The push/pull game

mindfulbutgutless · 2019-04-23T18:12:43+00:00

You know how a dog will play fetch until YOU are sick of it?

Never seeming like it wants it to end and will fetch until it dies of exhaustion.

Maybe even it will come up and drop the ball on your lap sometimes when you are just sitting there.

Then...if you say , skip too many days of no fetch you notice some chewed up slippers?

Yeah . That.

Persaeus · 2019-04-23T18:20:53+00:00

huh, thought you were lot smarter

"Blah, blah, blah, you are annoying/"

she's saying some variant of "fight me" or "fight for me" (aka prove you luv me)

and you respond with "meh"

"fight me" is easy, basically "so am i; but what are you" or agree and amplify.

"fight for me" is more dangerous water's because you can't deer or supplicate for real. you can supplicate in jest, which is my go to in this case. basically, "your so wonderful, i can't figure out why you keep me around, oh yeah the big fat cock". end scene

she's seeking some drama. give it to her

itiswr1tten · 2019-04-24T02:53:31+00:00

This reply brought to you in haiku

What you have is not

enough, creeping desire

Personal problem?

tspitsatgp · 2019-04-24T04:29:53+00:00

The question is... are you ready to be alone? If I recall correctly that was your reason for upgrading a plate to a girlfriend in the first place. My guess is you have some unaddressed codependency issues due to the fact that you haven't been single in a long time which is causing you to push/pull because you don't want a relationship but you don't know how to live without one. You are a comfort seeker.

2019-04-23T19:11:32+00:00

Sounds more like shit tests. They definitely become boring in an LTR. Nice DNGAF

screechhater · 2019-04-24T00:58:42+00:00

So when I was a lad, the older brother gave some advice of fucking the same old pussy ....

slap her ass, pull her hair, come on her tits, ride her ass standing up. It’s your job to make it exciting, because, well that’s what men do, and being the aggressive creature - you fuck and blow a load, as into the same pussy constantly, it can get boring, but that’s where you get into the planning of fucking her in surprise places or positions. So the same with interactions with her, verbally

Lead. Faggot.

Do you even lift anymore ?

Mandy become “boring” or have you lost your frame ?

RPeed · 2019-04-24T04:16:26+00:00

Heh, I was also curious if this would happen based off your previous posts.

Its just math dude: she’s pushing for more than you’re willing to give. So you either concede and start the downward path or walk.

Isn’t that how we all ended up here in the first place?

For the record I think you could breath new life into it with manufactured drama but I wouldn’t want to do it either. But you did say you’ve been monogamous for a while. Maybe the competition anxiety is lower than you think right this moment.

Either way: not sure even a high value man gets to have his cake and eat it forever I.e. spin the same plate at the same speed infinitely. 10 months sounds right for expectations to come into conflict.

freshona · 2019-04-24T09:59:34+00:00

Tell her you'll ~~get married~~ be 'official' once you can clear off Mrs. Red from your back. It's not like you're afraid of lying, right?

I'd love to hear how that unravels in the next few months. Let us know how she reacts when you stop her daydreaming as she's picking the curtains for your new home.

Rogue68486 · 2019-04-23T18:03:26+00:00

What is your objective in applying push pull ?

You have rudimentary ability to do it although it seems like you're not using it to escalate or achieve an objective.

And or realizing it's important in maintaining a sexual relationship.

bowhunter6 · 2019-04-23T18:38:29+00:00

Having read a lot of your comments on here for a while now, I’m assuming your sex is on point, as in, you’re fucking her like a warlord when you’re with her. Sometimes, though, they can still get a little comfortable, and maybe a change up is in order. New place, new style, some real envelope-pushing dominance (even beyond your normal), something like that might help keep her on her toes and get her back to a nice submissive sex kitten state for a spell.

Otherwise, I don’t think comfort is your issue. Your standard mini-ghosting (like a soft soft next) of 6-24 hours works like a charm for me. As you know, your mileage may vary, depending on the bitch.

These little mini-tests they give are always a good check to see if you are slipping a bit in some area. Sometimes it’s leadership, or keeping that pussy wet (IMing is the easiest way when you are apart if you are a nasty mfer like me and can easily keep her engaged, and then ghost for a bit, little pushes and pulls during the day), or even sometimes it’s you not being fun/exciting/adventurous as you have been in the past.

With a little reflection, you’ll know what needs to be done. You got this.

2019-04-24T00:05:51+00:00

The infatuation (bullshit romantic love) stage is now gone and she’s getting bored. She is creating the push/pull - not you! She is doing this to stay attracted to you and build tension, because you’re not. The tension is released by fucking, then the cycle starts again.

Women love the drama, and if you don’t provide it, they’ll get bored and shit/ comfort test. You’re probably too tired mentally with all the other bullshit going on in your life to NGAF to maintain this and game her. Sooner or later, as the dog chasing the ball analogy goes, she will stop chasing the ball if you don’t throw it (i.e. move on). Four years into my second longest LTR and this dynamic hasn’t changed, but the difference is I create the push/pull and I set this tone in the beginning which has always driven her attraction. She’s in my frame, not vice versa.

Your next level game is to reflect on how does she react to your hard ‘no’s? If she’s the type to get vindictive in any way, fuck her off, no matter how good a fuck she is, unless you just see her as a plate. You don’t need this bullshit in your life. Tell the cunt to pack her bags if she has anything at your place. Otherwise, ride out the shit storm in your personal life until you’re ready to game her, under your terms when mentally ready.

