At what point should you take a girl losing interest as "forces outside of your control"?

January 31, 2019
6 upvotes

As many of us do, we tend to be hard on ourselves when a girl loses interest and receive it as a sign of personal inadequacy -- which could stem from self-awareness of mistakes such as with bad game (which we can learn from and recalibrate) or something deeper such as lack of self-confidence.

In a world where men are constantly being judged, qualified and tested by women (many would argue these tests are subconsciously done, and thus women are blissfully unaware), at what point do we stop blaming ourselves for one-sided disinterest (or evidence of declining interest)? How do we deal with the frustration of it all and not become butt-hurt or jaded?

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Post Information
Title At what point should you take a girl losing interest as "forces outside of your control"?
Author KillaJewels
Upvotes 6
Comments 11
Date January 31, 2019 2:48 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit /r/askTRP
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/at-what-point-should-you-take-a-girl-losing.210692
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/alq5ay/at_what_point_should_you_take_a_girl_losing/
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Comments

[–]Sin-Silver8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Consider this, you are NEVER in control of what a girl thinks. There may be a time were you get a girl to be intrested in you, but her own past and other forces will always play a large, if not larger role.

You need to internalise abundance mentality. When you stop caring about wether a girl likes you if not, then you’ll start being more confident, and having more success.

[–]goblinboglin4 points5 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

By having abundance mentality.

Once you have it, you don't really care about women's bullshit.

You know that you can walk away whenever you want and get a new one.

[–]KillaJewels[S] 1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

In theory that sounds great for single dudes. What about a guy in a monogamous relationship?

[–]goblinboglin7 points8 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

It means not being afraid to leave her anytime.

It applies to guys in relationship as well.

Being in relationship doesn't mean having to take shit indefinitely or until you get broken.

[–]KillaJewels[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

You're right. And I've learned recently that, if your gut is telling you something is wrong, there is.

How do you know when to cut your losses and disengage though? If her interest starts to dwindle (and you feel it), do you try and work things out or just say "fuck it" and cut her off?

[–]goblinboglin6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Yes, you just cut things off, slowly disengage, get busy, basically ignore and fade away, either soft or hard (called next)

It's usually not worth the time and drama to work things out and the fact is that once you have problems with her you will always have. People don't change.

[–]KillaJewels[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Gonna give this a real shot next go around. Thanks boss.

[–]goblinboglin0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Good luck mate, hope it works for you.

[–]btrpb0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

If she's losing interest in you, you can be a thirsty beta, profess how she is your whole life, buy her flowers...

Or accept the facts, make the first move and fucking leave, and get the fuck out there and find a new pussy.

[–]maljo240 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

You never own a woman, you just get a turn between her legs of variable duration. When you car wears out you buy a new car.

[–]KillaJewels[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I hear this a lot here, but I don’t buy that. It’s a limiting belief. How can any man have a healthy monogamous relationship or marriage with that mindset?

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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