Wife and I have been married 10 years. I was pretty alpha before we met and went full on beta bitch after marriage. We have two kids under 9.
I took the pill several months ago and thought I was aces. Lifting, passing shit test, lots of the best sex since before we were married. Complete 180. Thought that I had my balls back.
3 months ago, her x reached out to her and they started an emotional affair. He lives in Germany, and all evidence points toward they haven't seen each other since before I met her. 90% sure they haven't fucked.
I thought I was being pretty alpha. I fuck her in all 3 holes on the regular, don't put up with her shit, and have a SMV that is beginning to surpass hers due to working the hell out of my MAP.
She says that she's attracted to me physically and him emotionally. I told her if she communicates with him without my involvement it will result in immediate divorce.
She wants one last private conversation with him so that she can "close this chapter of her life and have closure, which will enable her to truly focus on our relationship."
I don't trust my own judgement at this point. I've left out less important details to avoid rambling.
Should I allow this private conversation for the purpose of saving my family, will it be a sign of low value?
I know AWALT. Is she doing this as a reaction to my recent changes and she needs a beta bitch to control, or am I still a beta bitch and I just sprinkled alpha on my shit, and he's the true alpha? (He sounds like a pussy in their text. He sends her movies of his cats and always goes on about his feelings for her.) Or is this the ultimate shit test to see if I'll fight to keep and protect my family and not get butt hurt even when my family is on the line?
Please help me with this important decision.
Edit:grammar and added the shit-test option in 2nd question.