Full disclosure. I was born in 1990, but I went to school with people born in '89. Naturally I gravitated towards people older than me.
I am willing to admit that I prefer older girls, at least 1-4 years older than me. Call it a big sister complex, but I've always felt most comfortable with older people, which makes me naturally gravitate towards girls born in 1987 - 1990.
But red pill theory mentions that girls, as soon as they hit 30, they would hit the "wall" in which they would drop their party-going ways, and start finding a nice guy to settle down with. They would be able to find a stable source of income while still pursuing their alpha fantasies.
I both understand and hate this reality.
I do not want to date someone who can't relate to me (e.g.: "what's an N64, Phoenix?) but my contemporaries have moved on. I don't give a rat's ass if the girls are older, but I do care if I'm taken care of. In other words: I see stories of nice guys getting screwed over by their crushes.
Since '15, I've swallowed the hard truth that I'm at the position I'm at because of me. I went to the gym, I've gotten in shape. I've read Models and No More Mr. Nice Guy (a friend was very nice to have gifted me the Rational Male trilogy on my birthday). But I wonder if it is all for naught.
I don't just wanna have sex. I want a meaningful relationship. Yes, I've read many a post in this subreddit saying that can't happen, but I still believe it can.
And Yet, judging by conventional wisdom, it can't. I am doomed to an existence where I am consigned to an existence of loneliness, or one of fake affection where I can pretend to relate to a Gen Z child who has nothing in common with me.
I don't know what to live for. I don't want to take my own life, but I feel likje it's been wasted.
TL;DR: 28 year old realises his friends are going to turn 30, including the girls he's into, which means they're all going to hi the wall. WTF do I do?