Need some older male advice here

Luck-67 · 2020-09-08T00:37:35+00:00

Life is a motherfucker and it’s how you grab the ball and run with it. So far, if you’ve gone from poverty to Ivy League you’re on point..... just don’t drop the ball.

Secondly, it sounds like you’re well on your way to being a self made man. You’ll end up smashing all the silver spooned Daddy’s boys in life skills, women , career etc....because you are NOT silver spoon fed. Patience, this will happen.

I repeat, plow forward and don’t drop the fucking ball !

bobbie42069 · 2020-09-08T01:00:46+00:00

A good quote is "Comparison is the thief of happiness." Don't compare yourself to others, compare yourself to who you were yesterday. You got into an ivy league. That's more than many people can say for themselves. You're still super young. You could graduate at 30 and still be ahead of most people. I, like you went to a very good school but I never finished. At first I felt depressed because I was comparing myself to others who finished. That quickly went away once I found my dream job (firefighter) and could care less about my degree. The thing is, people who are achieving their goals are too worried to think about what other people are doing. What are you truly passionate about? What job do you want to get? I'd recommend focusing on that and using your motivation/drive to keep you distracted. I gaurentee you if you aren't motivated about what you're doing then you're doing the wrong thing. Don't worry about when you will finish college. Take your time. Even if it takes an extra year, that is nothing.

Katzenpower · 2020-09-08T02:00:24+00:00

[deleted]

jm51 · 2020-09-08T01:24:36+00:00

There's 'Being in hell' and 'Going through hell'.

Technically, you're in the same place either way but there's a big difference. With the latter, you are travelling. With the former, you are stuck. Keep travelling.

pialox · 2020-09-08T03:45:21+00:00

Systemise everyday mundane things into a calendar. Monday: Laundry and Food shopping Tuesday: Meal prep. Etc etc

Once you have that in place, the stress of time management for things you know you need done goes away. Hell in my poon slaying days I used to schedule my life down to what days I would shave my ball ffs.

Get into a rhythm of routine so your brain is occupied. Then use that extra timeeffectively to create quality time to work on things to better yourself.

Gym. Game Job Side Hustle.

Youre only young and have the rest of your life in front of you and you haven't even passed go.

It took me until I was 33 (I'm 39 now) to find TRP. During that time, left a 7 year relationship with a hambeast, I dropped 25kg, have a notch count in the high 100s (was below 20 before 33yo) had multiple threesomes, scored a job on 6 figures, created 2 side hustles, quick my 6 figure job to focus on one side hustle. Found a low maintenance bi girl who has a higher sex drive than me who I have threesomes with all the time.

By age 39, work about 10 hours a week. Make 6 figures a year, in the top 5% of income earners for my country (Australia) and ride motorbikes in my spare time.

I did that in the space of 5 years while only having the energy of a 30 year old. Imagine what you can do?

Sack up, get some discipline and some systems in place and you will be out of the dark.

Adorable_FecalSpray · 2020-09-08T00:51:00+00:00

Become a Super Villain. Sounds like you’ve had the start of the life for it.

Or... start by reading / listening to Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins. You will be able to relate to the some of stuff he went through.

I’ve had a rough past 15 or so years. Sometimes things get better for a day or week. But typically not longer then that. Then “something” happens. Sure, it sucks sometimes, but that’s life. Life isn’t fair. What matters is what I repeatedly do, whether I am disciplined or not.

Just keep swimming... It may get easier, but maybe not. Doesn’t matter what life does, it matters what you do. What you think, what you make your habits. ... just keep fucking swimming man.

TheBadGoy · 2020-09-08T01:02:29+00:00

Try graduating as soon as possible. You have to realize that whatever your position is, you are still better off than most people. I understand your bitterness but you need look at things from another perspective. Read the gulag archipelago by Solzhenitsyn or the Antihumans by Bacu. There are people that have been tortured and slaughtered with no chance to escape. Strengthen your spirit and your will, never give up.

