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Massive attention from gays: a good sign?

October 2, 2019

In my first year of Red Pill. Been hitting the gym hard for about 10 months now, I'm definitely muscular but have a way to go and not yet close to a decent body fat %, but I'm happy with my progress and I only see it improving.

I'm a white British guy living in South East Asia. Back home when I was younger and slim I was a very pretty boy, so I'd say I was a decent 7.5 and never had any problems getting laid or finding a gf. As I've got older and my metabolism slowed down, I'm probably around a 6.5 due to fattening face & body as well as receding/thinning hairline. Over here in South East Asia being a white guy bumps you up a level or two.

Lived here for 5 years, always done well getting laid but now I'm into RP philosophy and I'm hitting the gym hard. At the moment I'm focusing on improving my SMV and reading a lot of theory, but I have done little real world practice because I'm saving that for when I've lowered my body fat % and I'm more confident in my gym body.

My situation is this: since I've become RP and become muscular at the gym, I get loads of attention from men. Gay men. In the sauna, in the mall, in the street, in the fucking public bathroom, guys check me out and some even cold approach me. It's not just because I'm a white guy - I'm used to that and got that all the time before - I can tell the difference between a local guy staring at a white guy and a gay man staring at a guy he wants to fuck.

My question is this: is this a good sign? I'm feeling quite frustrated that I'm putting this work in and the improvement in IOIs is coming from gay men. Asian women are even more of the mindset that the man should chase the woman, so perhaps I'm only getting the IOIs from the men because they're more predatory while the women expect me to do all the work. Gay men will always be more blatant and obvious because, well, they're men and that's what men do. Of course if my SMV was high enough I'd get IOIs from women, but I haven't noticed any increase on that side in spite of the massive increase with gay men.

Is the heightened interest from gay men an indicator that I am becoming more attractive to women as well, even if I'm not getting an improvement in IOIs from women?

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Post Information
Title Massive attention from gays: a good sign?
Upvotes 2
Comments 7
Date October 2, 2019 8:41 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit /r/askTRP
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/massive-attention-from-gays-a-good-sign.288218
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/dc7gna/massive_attention_from_gays_a_good_sign/
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[–]thrwy754795 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

It seems like getting attention from girls is your motivation for working out. Not a bad reason to do it, as long as you're improving your fitness. It's undeniable that attention from girls feels good.

However, as you may have realized, it has its limitations in that you're dependent on external factors. Being motivated internally requires only you as the driving force.

What you should try to address is why you are seeking the attention of girls in the first place. This is likely due to a lack, or fear of some sort. Perhaps you're aging, and your fear of death is propelling you to seek girls to invoke the same feelings you had when younger. This is only a guess, and deeply assumptive. You would have to look within to find answers.

Reflecting upon your own behaviours, and the reasons underlying them can help you dismantle, and perhaps change the locus of your motivation.

For working out, perhaps try viewing it as a challenge to achieve the results you want. If you're lifting, set goals in terms of weights, and measure your progress as you improve your strength, and power. Similar methods can be applied to cardio where you can measure how much you do, for how long, and with what level of intensity.

The key is to set goals, and feel good about achieving them, instead of tying the good feelings to attention from girls, which would be a bonus.

[–]MR_SKINNYPENIS69[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

I think you're correct about being dependent on external factors. I've always been a bit of a man whore with women because every woman I sleep with helps nurture my fragile ego and makes me feel like someone of value.

Hitting the gym was definitely motivated 100% by my desire to attract women. Since I started though, I have definitely come to enjoy the targets and challenge and progression that is entirely with me and not about external validation.

Your post is great, thanks for the lengthy response, but I'm not concerned with my gym progression. I'm certain I'm on the right path and am beginning to get the right mindset, even though I still have a lot to learn and a long way to go. I am now addicted to the feeling I get from working out as well as the satisfaction of progressing and going to bed every day knowing I gave it my best shot at the gym. I sleep like a baby now with almost no regrets of how I spent my day, all because of the gym.

Perhaps you're a man who has seen more attention from girls after his gym improvements. If so, when did you start to notice it?

[–]thrwy754790 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I've never experienced being fat, and have been lean for the most part. Yea, attention from gays is common, and, now and then, attention from girls is also there.

I have talked to a few guys that have transformed, and noticed increased attention. From this pic, I would say they've been around 12-19% in terms of body fat percentage.

Also, in Chapter 19 of The Book of Pook, he discusses the effects different weight categories had on the type of attention he received from girls. Being big is important in landing beautiful girls.

[–]javascript_dev2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I notice the same, lifting really increases overt interest from gay guys but any IOIs from girls are still rare. I think with girls you have to have elite looks to get IOIs barring some exceptional circumstance.

[–]MR_SKINNYPENIS69[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

That's my thinking too. Men have lower standards perhaps, I won't get IOIs from women unless I get my physical SMV much higher.

Perhaps I was under the false impression that once I got some good progression at the gym women would start falling at my feet lol

[–]2ComplexProjection1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

That will never happen. Or at least, that won’t happen enough for you to count on it.

Look is an enabler for you to get more confidence, but to get girls you still need to approach, to be witty, to be alpha.

You can be a muscular pussy, that won’t bring in the girls.

[–]MR_SKINNYPENIS69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Truth. Think I needed to hear it from someone else for it to get through. Thanks

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