Feeling pretty fucking depressed over the last 3 weeks. Not cause of a girl or cause I had a job interview fail. Nah. Just that existential sort of shit creeping in. I'm fit and healthy cause I lift daily and shit. Like on the surface I am all good man. But inside it's like who gives a fuck. Mom's alcoholic, dad's dead inside, older sibling is fucked in the head and I don't like him, friends I once had moved away.

I tried that depression sub but everyone there seems heavily on that victim mindset but I am not. Like I wanna do better man, I want to self congratulate myself and be solid in my frame but lately it's just a big drag as if I am not sure why or who this is for.

morning time is this heaviness of "fuck.. again".

I just got no one to bounce this off of. My network irl is non existent.

Edit - Ok I got more of a reaction than I expected. Will reply to stuff now (morning after). Thanks everyone. Edit #2 - this is all so unexpectedly wholesome. I got lots of shit to read and watch now cheers everyone.