Gtrplyr3838 · 2020-09-08T01:23:31+00:00

You have to keep pressing forward. Others have had an easier time, but this wasn’t your lot in life. If you have graduated from an Ivy League university, you are off to a great start. Giving up and quitting life is not an option. So much is influenced by having a positive mental attitude. Seek out those who are high achievers and continue to seek to improve yourself. Let go of the ‘woe is me’ mindset because it will only pull you down. Try to make a positive influence on those around you. Attitude is everything.

mortalcoil1 · 2020-09-08T03:53:06+00:00

Delete Facebook(stop comparing yourself to other people), hit the gym, become a lawyer.

HumanSockPuppet · 2020-09-08T15:39:52+00:00

First thing I notice is that you haven't really asked a question.

Your question is implied in the post ("How do I feel better about all the things that have made me feel bad?"), but you don't seem to have a clear-enough grasp of your problems to know how to ask for help, or what kind of help you're looking for.

So, what is your goal? What do you want?

moorekom · 2020-09-08T03:16:47+00:00

OP, don't let perfect be the enemy of good. I understand your desire to do better, but remember how injuries happen in the gym. Life is the same. Do not compare yourself to people who are born with enormous advantages from a very young life. Endure, learn, adapt and become better. Good luck.

fullnam · 2020-09-08T07:44:51+00:00

This post would make a great book. Seriously.

UEMcGill · 2020-09-08T15:14:34+00:00

Older dude here. When I first started working I lived near Princeton. I was a kid from a State school and was kind of in awe of these Ivy League kids. Then I started messing around with the chicks there. You know what I found out? Ivy league bitches are just as crazy and neurotic as state school bitches. They have the same crazy shit going on in their life as those former trailer park chicks I used to bang at State College. It was "My dad got indicted for embezzlement" instead of "My dad got busted in a biker/meth ring"

I'd even venture to say they were more neurotic. Everyone of them was valedictorian/top 10 in her class, but hey that made it super easy to game them because they were all hyper competitive over achievers who love slumming with the public school kids.

"Wow, no ones ever been able to take my dick all the way to the hilt. Good for you!"

What's the moral of the story? From the janitor to the CEO, everyone has problems. How you deal with them is what sets you apart. Jump in that shit and embrace the suck. It's the only way to get past it. Long term? I make it a point to get analytical. I'll let myself feel a little emotion, or even a lot, but then I hunker down and ask myself "What's the real problem here? What do I see as a solution? how do I get through this and make it so it doesn't happen again?"

Then someday maybe you'll be at a big business function and see that Ivy League hottie who purposely tried to gag herself to death on your cock pretending to be some management consultants other half of the power couple.

Aspanu24 · 2020-09-08T02:02:27+00:00

I say this as someone who never had a man in my life, and completely destroyed my life beyond belief. I’ll spare you all the words on the screen but I had a tbi that left me memoryless just two years ago, and that may not be the lowest I’ve been. My advice to you is stop being a bitch and man the fuck up and keep going. That’s what we do as men. Keep kicking ass at life.

dani098 · 2020-09-08T02:51:09+00:00

you need to see if your University officed mental counseling. this is probably your main/ only problem

I did not go to collage untill i was 25, did not graduate till I was 31.... and my grades were shit. lol but 36 now and doing great.

do you have a mountain of debt?

Deltime · 2020-09-08T03:24:43+00:00

First off, don’t kill/harm yourself! You have a lot to live for and can change someone else’s life with your own story of strength and courage. Second, you have proven your toughness making it this far and will surely be able to handle the bs of the corporate world, if you choose that route. You can’t see the light bc you are the damn light. You’re young enough to focus on your passions and go out into the world and be a success! You just have to believe in yourself. Also please do not be afraid to seek counseling for your past traumas. Recommendations coming if you’re open to them.

EventHorizonn · 2020-09-08T05:23:53+00:00

Dude, you are absolutely killing it at life! You obviously did great throughout school and just graduated, time to start finding some degree work relative experience wherever you can, and in 10 years from now, you will be saving money to buy you and your mom a house and possibly helping your sister with some kind of quality of life-saving surgery.

