Throwaway.

I lurked as an anon. Read the sidebar, and saw what I liked. Everything made sense. I was more of a "natural" than most guys that might have stumbled upon TRP, but even still, it clarified what I already knew. I can only ask this question from a "Rep Pill" perspective so to speak, as no other subreddit would be able to digest the nature of my question in an objective manner due to the "triggering" nature of its content.

Earlier today me and my LTR were hanging out, and she showed me a post that a woman put on Facebook.

"Why is it that men nowadays only want to have Friends with benefits???"

My LTR said that she thinks it's because everyone goes through phases and that it depends on your state of mind and your maturity level. She then asked me if she was right.

My assertion was that in this dating climate, any woman that has previously had "flings" or FWBs, can't complain about other men wanting more of the same because that woman is perpetuating the cycle - I.E. I said that it was hypocritical for the woman condemn behavior that she herself engaged in.

My LTR asked me to explain.

I put it as simply as I could - "The only reason she is bitter about it is because that she didn't get commitment out of the guy that she wanted. Since she didn't seek commitment with any FWBs that she had before, she didn't care if they wanted more out of her or not."

She then nodded as if she understood, and asked me if during the time that me and her were in the "dating phase" [read: "hooking up long before commitment" phase] if I was seeing any other women.

I told her honestly that yes - at that time I was still hooking up with two other women off and on.

She acted disgusted and repulsed by the information and claimed that what I did was "wrong."

I didn't see how I was wrong - I told her that during her "fling" phase with any other guy, that she would have either told the man upfront that she wasn't looking for anything serious, or that she would have never asked them if they were seeing other women at the time because she was still flirting with other guys and didn't care about what they were doing.

My LTR things that it's different because it was "clear" to her, but I kept telling her that the only reason it was clear was because she didn't care, and that since she started falling for me, she naturally cut off every other guy without me telling her to because she wanted my commitment and that she operated out of an assumption.

How many women time and time again explicitly state to every guy that she is dating that "hey by the way, I am still hooking up with 'Guy A' sometimes. I may or may not stop depending on how much I like you - is that okay?"

Yet as we know, that is exactly happens.

The people that are hurt do it themselves - they assume that everyone they are interested in are in turn interested in them back and, here's the kicker, they assume that the party that they are interested in are dropping people out of their rotation just like they are - thus they look for any sign from the other party to confirm their exclusivity bias.

In the middle of the conversation, when I realized that me and my LTR weren't going to come to an understanding, I dropped it.

I should have known better than to ask a woman this question upfront - as if she would give me the truth.

So, what do you guys think?

Women that invest more will always want to seek an LTR, right? So inevitably they will get hurt when they find out that the man that they are invested in simply added them to their rotation - yet when they aren't invested in a man they don't care if he put them in their rotation or not.

Yet women, even the "best" of them, shame men for behavior that they subconsciously do.