Average women are harder to date than beautiful women.

October 18, 2018

Over the past few years I’ve been noticing that average women are way harder to date than beautiful women. All of the beautiful women I’ve dated have very rarely “played hard to get”,have made me do minimal “chasing”,communicate better,and have no problem buying me things or paying for dates.

Average women on the other hand more often play mind games,text back slower,flake more often,or just straight up blow me off more often than beautiful women.

Anyone else experience this?

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Post Information
Title Average women are harder to date than beautiful women.
Author m03svt
Upvotes 176
Comments 66
Date October 18, 2018 4:48 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit /r/askTRP
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/average-women-are-harder-to-date-than-beautiful.135011
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/9p636d/average_women_are_harder_to_date_than_beautiful/
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[–]Metalgear222122 points123 points  (16 children) | Copy Link

As someone who exclusively cold approaches the hottest girls I can find, it’s actually the opposite. Average girls that I plate are almost always looking to meet with me on weekends whereas the hot ones are damn near impossible to schedule a meet up that they don’t flake on. The notion that hot girls don’t get approached as much as average girls is just plain BS. It happens ALL the time. Bar, club, or gym; it’s all the same. Go out and observe.

[–]TheRedPillMonkey53 points54 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This. Not only do they get approached more, they get observed more. Walk down a busy street with an hb9 then with an hb6. You can see every guy checking out that hb9 and far fewer the hb6.

The hb9 knows it too.

[–]Original_Dankster39 points40 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

The hot woman knows she's hot. She doesn't need to test you for your interest, she knows she has your interest.

But what if the average woman is always asking herself "is he in to me" and needs to shit test and comfort test to assuage her fragile ego?

Just a hypothesis.

[–]Metalgear22224 points25 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

It’s all relative to SMV, I’m still in my journey to improve mine. this is why I plate average girls with ease but it’s still a challenge to plate hot ones. I’ve had a few hot plates but they crashed much faster than my average ones. Average ones will be with me til I drop them (1-2 years), hot ones are with me for 1-3 months.

If you’re high enough SMV, the hot ones start asking that exact question too. She doesnt know if she has your interest or if she does, she’s worried about others that might be better than her. Which is the exact same thing average girls do.

No matter how many paths and ideas there are from TRP, they always end up in the same place;

Do whatever it takes to raise your SMV and never stop elevating the bar.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Seems like the hot ones are looking to move into LTR's and if you deny that, they know they have enough other options to find those bux they are looking for.

I hope the very best for your future growth, you have given very solid answers for this question.

[–]lovs2spuge10 points11 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

The average looking ones always want to seem to date exclusively date a week after you’ve known them or fucked. I.e the “beta” of females.

[–]AdamNJH3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

The average girls have no other options, and make that obvious.

[–]capecodchips5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

? Average girls have unlimited options

[–]AdamNJH4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

  • no other good quality options. Guys below her SMV do not exist in her eyes.

[–]Morphs_1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Then you're doing something wrong. Either the sex isn't stellar, you didn't have a proper The Talk with her, or your SMV is too low.

If your value is high and your frame is strong, she will accept that you date multiple women and is happy to have a piece.

[–]lovs2spuge0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

The two are not mutually exclusive..some of them have stuck around and have continued to be FWB while others are so dead set on finding a boyfriend as if their wedding is tomorrow that they taper off.

[–]DillonDockery23 points24 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes, exactly this. All these people agreeing that average women are harder to date and get approached less than HB8+ is probably the most ridiculous thing I've seen on this sub.

One of my previous HB8+ plates would make it a point to tell me about all the guys that hit on her (dread game). On her way up to my apartment she told me how a group of guys invited her up to a party while she was in the elevator....I told her she should have went.

[–]dtyler863 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I agree.

[–]VasiliyZaitzev2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Congrats, you have high SMV.

[–]OfficerWade1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Reminds me of the song:” if you want to be happy for the rest of your life never make a pretty women your wife, so from my point of view, get an ugly women to marry you”

[–]VoidInvincible0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I usually agree with you on things but I just can't here. Maybe a hot girl to you is different to me, but it seems to me that average chicks get approached more. If you are correct and 9's do get approached much more than 5's, well then that means more men have bigger balls than I thought. I just think men have an easier time approaching average chicks over hotter ones. Too many men are afraid of getting rejected by a hot girl for them to be getting approached 24/7.