Fuck those privileged peers and fuck suicide! Your privileged peers aren't your problem and you've worked too hard to waste it and your life. Spoiled children are as old as history, nothing new, and nothing you can do about it. Don't worry, in the real world, real see's real, and your resolve and real-life experience will undeniably set you ahead of your privileged peers.

You're about to start the rest of your life with a solid education, extreme work ethic, and extreme self-discipline. You are going to absolutely crush it and be very successful. Just keep going, drop the school books, and start applying to jobs with good experience potential. Forget the pay. You need experience and lots of experience in the beginning of your career will boost you through the rest of it!

entrep4 · 2020-09-08T07:44:14+00:00

There is always someone better than you. Stop comparing yourself to them. Just make sure you do the best YOU can do.

AstuteBlackMan · 2020-09-08T08:13:01+00:00

Not old but going through my own shit.

I say fuck everyone. Make your life your own. One day you just get sick and tired of being sick and tired. Own the situation. Make it out. Get better. Win and dominate

mickenrorty · 2020-09-08T08:23:49+00:00

Never forget the world owes you nothing. Absolutely nothing, actually the world wants to take whatever you do have ... away from you.

But, death is so final whereas life is full of possibilities, and if you find something you enjoy while working hard you’ll pretty much always find the money comes your way with it...

Never forget your roots, as a man in your 20’s that knows the value of hard work to get into Ivy League... you can go a very long way... the degree of your success is really up to your imagination and goals you set.

Do it for you, your family, and the TRP community backing you.

We all want you to succeed

bert_cj · 2020-09-08T12:11:07+00:00

https://youtu.be/Ow1-uj0ToVY

JulianUNE · 2020-09-08T14:44:33+00:00

65 here. Life isn't easy, and things seem to go in cycles. Sometimes you bottom out. Then you have to try a new approach. A lot of success is due to patience and persistence.

Remember: you can't see the future. Opportunities will come along that you can't even imagine, because the world and yourself are constantly changing.

thrwy75479 · 2020-09-08T17:05:46+00:00

if you're going through hell, keep going

Katzenpower · 2020-09-08T17:17:29+00:00

Dude, coming from a fucked up upbringing and growing up dirt poor I relate. I've moved up into social classes where people are born and die in privilege and wealth and it's really hard not to feel like puking by the way they live their life, thinking in any way their position is earned. Since you're in an ivy you'll soon learn, if you havent already that the majority of people in positions of power don't deserve to be where they are.
I'd honestly just advise you to hang around people who make you feel good and have a good hearts. Don't get poisoned by snakes. Godspeed!

Rimefang · 2020-09-08T06:15:49+00:00

Mental issues, hm? Story time.

My dad was a skinny nobody with no english who came out of nowhere from Mexico with nothing to his name. Married my mom. Whatever job he had, he strived to be as indispensable as possible. Eventually over the years, he did. He worked out alot, and even built himself up like Arnold Schwarzenegger. He even got a great amount of women. I even used to see pictures of women on his flip phone, numbers in his car, and viagra in his glove box. Trust me, this will all be relevant in a bit.

Anyways, my dad was my hero, however the big narcissistic dick he was. My mom basically just let him do whatever he wanted. Imagine our surprise when he gets arrested for raping my special needs cousin. He eventually gets on probation, and uses that opportunity to flee the country, basically leaving us to fend for ourselves.

By that time, I'd reached my early 20s. I didn't want to be like him at all. I basically became straight blue because anything that I associated with my father was immediately discarded. I did this for years. Years. It wasn't until about 4 years ago that I decided to get my shit together. I made efforts to lose weight, and I did. Everything red came naturally, but I was still wary.

It wasn't until last year where things went sour with this one girl that I strived to reform my thinking. I was better that I was before, but still was holding back. I went through my past, and everything kept coming back to my father. I rejected my past, so I worked to close loose ends.

And I did.

