tldr; had a great ltr after going into the LTR, had to break up with her due to work and moving locations felt terrible, turned blue pilled again and got into a BPD relationship, just ended it

​

If you want more detail on the synopsis, essentially been dating a girl for the past 6 months that have corrupted me internally. Nuclear fights, getting mad about things like working late/hanging with friends, and always have something to fix.

​

Obviously, I fell in love and tried to always keep it together. But, finally tonight I stood my ground again and broke up.

​

How do you get over the feeling that I was possibly as shitty as she said? Sure, I don't do whatever I"m told and like to live my own life, but she made me think I was just scum of a human. Is that typical when dating a BPD? How do I not just sit here and think I could have done it better?

​

In a tough spot, happy to provide more detail if you have specific questions that can help me rationalize.