[–]TheKrazyKitten216 points217 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

Average woman are approached more, therefore lots have developed an ego

[–]CookieAdmiral41 points42 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

This is the correct answer and further explanation is not necessary.

[–]UncleChido6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

This is a good answer and further comments are not necessary.

[–]friendandadvisor2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is the best answer and further discussion is not necessary.

[–]Kalepsis4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link


[–]VoidInvincible0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Took my comment right out of my fingers. This is the correct answer, I don't care what anybody says about hotter women being approached a lot more, it's not true, generally.

[–]OfficerWade-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Some would say normal development of the self, we’re only victims if we want to be.

[–]redhawkes54 points55 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

The core thing here is the fragile ego.

Pretty chicks don't need validation thru playing hard to get and power plays. They know they are attractive.

On the other hand, the average hoe are more insecure and in need of constant validation. Also, they are the ones who are pumped and dumped the most.

The biggest part of the problem are the thirsty chumps pumping their egos thru social media validation and orbiting thinking they are easier than the attractive chicks. Average broads know that deep inside, hence they use those tactics to appear high value.

[–][deleted] 19 points20 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Had a friend in college who had a bad ass HB9 cousin. the same age. She lived in another state but met her once on a visit. My friend told me she confessed that she spent a lot of Sat nights alone because she didn’t get asked out as much as her less attractive friends. Just one example but definitely an inside look

[–]markinsinz78 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Tell her to hop on tinder and see how many chads line up

[–]Mr-Ed20931 points32 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

You guys really don't think 8+ chicks are getting approached as much??

The main difference between men and women, is that women know their value. They are reminded of it daily when men check them out in the street, through their matches on tinder. And mainly through a society that encourages women to develop unhealthy neuroticism regarding how they think people should treat them. For men you actually have to put yourself out there and risk rejection to get any real semblance of what your value is.

It really doesn't take much to make a girl hot enough to be at a standard that most men would happily date her. Grow your hair out, appear to have clear skin and most importantly, just be slim. It's such a low physical barrier compared to men and yet most women completely miss the mark. The women who aren't at that standard know it and they know men will be looking for someone that is. So lazy average girls tend to either sleep around a lot, getting their validation from easy lays and avoiding the bad feelings that come with getting attached to a guy who doesn't want to commit to them. Or they get bitter and get their kicks from pre-emptively rejecting guys who they know objectively are better than them.

For hot girls who are more secure in their value, they are happy to be approached and they know how to deal with it. Even if they're not interested they can respect guys who make the effort and more politely let people down.

[–]XXXNINETACION 1 points [recovered]  (2 children) | Copy Link

Grow your hair out

Receding hairline gang checking in

[–]Mr-Ed2091 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

take your neuroticism elsewhere mate

[–]ac714-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Hey, take your lack of constructive criticism and get out

[–]Pork_Sword368 points69 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

That’s because average woman are approached more often than beautiful women. Therefore the average woman has had a more constant supply of validation and beta orbiters around her which boosts her ego into her mind thinking she is a 10 when in fact she is a 5. The beautiful woman however is approached by far less guys because there are too many pussies who think a woman is out of their league and fear rejection, therefore it’s a time waste to approach such a good looking girl. Because of this reason, the beautiful women doesn’t suffer from an over inflated ego unlike the average broad. This is the reason I believe the Red Pill advocates cold approaching 8s 9s and 10s whenever possible.

[–]expatriate779 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Agree with you except in one regard, and that’s social media.

HB9-10 often get SWARMED on social media, thereby obtaining their validation through these means, even if they aren’t getting approached in person.

In other words, average women may get physically approached more, yet hot women can easily attain validation through alternative means when not being approached.

So imo it’s a case-by-case basis.

[–]Pooddit48 points49 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

My differing opinion is that average women are rife with mental illness. A woman who cares how they present themselves, by having good social skills, taking care of her health and appearance, etc., tend to be more mentally stable.

[–]sehns11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Agreed. But it can also skew that way with beautiful women also who take things too far. Excessive cosmetic surgery, etc.

[–]hamagiclamp13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

There are mental stable woman?

[–]Velebit6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah. So many women and people in general are mentally ill.

[–]gbnz8713 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes and no. I have come across highly attractive girls that are nice as pie and I can read them like a book and I've come across nasty women who roll their eyes and pretend I am invisible half way through a conversation. I have had average girls who are really nice to me and I have some that look insulted that I am even sharing air with them.

