So the moral of this story is always trust your gut.

My ltr was over last night and we had been chatting and having a normal date with some food. We got into a jokey conversation about texting and i said ‘you’re always online when i click to message you’. She laughed and threw the same back at me. I said ‘i’m checking in with my bros but god knows who you are speaking to’. She looked uncomfortable and i said ‘that look said it all’ but still playful.

She said just my work buddies usually. I asked ‘oh thats right you’re in a group?’ .. she said in a group and all sorts of chat’ -

I said that the last few weeks every time i go on to message shes online so i said jokingly ‘ its better to be honest if you’re texting guys you know’ and then she said ‘well i’ve been chatting a lot with Bob’ this is the coworker she told me was good looking and clearly fancies.

I got more serious ‘just about work stuff?’..

‘No i’m helping him with his dating life too’

I was tempted to ask to see her phone but reconsidered.

I had heard enough. I said ‘ok, will you do something for me?’

‘Sure’

‘Go and get your stuff together. I’m done’

She sort of looked shocked but said ‘what do you mean?’

I said ‘get your stuff packed - you’re going home in 5 minutes and we’re done’

She asked was i serious. I said ‘look at me when i say this. Get your stuff together and when i drop you home don’t contact me again’

She said ‘why? Whats the big deal?’

I said ‘ if was only a few weeks ago i’d set boundaries about texting other guys. Now you can do what you want and its your life but you’ve decided that doing that is more important than this relationship and my boundaries. I’m worth more than that’

A few other skirmishes took place and It took me around 30 minutes to get her on her way home. I just said bye and drove off.

I’m feeling like shit and hurt as i had oneitis for this chick but theres a small part of me that feels euphoric. I feel like i’ve stood up to my demons and i’m reminding myself that a) i’ve valued and chosen myself and thats something i wont compromise with EVER. 2. She broke my rules and was monkey branching so it would never have worked anyway.

Any thoughts?