To make a long story shot. When I(26M) lived in Manhattan. I meet this girl(26F) HB8-9 in my book off hinge in late 2019. She was smart, beautiful and went IVY league school. Also we where both the same religion(Jewish). She checked off all the boxes I wanted in a woman. We hit it off great made out like long lost lovers on our first date. We dated and hooked up for another month. I admit I acted totally blue pill with her and began operating in her frame. About a month and a half in. She got very busy out of nowhere. She then kept canceling dates on me becoming very flaky. Just when I thought everything was done she would re-initiate conversation texting . After not seeing each other for like three weeks she flakes on another date with me. Saying something bad happened. I asked if everything was okay and she told me “not now”. The next day she told me to move on and I did.
In between then I probably hooked up and had sex with 4 different girls none of them lit the same flame that she did inside me. I got into a relationship with one of the girls(24f). She was pretty cute and very sweet I have nothing bad to say about her. It was nice having someone to go to dinner with and sleep with. But I wasn’t that into her that flame for me was missing. About 3 months i told this girl I couldn’t see it working out. She was upset but said she understood. She told me she felt like I wasn’t putting any effort into the relationship and she said I was distant at times.
Then a few weeks later. Out of the blue after not talking for a few months. That girl who told me to move on reached out to me. She said she was really sorry and she made a huge mistake. I told her she did nothing wrong. She said she she just got into PA school. I told her we should get dinner and celebrate. Later on that week I took her to a nice sushi place in Greenwich Village. It was nice catching up with her I was like a little puppy dog. I wasn’t that excited to see a girl in such a long time. She obviously at dinner Talked about herself the entire time. Never, asked anything me about going on in my life. Her and her roommate we’re getting separate apartments. After being together for many years including in the sorority in college.
After dinner I walked her around Union Square in Greenwich Village looking at apartment buildings with her. I told her I was looking for my own place due to get out and away from my brother.(Not entirely true I still had four months left on my lease.) She mentioned she had a boyfriend who went to Sophie Davis medical school and it was so far. She said hopefully I wouldn’t move so far. It Took me back for a sec when she said that but I didn’t think anything of it when she mentioned her ex. We kissed goodbye and from then She began texting and talking to me a lot more. She was texting me every day showing me stuff for her new apartment she got that her dad was paying 3500 a month for. Like a total simp always being I told her I would help her set it up.
We hung out the next week we got food at a diner. She went somewhere before with her college sorority friends and told me she would meet me there. When I meet here she showed up high as a kite off weed. The dinner was short to say the least. It got interpreted by teens who crashed the diner and made a scene made the whole thing awkward. Anyway it ended I got her an Uber back and we kiss goodbye told me she would text me later. Never hear back from her after that. I knew she was going on a family vacation for a week so I didn’t wanna bother her. She completely ghosted me I figured at this point after not hearing for her for two weeks.
I know this isn’t healthy but I did some social media stocking on her because she never added me any everything. I found out the Sophie Davis kid was her boyfriend in between when I first dated her for the month and half and when she reached out to me saying she made a huge mistake. I felt the rage I’ve never felt before in my life. Another idiotic go by me I texted her freaking out about it even though she hasn’t reached out to me in 2 weeks a this point. She didn’t even explain herself on what she did. She just called me a Psychopath and blocked my number.
Right after that Covid came in my life will change dramatically. I would leave Manhattan and move back to my parents house in the suburbs. I would get laid off from my corporate job in Manhattan due to the real estate market in NYC taking a huge hit. However, I was not gonna sit down and let a virus ruin my life. I am fortunate that my family owns a real estate company that’s very successful. I was supposed to work for them a few years down the road but I guess the pandemic made it sooner.
I’ve been busting my tail working for my father helping with the brokerage business getting new leads and helping with the development part of the company. I built a complete home gym in the basement power rack, heavy dumbbells, anything you think of I got it now. I was working out 5-6x a week Push, Pull and Legs.( side note: of you here need killer a program let me know I got you.) The gym thankfully has been able to keep me sane though all the lunacy of 2020. I also quit smoking pot a big vice of mine for many years. I also started looking at homes out here for me to buy. I don’t know if I wanna move back to the city it might not be the same for a long time.
I am worried though Because sometimes I catch myself thinking about her. I am doing all the right things working on myself. Lifting building my career here working for my family business. Sometimes I slip and I go on tangents thinking about her. It’s really tough. I know girls have alpha windows but she makes me an alpha Groom I guess. With the pandemic I have not dated or talk to any girls. I find dating apps pointless right now other than giving girls free validation. I really don’t know anyone who’s going on dates. I guess part of life is learning from your mistakes and she was one of the biggest ones she was like a drug I still have problems getting over. I’ve dated many girls in the past and had no problems getting over them for some reason she’s got me in a spell. Does anyone have any advice how to get over this severe case of oneitis? Has anyone else had a girl shake them this deep?
TLDR; I have severe case of oneitis for this girl who treated like dog shit. Left me for a another and came back and acted like nothing happened. Ends up pulling same shit on me again. Hooked up with multiple girls in between. Working on myself with lifting and improving career still can’t get over her.