My final thread was tied when he called me about two months ago. He'd call me sparingly, but by now, I was dead inside. He called to check on my brother. Whatever. Give him nothing. Tell him it's his fault he fucked us up, and now you live with your choices. He breaks down crying, tells us he loves us, wishes the best for my brothers and I, blah blah blah. Hang up.

I can't say I don't regret it. He was my hero, but our father was the type who learned by jumping in and swimming. He tried to raise us in the same manner, and when he abandoned us, I guess he did.

My synopsis: You got problems? You don't run like a coward. You plant your feet, and you face it like a man. Learn humility, or else your hubris will destroy everything. You do you. Never forget who you are or where you came from.

Consciencekills · 2020-09-08T02:52:05+00:00

Every year gets better and builds upon what you've endured previously. There will be a time when you can hold your head high with the position you have secured for yourself, but the climb is always daunting.

WickedMo13 · 2020-09-08T05:03:03+00:00

Well thank God you are not your past , no matter how much your negative pattern of thinking demands you believe this because youre not

So how do you escape your past? You cant but you can own it, the trick is to turn it into a positive but you cant do that unless you have a plan to move on. Use the fear to set you free is one technique

Go to group meetings, Pay for therapy , Pay for a physical Trainer if in need of desperate measures pay for a plane ticket to Peru and seek a Shaman or some shit

Best Bet is to schedule your life around a goal that deals with working out, write out a plan step by step of how you will meet this goal though

Can you hold yourself accountable for not taking these steps without a pity party and instead use it to actually take the steps needed???

Is motivation the issue? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bOzk0OLz0Jc

Garathon · 2020-09-08T05:53:47+00:00

Dude, you're already well ahead. An ivy league education is more than most have. Relax, you have an entire life ahead of you.

macrian · 2020-09-08T06:03:04+00:00

For me, this always does the trick
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R2_Mn-qRKjA

" It gets easier. Every day it gets a little easier. But you got to do it every day. That's the hard part. But it does get easier."

2000inchbiceps · 2020-09-08T06:15:10+00:00

You're fine dude. Sounds like you're in your head a lot. You're about to graduate. Congrats. Want advice? Get a job right away. Build up that resume. Seek therapy if you need mental help and someone to listen. Budget, invest, help your mom and create an emergency fund. Get rental insurance if you're going to rent. Open some credit, build that score up and don't get into debt. Careful where you spend your time and who you spend your time with. It doesn't sound like you're grounded to reality. Meditate and go see a therapist if you keep thinking that pitiful shit. Build that self esteem and keep thinking it could always be worse.

RevolutionRose · 2020-09-08T06:52:48+00:00

Hey.... I am going to address you like the Ivy league student that you are, and leave out the part that your ass is broke as shit....
A considerable amount of stress adds up because of how peers end up, when you are from a good school. You already revealed it by letting us know how Your Ex and your friend ended up with a better job than yours. ....

Two Things
1) Comparison is to be done in a 10 years frame from graduation, not in 10 days frame. You will see that 95% of the class is almost at the same scale, and thats a level which is better than 90% of the population....and the 5% which are doing exceptionally better than the rest, are those who didnt do really well immediately after college.

2) Stop the internal negative narrative and Network as much as you can. Today's school friends are tomorrow's business contacts. Learn to Code.

I am supremely inspired by you making it to an Ivy league man, hope you share the story one day.

Jasperbeardly11 · 2020-09-08T06:57:18+00:00

Read philosophy. Look at Jordan Peterson's meaning of life. I try to post inspiring and thoughtful stuff on subreddit altruisticharmony. Look into stoicism. Peep the pursuit of wonder and academy of ideas and after skool YouTube channels. Read happiness by Matthieu Ricard. Please do the last one. I don't think you will want to die nearly as much.

