Initiating when injured?

October 25, 2016

BLUF: I sustained an injury that temporarily prevents me from being able to physically lead/be dominant during sex....need advice on how to handle LTR during recovery.

About me: Mid 30's. LTR with no kids. Swallowed the Red Pill about 8 months ago. Read the side bar and recommended books. Life long lifter and fitness enthusiast. Into adventure sports and have a decent social life.

The LTR: Typical story, began as alpha and suffered the beta regression we read about so much. Since finding RP, I've been using STFU, DNGAF, OI, AA, & AM to handle shit tests and have seen excellent results- arguments have basically gone away. Running light dread but need to keep pressure on myself to move that up a notch or two. Sex has been more frequent but still get the starfish every so often.

The Problem: So I have inured myself doing one of my hobbies and while temporary, I'm not in any condition to be physically dominant with the GF until I heal. This is only like a month long problem, but I'm unsure how to handle things. Like others have observed, she shit tested the piss out of me when I first injured myself. I handled that and she toned it down. Now, I know from my reading that she can be a mother or a lover but not both and that if she sees me a burden it destroys the tingles. This is the tricky bit since there are some things around the house I simply cannot do right now that will fall on her...tingles gone, vag dry. Got it. When it comes to sex, as I mentioned, things have been improving but it still falls on me to initiate (I know that's my job), get her ready, get me ready, be dominant and assume the more physical end of things. I don't get much effort from her- in other words, unless I put in all the effort and make things happen, it doesn't happen...she's happy to lay there or let me move her around but doesn't bring much to the table otherwise. I understand this since I assume that she probably wasn't/isn't as attracted to me as she used to be and I'm working on fixing that. Now the problem is that during my recovery, I physically can't do all those things so if I initiate sex, I wouldn't be able to take that dominant role....So, my question is should I go into "healing monk mode" and focus on myself, PT, nutrition, etc. and forget about initiating? Or, if not, what advice can you offer on how to handle things, hold frame, initiate, and not risk her viewing this as a beta-backslide?

TLDR: I'm injured and can't assume the dominant sexual role that the GF is accustomed to. For the next month should I even bother initiating or just focus on getting better?

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Post Information
Title Initiating when injured?
Author Coniferous_88
Upvotes 1
Comments 7
Date October 25, 2016 2:45 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit /r/askMRP
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