"Nah, I'm heading out of town and want to get a head start."

"Oh, next time then."

That's a conversation you've probably had a dozen times, and you never thought twice about it. You certainly never got resentful or complained that they weren't fulfilling their side of the friendship.

You also never thought twice about grabbing a beer without them.

And if you ask every week and they never say yes, you probably found a different group to go with.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This actually makes a lot of sense.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

When I first started I went full Rambo and sex was taken away after a small bout of incredible sex. I was losing my shit over rejection. It was a shit test to show me how much of a faggot I was. She held the mirror up to my face and made me look at it until I got mad at myself instead of being mad at her for rejecting a sexy stud like myself. I thought because I made six figures, had a six pack and dressed nice she would be all over me. I didn't realize that my weak frame made her pussy dry. Being attractive is a whole package deal and having frame is probably the most important factor. Fix your frame and you fix your problem.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Yes. Yes exactly. I've been thinking this for the past week now. I've got to get my head round it. Thanks.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

As others have said you have to really ngaf. My frame in reality is that I don't actually give a fuck. It is a fact that everyone who knows me understands. That is what having frame is. When people know they cannot manipulate you they stop trying. The byproduct is that you become extremely attractive when you aren't being a weak faggot pushed around by everyone else's emotions and wants.

What do you want? Do that and stop caring with your actions not your words. Over time, your frame won't be tested as much because everyone knows it's real and who you are. Faking until you make it is fine, but don't expect to fool your wife. She knows you better than anyone because she has seen you at your weakest. She knows exactly what kind of faggot you are because she has been manipulating and studying you for years.

Just STFU does wonders. Get some confidence and lose the oneitis and your OI will increase. Stop focusing on her and go out and game some other women. If you fail, maybe your ego will chill out and you won't expect too much from wifey. If random bitches can smell the faggot on you then you have a lot of work to do.

Have you studied the levels of dread? Where you at with that?

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Since yesterday I've done quite a bit of reading on frame and I get the concept more clearly now and what I really need to do to develop my frame and NGAF attitude.

Started gaming other women recently and generally being more social. It's funny, I used to be fucking good at this... I'm still pretty good at it, outside of my relationship so I know I can do it.

I have studied the dread levels, but need to re-read a few times again.

I'm confident I'll make strides going forward. I think just coming out of this blue pill phase of my life has really woken me up and I still have a massive chain attached to me from it that I'm slowly hacking away at.

I appreciate all the help brother.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Dont bust a nut until you no longer caring about busting nuts.

[–]SepeanRed Beret6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

First you handle rejection with standard LMR techniques. A soft no is an option to show (or at least practice) frame and game, don’t just back off.

If she then gives a hard no, don’t say “no problem” or something like that, that signals you don’t wan’t her to feel bad or feel sorry for you. And you shouldn’t signal that you’re that indifferent to her not catering to your whims either.

Just move on from it, do something else. Maybe with her, maybe without her. Watching comedy is great, you don’t seem butthurt when you’re laughing.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks, good tips.

[–]vplatt0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

This.

[–]shouldergirdle4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

MRP is playing the long game. If you are looking for a set of words that will get you laid, they don't exist. If you are looking for the perfect response to a rejection from your wife, that doesn't exist either. As long as your immediate response to the rejection is not emotional, you are doing fine. Appropriate examples: "No problem", STFU, walk away, continue reading, "OK", "Hmmm", "any bacon left in the fridge". An emotional response will hurt you and unemotional response is appropriate.

However, MRP can give you the correct long term response to your wife's rejection and that is to improve yourself as a man. Become the best man that you can be. Become a great father to your kids, earn tons of money and use your money wisely, maximize your health and physique, become socially engaging to men and women, improve your dress and hygiene. Develop a set of values and live your life according to those values. etc.

Women are ALWAYS in competition with each other. Your wife's friend will be talking about her beta husband, and you wife will be comparing the husband to you. Your wife will be checking out the guys at work and she will be comparing these guys to you. Your wife's friends will make appreciative comments to her about you. All of these female interactions create competition anxiety for your wife. This is how her "hamster" gets moving. The long term effects of your improvements as a man will get your wife to notice and appreciate you. If she doesn't notice, some other woman will. The stay plan is the go plan.

[–]ice_walkerHead Negotiator2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

The trick is to focus on something else instead of trying to not focus on something (sex in this case). Find your passion in life, do it and do it often, make this your focus and you'll be able to think more clearly about the sex situation.

I didn't have sex today? Nothing to worry about, I'm going rock climbing/surfing/skiing/collecting stamps tomorrow which is as awesome.

The point is you'll start to see sex as one thing among others to spice up your life, not the only one thing that can make you feel good. That's when your thoughts around it will clear up and it'll become easier to make rational choices regarding your situation.

At this point you'll be living in a frame of happiness and needs being met, into wich you can invite others, instead of being needy and trying to convince your wife to give you some sex to make you feel better.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Great explanation, cheers for this.

[–]hIamNeo2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is an old thread that aims at getting back your dick wet with your LTR https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/2lpafb/the_12_step_plan_of_dread_book_excerpt_from_my/

I suggest doing all levels up to 4 without waiting further then progress as written.

[–]strngExtent1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I appreciate this post. Recent situation occured where I admittedly lost frame and told her I'd probably be better spending my time with people who blah blah blah. She hamstered and apologized. But that doesn't negate the fact that I could have handled this way better. Sex is frequent and I was horny, I walked out of the shower with a raging hard on and she was naked so i was ready and willing. Soft no, I got pissed, zero OI, and overall beta faggotry. I'll charge it to the game, but I'm grateful my ass was shown so I can focus on getting better and stop giving myself more credit than what's due..thanks OP and all responders.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I feel ya. Obviously there's plenty of work to do. Let's not get complacent just because were getting laid a few more time then when we were 100% BP. We need to put this faggotory shit behind us and advance brother.

[–]DeplorableRay0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lift. Bye girl, headed to the gym.

[–]mrpthrowa0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

At your lift stats... you should probably be competing. 155 lb weighted pullups? I reckon your wilks is well over 300.

I'm skeptical though... anybody can say anything on the internet, your weighted pullup and OHP have quite the disparity.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

These are my one max reps according to syymetric strength.

Pull ups I've been lifting 88lb for 3x8, so I'm also a bit unsure of the one max rep here... Probably should test and adjust accordingly, just trusted the website tbh.

My OHP is weak. Something I wanna concentrate on coming up. Had an AC joint injury a while ago and have found it tough to progress since.

DL I'm on 385lb at 3x4

Squat I'm on 360lb at 3x3

Bench is 245lb at 3x4

Dips is 110lb at 3x8

So yeah, most of these seem right to me, but maybe because the dips and pulls are based of higher repetitions they are slightly skewed.

I should just test this shit myself... Problem is I workout (and always have) in my home gym and could do with a couple of spots for testing 1rm

[–]RedPillGlasses0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

“My last relationship ended because of lack of sex. I hope that doesn’t happen to us.”

[–]addwater0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Sound like a needy little husband with nothing better to do.

Go wank into your hand you fuck.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

You're definitely right that I'm needy still. I'm no gap, so that's not an option. Find I have more fire without it and don't watch porn anymore.

I've always had a lot of hobbies. I'll put more focus on them and reduce my focus from sex so much. Fuck how I feel, it's fucking pathetic and I know it.

I will change!

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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