Its really hard for me to put a blanket statement across women from my experience. My mood, her mood, the weather, the time of day, if shes had a coffee, if shes had a bad day at work etc..etc.. can change things completely. Everyone's different with their own little quirks and mannerisms.

[–]helaughsinhidden7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I have a theory that the worst thing a woman can be is to be almost smoking hot. Those women are never happy with their looks, they are the most insecure, and never stop seeking validation.

[–]Psychological_Radish5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I agree that it is all relative to your SMVs. The problem is that most guys undervalue themselves, although sometimes they go the opposite direction.

1-2 points above her SMV The ideal spot for a relationship. Shit testing will be minimal here. She'll comfort test more often, but she sees you as attainable, so she won't feel too insecure. Better girls will work to keep your attention and demonstrate value outside looks alone. She isn't hot enough to attract higher value men, so temptation remains low as long as you keep Frame and maintain SMV.

Equal SMV Now you're gambling a little bit more. You're still better than most of her options, but it wouldn't be difficult to replace you. Shit testing will come more frequently. Eventually you will surpass her SMV as you both grow older, and things will settle into a better equilibrium - if you make it that far.

3 or more points above her SMV Unbalanced relationship. She knows she's beneath you, so she will constantly question if you're actually attainable for long-term commitment. This is where you see a lot of manipulative, insecurity-driven behavior. Play around with these girls if you wish, but for the sake of your own reputation, don't do it often. Seeking out lesser partners is a Beta tell for women.

1 or more points below her SMV Unbalanced relationship. No matter how tight your Game is, the illusion can't be kept up forever without drastic improvement of your own SMV relative to hers. Both of you know that you're easily replaceable and she isn't. Therefore, she won't feel motivated to impress you beyond her physical beauty. Shit testing will be a fact of your everyday existence, wearing down all but the hardest of men. Better prospects than you will make a go at her, so hypergamous temptation and doubt will always be present. Very hot women (relative to you) should be reserved for short-term flings and more casual relationships.

[–]lakazepo2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I was agreeing with this but I just realized, the women that treat me the best are closer to average. I dont recognize myself as attractive but women have said I'm above average, a 7 usually. I think if you date down then there's a loophole to this. Probably not with online dating but fuck online dating.

[–]spiritletshereit4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Just out of curiosity, when are you ever in a situation where a woman is rating you out of 10?

[–]lakazepo0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Friends or women I've been involved with. I'm a pretty blunt and honest person so I feel they vibe with it when they talk to me and feel they can talk freely.

[–]exit_sandman3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

There could be a multitude of possible reasons, but I go with the following:

A pretty girl is more likely to have a positive disposition: when she's into a guy, she usually can assume that the feeling is mutual; and she is less likely to have extensive experiences of being pumped and dumped. She doesn't have to reframe things that go south as sour grapes; and doesn't have to suspect that guys showing an interest in her are actually after a prettier friend of theirs.

[–]red_matrix3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Average women have lots of options as they’re in multiple dating apps and I believe hook up a lot! I also think attractive women know their worth, don’t go on apps as often, don’t get approached as much - but, they also know what they are worth and are used to getting what they want. They know they have options and they will shit test very hard.

[–]throwitdownman7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Simple. It’s because the ‘beautiful women’ you are talking about are on the CC, and is proud to be on the CC. Hence, they know what’re an approach is going, they know how guys are, and they understand their need for cock.

Average women are unaware of hypergamy, and as such will undergo mental gymnastics to validate their CC rides, and preserve their ‘pure’ identity by playing games. Also, it gives them the moral high ground to slut-shame the beautiful women who are overt.

[–]UpperRedSide-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

and is proud to be on the CC.

Are proud.

[–]boy_named_su2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Are you mostly online dating? I've noticed the smokeshows online tend to be absolute nutters compared to offline .

[–]Morphs_2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This makes perfect sense. On tinder EVERY dude will swipe right on a 9 or 10. But offline a lot of guys will be too scared to approach the 9 or 10 in the club. This depends on where you live btw, in some places and cultures guys approach like crazy, in other places guys just don't do much.

[–]wiffofass 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy Link

Maybe I'm delusional but in my case I think my SMV is too high for average women (perfectly groomed bodybuilder, I dress nice, tan, nice teeth, nice face etc) and they are either intimidated or not sure what. They don't flirt back and are serious as fuck like I'm interrogating them. The really hot ones know what's up, giggle and tease me back. Sometimes I still go for the contact even though I see that it's not "on" and the average ones simply reject me. Leaves me speechless every time because I usually approach them when there's nothing better around or I haven't worked up the courage to go for the hottest ones. IDK maybe it's as the other comment says and their egos are bigger. I find it hard to believe.

