How many texts do you usually send before you ask someone to hang out on dating apps? What about number as well?

hellionmma · 2020-05-28T06:38:10+00:00

This is such a stupid question. As with anything there’s no set # or steps to take to get a girl out. Go with the flow. Each message should only be sent if it serves a purpose (either moving towards getting a number or building comfort, rapport, etc).

Get their number before moving to a date (Ben Franklin effect & helps distinguish you from the other hundreds of messages she gets).

Finally, don’t be a pen pal. Use your head and don’t save your good stories and what not for in person where you can actually work her

SavorThePill · 2020-05-28T08:32:11+00:00

I haven't really done the app thing for a while, but I'll give a rundown of how my process use to go.

First, I'd reach out and find some random convo to be had. I'd keep the mood light and most importantly, enjoyable. You don't have to be goofy, or funny, or really act in a specific way to get results, but you must keep the atmosphere engaging enough to warrant her continued involvement. This initial back and forth shouldn't go for more than an hour or two (I know, probably sounds ridiculous to some, but messaging can take a long time and hey, I use to really pique their curiosity).

At the end of the first convo, I'd almost always get their number. If acquiring the number is unsuccessful, I'd try one or two more times to get their number. If the second convo goes nowhere, it's pretty much a next unless you feel the vibe is good enough to ride into one final hail mary in a third convo later. If the third try doesn't work, I think you're deluding yourself. Not getting the number the first time is already a less than favorable indication of the relational context.

After the getting the number, I'd follow up immediately and identify myself. Right there is when I would do one of two things: assert the premise or set up the meeting time. With asserting the premise, I'd either get a nude or flirt a bit. After either of those, setting up the meet in the next convo is easy because you've already overtly stimulated the sexual climate.

Once you do it enough times, it becomes somewhat routine. You'll definitely get curve balls (shit tests and whatnot), but the same set of operations will generally bear out.

I think finding a happy medium in how much to say is key. You could be sparse and try to say as little as possible, but you need to be pretty damn high up in the looks department to pull that off. If you say too much and beat around the bush, she'll lose interest fast. u/hellionmma is right that each message, each piece of communication, should contribute to moving you closer to a milestone. Don't let a good vibe go to waste: number close and set up meetings when you've warmed them up, because women change their minds fairly quickly and are turned off by a lack of action.

power_cleaner · 2020-05-28T07:34:14+00:00

[deleted]

TheStumblingWolf · 2020-05-28T08:06:06+00:00

Establish some sort of rapport, then do it when it feels right. People aren't robots. You can't do this "if x, then y" type of stuff.

itiswr1tten · 2020-05-28T07:11:55+00:00

Several hundred.

Title	How many texts do you usually send before you ask someone to hang out on dating apps? What about number as well?
Author	power_cleaner
Upvotes	0
Comments	18
Date	May 28, 2020 6:30 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/gs0ykj/how_many_texts_do_you_usually_send_before_you_ask/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-many-texts-do-you-usually-send-before-you-ask.667911 https://theredarchive.com/post/667911