I went out on a date a couple weeks ago and it went well for the most part. Made out and had a lot of fun. I know it isn’t a big deal for you guys but it’s been awhile since I kissed a girl. We took it back to my apartment and since I’m pretty inexperienced I had no clue what to do. We were making out in my bed and I tried pulling her pants down and she didn’t want that. So after 10 min of more making out I tried fingering her and she pulled my hand away. Ok she doesn’t wanna fuck so I stopped. Later when I asked her out for a 2nd date she says she doesn’t like how I touched on her and we should just be friends.

Ngl I’ve had bad oneitis over her for awhile now, but recently I found out that there’s a video going around of her and some frat boys. Lol. She didn’t like me escalating while on top of me in my bed but she’s ok with getting rammed on camera? Why am I still holding on to this blue pill fantasy, someone please snap me out of it. I can’t keep living my life like this