[–]Morphs_0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

They probably know what's up. They know you're out of their league. So you have "fuckboy" written all over you, to them. They are unsure and they know they are not able to betabucks you.

Try a little nice-guy vibe with those average women. No flirting but more situational talk. Take the spotlight off yourself and her for a bit to let her know you're also just a guy. Maybe you're too perfect to them so they're not buying it.

[–]lordkingalpha10 points11 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

What these guys up here said. Cold approach is better irl with 8s ,9s and 10s. Because there's less dudes who have balls to go up too them. Now places like tinder are similar average girls on there are spam with dicks so there ego is high as fuck as well and most 8s and above are not on it. But there are some 8s and 9s on tinder if you're are attractive. I'm talking to a 8 on tinder today gave me some shit tests but I passed like a fucking g and showed her I anit no bitch same rules apply in cold approach don't be a bitch. Only 8s and above my friend!

[–]TheIslander8298 points9 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Because there's less dudes


[–]lordkingalpha5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I'm gonna fuck your gf

[–]TheIslander8295 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You're more than welcome to fuck any of the plates in my rotation.

I don't have a gf, that shit is for suckers.

[–]Red-Lantern2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Great reply.

[–]ShotgunTRP1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

A Lot of people are parroting similar lines but I’ve got a different take on it

Average girls have been “pumped and dumped” more than the hot ones so vet harder for men who are more interested to go through the hoops and processes.

Hotter women have guys who would cut a nutsack for a daily sniff of the Pussy so are more relaxed with the vetting process knowing they have more power to get a relationship if they choose

[–]Big_Daddy_PDX1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Average girls don’t get that many opportunities; so when an opportunity presents, they need to doh lie and triple verify that they aren’t being tricked.

Hot chicks get hit on more times before they arrive at work on Monday than average chicks will get hit on all month. It’s fact. The only way to get their attention (beyond the obvious) is to give them something they don’t have or to reduce the friction in their life that makes it logical to be with you.

[–]michaelburke340 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

personally i have not really experienced this, although i can believe that a lot of average looking woman would be like this, i think this is because an average looking chick can gain a pretty big following on instagram or likes on tinder if they post slutty pictures of themselves, which gives them an inflated sense of value. Obviously the beautiful girl could do this too but i think that the beautiful girl knows that she is beautiful and doesn’t need the verification thus she has a more realistic sense of her worth to men. but that’s just my assumption

[–]ikeurbantraut0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

If they (think) they are below you, they go out of their way to make you happy. Otherwise, I agree

[–]VoidInvincible0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes they are. They have to compensate for being average by being total bitches. (The logic there astounds me.) 9's and 10's are generally (not always) pretty sweet, even when just being approached: Average women are approached more, hotter women are not approached as much, I don't care what anyone says. Thus average women have major attitude problems and bitch shields, where hotter women are more friendly.

[–]dr_warlock[🍰] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I have the complete opposite experience. Hot women play constant mind games. Big fragile egos and insecure.

[–]kalisto30100 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

OMG I'm not the only one. This is sooo true. If I'm out, and try to approach the 7 she will turn me down. However, If I approach the 9 I tend to have a much better rapport and reciprocity. It's the anxiety of the 9's that challenges me. There have been times where I was fucking one of the 9's and just thought to myself (This is unfucking believable) was turned down by the average 6 last week now I'm nailing the 9 from work.

[–]Locogooner-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If you actually believe that, it's pretty obvious that you don't actually date really hot women.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I believe if you can plate 8's it is difficult for that not to give off a bad vibe towards lesser women.

I tend to be genuine in my approach, average girls can sense my total lack of interest in them and that makes it almost impossible for us to start off on a good footing.

My addiction to reddit women based subs isn't helping either. I see incredibly well built females choking on cocks and taking off everything, begging to be taken all the time.

I guess this in my mind keeps my mind sharp and aimed at the top where I want it to be. That sort of over saturation lowers the value of even high 7s you might see around downtown.

[–]LightSkinKen-2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

The average girl is harder to date because she has a better chance in actually being able to take care of herself, Without a man . Meaning this holds you accountable for bringing value. The hot girls are predictable Because most are chasing the same dream. “ let’s see how far this gets me” 2 completely different frames.

[–]m03svt[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is the dumbest thing I’ve ever read

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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