I think overall, the red pill has helped me. At the very least, I’m happier than I was before. I used to want marriage. That was my life long goal. Everything I did or didn’t do in life was centered around being married someday. I stopped smoking weed because “women don’t like lazy stoners.” I put some effort into nofap, into not watching porn, but only because “someday I want to find a wife and she won’t like that I watch porn.” I bought into feminism and liberal politics, because that’s what most women say they like.

So of course, when I started reading the side bar, my first thought was “what do I enjoy doing?”. I discovered I love hiking, mountain biking, archery, bowhunting, camping, fishing, mudding, etc. basically redneck shit. I love it.

I see a lot of comments & posts on here and the main TRP sub that heavily recommend nofap, and advise against smoking weed. My question is: why? I’m serious, please convince me. I understand that y’all are probably right about that, but I need more motivation than that to actually put real effort into that. Why should I care? I still go out and do all the fun redneck shit I enjoy while I’m stoned. I’m not a typical lazy stoner that sits around the house all day playing video games and jacking off to porn. I use weed to help me enjoy being outdoors even more than I already do. I love the feeling I get from waking up early as hell to hike to the top of a mountain just so I can get high and watch the sunrise. I have Tourette Syndrome, so weed is what helps me sit still and be quiet for hours on end while I wait in the grass for a really good size tom (adult male turkey, for all you non hunters) to show up. I love the adrenaline rush I get from shooting one and the feeling of accomplishment from bringing home my own dinner. I already enjoyed all that, but weed makes it 1000x better.

As far as porn and masturbation is concerned, I just don’t see the point to stopping. It’s probably not good for me, but I’m not motivated enough to stop. I don’t want to. Every time I try, I can barely go a week before I look at porn again. I’ve sought out help with SAA, and I was told I don’t take it seriously enough. They’re right! I don’t want to stop. I don’t have a good enough reason to. I know that this is a very MGTOW mindset, but honestly it’s so much easier than all the bullshit I have to go through just to stick my dick in a wet hole. I know it’s an addiction, but if I tried to stop, it’s an addiction I’d have to fight every single day for the rest of my life. I’d have to consciously choose, every day, to not watch porn and to not jack off. I’d have to suffer through literal withdrawals for god knows how long, and for what? So I can maybe have a slightly easier time getting pussy? “It’s so beta to watch another man get what you want.” Well lesbian porn is a thing.

I’ve accepted the fact that I’ll never get to be married. At least not the way I wanted it. If AWALT is true, then marriage is the last thing I want. Hell, just being in a relationship is the last thing I want. Chasing that has made me miserable and even though I was in a few LTRs, they always ended with me being hurt, depressed, and suicidal. Casual sex is kinda fun, but doesn’t make me feel any better. Porn is easier. Why should I stop?