RedLifts · 2020-09-08T08:09:04+00:00

Show yourself compassion, you’ve achieved more than a lot of people even with your disadvantage. It’s important to not judge yourself so harshly. Acknowledge your bad days and expand to make room for the accompanying emotions. They are all temporary, nothing last forever. Your struggle will not last forever. Some practical advice would be to figure out your values and your goals and start taking action in that direction. If you still feel helpless, talk to a therapist. Best investment you can make is in yourself, i.e your mental and physical health. Achieving what you set out to becomes much easier

Bungeeeeee · 2020-09-08T10:40:08+00:00

Replace self pitty with self compasion. Start working on healthy positive thoughts as a priority. Work on self respect. Basically have the inside of your mind a happy/good place to be. Why would you want your mind to sabotage you if you are already disciplined and have a self improving/high achieving mentality?

superbad4life · 2020-09-08T10:56:02+00:00

When I read this, I mentally asked why? What mentally keeps you going? I just watched this video last night and thought of you (first part, ~3min). The video talks about the driving factor in one's life and how someone can go through anything in order to achieve it.

You were not dealt the greatest hand, and there have been more obstacles that you need to work through. Dwayne Johnson at one point only had $7 in his pocket... heard he wasn't doing too bad. Don't negative talk; you're not a pussy, you're a bad ass that's about to blow up. Take advantage of what's in front of you, but most importantly, remember why you are doing it!

mrrooftops · 2020-09-08T12:04:43+00:00

Go do an Ayahuasca ceremony.

bilabrin · 2020-09-08T12:36:40+00:00

Avoid toxic people.

Avoid complainers.

Avoid judging people.

Avoid negativity and control your thoughts.

Meditate each day.

Be aware of sources of negativity in your life wether they be "friends" or family or your own thoughts and cut them out of your life (yes even family, especially family).

Maybe also check out Owen Cook on youtube.

Hotpapi16 · 2020-09-08T13:59:24+00:00

Read about stoicism, it changed my life. The sub here on reddit

Mr_Badass · 2020-09-08T14:10:15+00:00

Highly recommend you check out the CPTSD subreddit. Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is a fancy word that means childhood trauma. You might have some mental trauma from the abuse you had a childhood that explains the suicide attempts and feeling like your have to be Atlas and hold the world together.

IAMNUMBERBLACK · 2020-09-08T14:31:33+00:00

Dude. Im in my mid 20s and while I havent experienced what you have, I get it. I’m not a silver spooned kid, but u can ALWAYS tell the ones that were later in life.

What u have gone through and to make it where u are today is a testament to your character. The ppl are u would have already folded in your position. Once u graduate u are going to start making money and life will start to re balance for you.

School is one of the smallest blips in your life man, ur almost done too. Be shameful of nothing, take 3 deep breathes and be the person u always wanted to be

sportsdude523 · 2020-09-08T15:49:37+00:00

I can't give adviec on everything because I haven't experienced what you have, but here's what I can:

I can empathize with your adult figure issues and how that affects you. In my head as I grew I realized things like "Life turned out his way, and I reacted this way in important situations XYZ growing up because of how adult figure turned me into this through how mean they were. Turned me into a beta or wimp. Stopped me from having all the friends and girls etc." Which can be true. Because the adult figures condition your emotions to react to certain situations in certain ways that can leave you feeling like you don't get the results in life you should have had because they conditioned you a certain way. With time and effort, you will be able to rewire your emotions and become a fully independent adult that handles situations independently from how your childhood emotionally conditioned you to handle them.
I know the part about betrayal from your friend hurts. They're not your friend. Same thing happened to me (kindaish). I suggest not falling into a trap/rabbit hole of feeling like their every move is to be superior and dominate you. That will put you into difficult depths. Go find other friends. And if you have ot be around this dude, find a way to settle it with him and move on.
Those rich snob people are human beings too. Culture, class, tradition, differ due to socioeconomic factors. Thy probably see a few things about you as well that seem incredibly foreign to them. Maybe in some respects, it can be wrong going both ways. But also understand a baseline that had you grown up in their life, and they in yours, you both would have turned out like eachother. It's just a matter of life circumstances your born into that create these certain mannerisms and personalities in people. And that's just being human. Try to separate it ot a little bit. I've read that those less wealthy socialize through jokes, while the more wealthy socialize and express value with pedigree. We all probably have a little bit of both in us. Even though I grew up in financiall secure circumstances, I happen to lean towards jokes rather than flexing pedigree (I think flexing pedigree to socialize is not fun and shallow personally). So even though one person might lean more towards pedigree, it's not always like their personality is completely iredeemable in that direction (unless it's that bad then yeah, run away). There's still fun to be had with that kind of person. Socially experiment a little bit and broaden your socializing skills some while retaining the core of who you are.

