The original post to this update is here.

I wrote the original post the day after the event. That entire day I was met with complete radio silence and an extremely cold shoulder which I had said. I also discovered that Shark Week came way early and started the morning after the event.

This continued on for another full day and a half. I never changed my attitude and was still in a great mood, fun with the kids, etc. I was being fun with her but obviously met with coldness. She had a rough work schedule coming up and had to work two back to back 3rd shift nights on a job site. As I have always have I handled the kids and all other schedules, practices etc. that needed done. No biggie and was nice to be away from the coldness. The entire time from the event till now I had really been thinking about all the comments from everyone in the original post. Many of them really hit home and I realized that I have been improving myself and leading but I now that I was over compensating and needed to find that proper balance between in things. I didnt want to start a feelz conversation but at the same time I wanted to share my vision with her. I wanted to wait however until she was a little more cooled off first and was at least giving me more then stares as communication. That time never happened and this is where I was completely thrown off the rails.

She leaves for work with no communication with me. Not surprised nor did I care at the time. She eventually sends me a text asking how the kids are and that she is hoping to get out of the job by midnight. Before anyone asks, zero chance of cheating on her part. She is partners with relatives who are at the job site with her. I simply responded great, I hope everything goes well for you, the kids are all taken care off so just concentrate on the job. She starts texting back small talk which till this point wasnt happening. While she is onsite she keeps asking me what I am doing etc. (My take is dread that I am home at night talking to the girl from work). Well the job derails and she doesnt leave the job site till 4AM, gets home and passes out. I handle the kids etc like usual in the morning and let her sleep. She wakes up that afternoon and blows my phone up non-stop telling me how appreciative she is that I handled everything while she was working etc. Complete polar opposite of what was happening just days prior.

So, she goes on the job again, gets home around midnight this time and is completely exhausted. I was up working in the garage when she got home and walked in with her. As soon as we get in the kitchen she drops her stuff turns around and dives into my chest and wraps her arms around me and apologizes for being such a bitch the other night!!! She never apologizes, EVER. I just stayed cool wrapped my arms around her kissed her on the head and told her I appreciated the apology and left it at that. We go upstairs to bed and she showers, jumps into bed and is complains how cold she is and slides all up next to me. I am thinking initiate but anticipating a Shark Week shut down. Not to mention at this point I am completely surprised by the 180 taking place. She starts rubbing her ass on me and I get hard. She complains again about being cold and I tell her warm your hands on this and slide her hands down to my dick. She immediately starts giving me an HJ and gets all into it. I was still going to initiate sex but never got to that point. She says she has her period but wants to make up for the other night. She proceeds to rub herself through her shorts while jacking me off. I was still pushing initiation of piv but she doesnt even let the words get out of my mouth and proceeds to blow me. I am not talking a duty bj but a full blown gagging face fuck. This is the shit she used to do back in the day!!! She kept rubbing herself till she came about 2 or 3 times all the while I was going off on her mouth. I finished on her face and tits while she came a 4th time. She took my dick out of her mouth just long enough to ask me to cum on her!!! Since then she has been happy as hell and bouncing around the house. She had to work another full day yesterday and literally came home and was exhausted. In bed last night I was not going to initiate but I did kino and kept it sexual all day. As we were laying there she said I am exhausted but I can tell you are so hard and proceeded to give me an HJ (not that it matters but still Shark Week) and asked me to come on her tits.

So, what is my take away on all this? I dont know and am really trying to process it. I think dread on a couple things is in play here. Number one, the dread of the girl from work. The text she saw clearly didnt imply I was cheating but there was flirting involved and it was clear this girl would fuck me if I pushed. Second, I think seeing the actual lawyer bill really hit home and made her realize I am not playing around when it comes to pursuing things if the marriage doesnt get better. I think on some level she thought I was bullshitting her. Third, I didnt bend during the time she was mad at me. In the past I would have been apologizing non-stop and moping around the house. I didnt do that this time because I did nothing wrong and wasnt afraid of her emotions. So some of the questions I have are:

  1. I want to share my vision but dont want to initiate a feels conversation. Would it be wise to start that conversation or now just let this play out the way it is and if she wants to talk later share?

  2. Anyone elses takes on the 180? I didn't see this playing out this way with it being the main event. Maybe /u/schreechhater was right and it was just a comfort test?

  3. I clearly need to find that balance and not do the constant withdrawing all the time. All push and no pull doesnt work.