From as early as I can remember, my Mom has been an extreme micromanager of me and my sister. She refused to let us take any risks or responsibility growing up. Obviously learning to take risks & responsibility, make mistakes, understand consequences, and face fear is a huge part of growing up and I feel like I missed out on a lot of that. The past few years I've been at University I've really been trying to sort myself out, basically get to know myself & understand my values and pursue those. I still have some fear and anxiety left over from my childhood, but I'm firmly on the pathway to doing better.
However, I still face issues with my Mom from time to time. She still tries to call almost everyday and manage aspects of my life. For example she'll try to tell me what to eat and tries to get my homework schedule so she can constantly remind me about due dates and stuff. These are things I need to be able to manage myself (and am more than capable of doing so). I am also worried about my little sister who is still in high school (she already has pretty bad social anxiety as a result of this parenting style, doesn't know how to interact with people or manage her own life). I try to set boundaries to explain all of this to her, but she takes any slight criticism as a personal attack and it ends up in a big argument where I have to fight tooth&nail to gain the tiniest sliver of independence. I also try to talk to my Dad about it, but he's a pushover (to put things nicely) and will sometimes sympathize with me, but I know he is never going to impact any meaningful change on this.
I don't want to cut contact as I believe in Honoring thy Father and Mother, and especially for my Dad's sake I want to be a part of their life. Also they are covering about 1/3 of my yearly tuition and I seriously don't want to be ungrateful for this. I guess I'm just looking for any advice on this type of situation.