GlobalArachnid · 2020-09-08T16:21:58+00:00

I know a thing or two about being raised dirt poor and neglected by a shitty parent. Story of my childhood.

You've naturally got more of a bad boy edge than these trust fund kids. You're flawed, imperfect, angry and neglected just like me. Turn your flaws and your tragic backstory into a sob story chicks will dig.

Read this: https://www.girlschase.com/content/tactics-tuesdays-spin-your-flaws-byronic-flaws

rabmcm32 · 2020-09-08T18:47:06+00:00

You have c-ptsd from your childhood. You’ve learned to channel your nervous energy into high achievement, your latest problems are just a setback that you can use to make you stronger. However you need to work on your self-criticism and feelings of unworthiness - read Pete walkers book(s) on c-ptsd .

2020-09-08T19:53:23+00:00

You are in your twenties, and you triumphed over a fair amount of adversity, got into an Ivy League school, and you have a job.

But you are bitter because some people who came from privilege have it better than you.

What is your actual complaint?

You have it better than the vast majority of your peers, and you have upward mobility.

I don't see anything in your post about how you learned to build wealth through trading and investing. If you had a few million in the bank would you be on here complaining?

Put the intellect that got you in the Ivy League school and got you a job to the question and task of HOW TO BUILD WEALTH. Then all your other problems will fall into place.

Go do some googling and figure out HOW TO BUILD WEALTH. Don't ask me for book recommendations. For a brain like you, a day or two will find you the five or six books that are worth reading.

Don't pay any attention to the rich people, except figure out how to manipulate them so that they are willing to help you along your way. Flatter them. Lick their asses. But not in an obvious way. Study them. Don't hate them or despise them. This ISN'T going to help you.

DubbleFUPAwitCheez · 2020-09-08T20:16:24+00:00

The irony about your bitterness towards them is, when you do become as successful or more successful than them, they will have a much more profound bitterness and resentment because they know that you did this yourself and there is no way in this life for them to have that.

Snowboard18 · 2020-09-08T22:13:17+00:00

I respect the absolute shit out of you man, keep kickin ass brother

Your on the fast track to be one of those dudes that no one can say shit to because you sir won the game of life. Keep grinding and you’ll be there soon

W_O_M_B_A_T · 2020-09-09T13:46:20+00:00

Read "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People." By Steven Covey.

This post is fucking embarrassing to be writing here,

First life lesson I can offer. Nobody cares how fucking embarrassed you feel. Shame, guilt, and embarrassment is not a real. It's something 95% we use to avoid taking action to get what we want or need. Get over your ego.

Leaving out other stuff as I feel fucking pathetic even typing this out.

Iron Rule of Thomassi #9: Never Self-Deprecate Under any Circumstances!

Defy this rule at your peril.

I worked my fucking ass off from nothing to get into an Ivy League. Had mental health issues in college, to the point where I tried to hang myself on numerous occasions, and so had to take an extra year as a result.

The fact that you didn't succeed on any of those instances of "suicide", means you need to get fucking real, not just with us, but get real with yourself. This wasn't suicide, it was attention-seeking behavior and manufactured helplessness. You weren't trying to hang yourself, it was a pretext to make yourself helpless so you could ask for attention and help.

You need to be willing to ask for attention and help when you're scared shitless, instead of indulging in drama. Doesn't matter what the obstacle or hangup is or how embarrassing it is. Other people have been there.

You need to stop trying to cause self destructive drama instead.