SorcererKing · 2019-04-24T04:18:21+00:00

Do not try and bend the spoon, that's impossible. Instead, only try to realize the truth... there is no spoon. Then you will see it is not the spoon that bends, it is only yourself.

SteelToeShitKicker · 2019-04-24T16:42:24+00:00

It's a truly terribly thought that this shit never ends. No matter how strong, ripped, rich, the shit never stops.

How Bill Gates gets harassed by his ugly wife to do more chores:

"Even Melinda Gates Has Struggled to Get Her Husband Bill to Do His Fair Share"

http://fortune.com/2019/04/22/melinda-gates-bill-gates-book/

2019-04-24T06:56:58+00:00

Hey dipshit - focus on the value add - both long term and short term. And if you aren't adding value, fuck off and get out. I can almost guarantee you won't miss Mandy, even though she might miss you. Go back to harem game - probably more your style. You're going to be broken until you're not - no shame in owning it.

It's like a bandaid - sure ripping it off can sting, but you're better off having had it than not. Don't fester around waiting to turn into some nasty infection.

And why are you even paying attention to the opinions of random nobodies? Makes no sense.

MrChad_Thundercock · 2019-04-23T20:54:55+00:00

You sound boring as fuck.

Always be Gaming faggot.

If she says “bla bla bla you are annoying” say that’s what they all say get over here and pull your cock out ready to fuck her.

What’s your problem soldier?

Read up on Mystery’s cat string theory.

helaughsinhidden · 2019-04-23T18:42:00+00:00

push/pull game is starting to get pervasive

She's bored. Countpudyoola's dog brings you a ball for one reason and one reason only, to play. You can choose to throw it and play... or don't. Like the dog, her game is just a bid for attention and that seems to be all it is in this case. Push and pull is simply about creating tension in order to release that tension somehow. To build anticipation which can lead to excitement. It can be quite fun.

Who knows. You assume I have a plan. I do not. (from your comment reply)

This is a problem too. You should be intentional and mission minded. This is why it's the most common advice to use texting for logistics only, not because it's bad to chat, but because men aren't good at it. Have a plan, work it, and have some fun.

Youdontgottadenyit · 2019-04-24T05:27:59+00:00

Isn't this why they say being married is red pill on hard mode?

ReddJive · 2019-04-26T14:17:53+00:00

my first sensei was amazing. if he didn't have so many demons (recovering alcoholic, debt, and just a lousy businessman) he would have been one of the greats. he has all the skill you see and hear about. One day when I he was showing me some more advanced techniques he stopped and looked at me. He had been showing me something else. explains why it was so damn hard for me to pick up. Nothing was making sense.

He apologized and told me that all the things he's learned and trained in over the years he now sees things as the same. There is no difference between styles. It's all the same.

The japanese have a word for it. Mushin. When it all comes together and you just exist. it is both the end and the beginning. Things just make sense and sometimes you catch yourself questioning. I see it with high level practitioners. They will be in the middle of doing a kata or randori and then it will be like they wake up. They don't know what they were doing.

Sounds like in some way you hit that level where you are existing. Push/pull is always in play from what I see. It's tough to turn off. In my case it's always highly sexual I can't stop and don't bother any more. A girl i encounter in the morning and we share exchanges told me the other day that I am just relentless. I replied that I get that often, winked and walked off.

Push and pull is always in play, but I'd also add that you have to reel them in as well. You got them on the edge (sexually or emotionally) and then you have to bring them in closer to take that edge off. Meaning pulling them in closer once in a while.

scarmine34 · 2019-04-23T18:06:20+00:00

She is looking for a higher level of comfort as she rationalizes staying with you. Women are programmed to seek more security and you're not providing it.

I am not saying that you should be.

Personally, the next time she did that, I'd look at her and tell her she is acting like a child. Have the last 3 instances handy. Tell her it's ok, she probably doesn't even realize she is doing it, but that it's time for her to stop. Ask her to think about why she would play childish games.

Now - here is the key - she will likely fly off of the handle. Remember the 16 commandments of poon:

XV. Maintain your state control

You are an oak tree. You will not be manipulated by crying, yelling, lying, head games, sexual withdrawal, jealousy ploys, pity plays, shit tests, hot/cold/hot/cold, disappearing acts, or guilt trips. She will rain and thunder all around you and you will shelter her until her storm passes. She will not drag you into her chaos or uproot you. When you have mastery over yourself, you will have mastery over her.

Also rules: never say "sorry", never be afraid to lose her, be irrationally self confident, shit, just about every single one.

"Be in touch with her emotions" is what you're doing when you ask her why she might act like this.

https://heartiste.wordpress.com/the-sixteen-commandments-of-poon/

After she's blown up, you'll probably need to just walk out. Tell her you'll only talk to her when she has calmed down. If she texts you, reply once (you'll want to reply more as she texts more) that you'll talk to her tomorrow when she has calmed down. She'll insult you and bait you and try to get you to engage. Do not.

The next day, call her, feel her out a little and tell her you want to grab a coffee, somewhere public. If she blows up in public - you've got bigger issues.

Reiterate that you've noticed this and you've never said anything before - here you can drop a fake apology - say "I'm sorry I've never brought it up, because it's been bothering me for a while and we shouldn't let things stew". Then ask her again why she would act like that.

If she simply doesn't believe you and you can't get on the same page about her behavior - you're pretty fucked.

Anyway, that's how I would do it. Good luck.

Title	The push/pull game
Author	red-sfpplus
Upvotes	14
Comments	94
Date	April 23, 2019 5:47 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/bgjdt1/the_pushpull_game/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/the-pushpull-game.235891 https://theredarchive.com/post/235891