Attention-seeking drama is a usual tactic of persons with a fundamental belief System that they simply can't ask for help, and if they're ignored it's the end of the world.

This is called Learned-Helplessness. It's a behavior you would have learned from your dad who was probably the king of this kind of dysfunctional pointless trauma-drama.

Ex fucked my good friend,

Who cares, she's your ex. You're not the sex police, are you? If so when's the last time you got paid cash for trying to be the sex police?

Envy and jealousy are type symptoms of what Stephen Covey called a "Scarcity Mentality."

Envy is a real sickness, and it's purpose is to set yourself up as being magically helpless and inferior, and prevent you from living in the present and looking forward for the future.

and both of them have graduated with better grades and jobs than me.

Who cares. If they'd lived your same life circumstances and had the same challenges, fears and Personality as you, that might actually mean something. But they didn't and it doesn't. So this is a False Conflict.

Their success isn't relevant to your future plans, in no shape or form.

this is my fault:

So like what, you pulled a gun on them and forced them to fuck each other, then told get good grades?

You overestimate your control and authority here. Why, because it's easier to indulge in self-loathing, self-blaming, and self pity than to accept you didn't have any control over them and just didn't know them very well.

Again this kind of control issue is something your dad would probably have taught you, and you assumed this toxic way of thinking from imitating him.

Mum lost job due to covid, and so we are struggling to keep a roof above our heads.

Many major healthcare companies are hiring clerical workers. She needs to check out clinics and hospitals in her area.

At college, I'm surrounded by the most fucking priviledged people you could imagine:

Crabs-in-a-Bucket Mentality.

But are they boring? That's the real question.

And if so, then why are you getting such a hate-erection for boring trust fund babies?

The issue is you think money makes you magically fun and interesting to be around.

who haven't worried a day in their life,

Sure they do. They just worry about somewhat more trivial things. Worry and anxiety has nothing to do with proportion. If it's not one thing people are worrying and anxious about, it's another damn thing. You don't have a monopoly on "real" anxieties.

Everyone has something. Don't think you're special in this regard because your anxieties and neuroses are somehow more meaningful.

and it just makes me feel more bitter

Nope.

You were bitter and envious long before you were in school. Bitterness again was a trait you learned from your abusive dad. Your college classmates ain't shit.

Few people have more bitterness towards the outside world than child abusing cowards and sick fucks like your dad. So you're just following your dad's training and coaching on how to be a massively envious, ungrateful, unappreciative, and bitter fucker.

Stop following his training.

as they swan through life.

You need to cut out the I'm-special-ism. You're not a victim here of a "lack of privilege."

You're talking about people whose lives you actually know fuck-all about and using them like they were sock puppets in you own little morality play about bitterness, envy, victimhood, and about how your life is just too difficult.

The trouble is the story of your play stinks.

Find a new narrative that helps you be a little more successful and a little more at peace with yourself. Having some privileges in your life isn't a felony. It'll bite them in the ass later at some point due to naivety and being sheltered.

Lads, i keep swinging, and I keep swinging, but I'm in my early 20s now, and I just don't know how long I can keep this up.

You're not dead yet, so continuing to swing at the ball is your privilege as a non-dead person. It's not some kind of punishment. Start worrying about when you stop being able to feel the sting of frustration and failure.

The past 20 something years have been rough and I feel like I'm fighting against the tide here.

If you're not walking up river, then what are you? That's right, you're just a corpse floating facedown, drifting out to sea.

Which one do you really want to be? You want to be a walker or a floater?

haasteagle · 2020-09-08T03:04:39+00:00

This worked for me. Read Bruce Lee books, make him your Uncle Bruce. Read Stoicism books. Meditate. Go to a Boxing gym and learn to Box. Take that shit out on the pads. Looks like you have discipline sorted so everything above will come easier. Oh and get comfortable with telling assholes to get fucked to their face. Have fun.

guynpdx · 2020-09-08T11:07:47+00:00

Stop fucking complaining and making excuses. Own your shit.
Who gives a fuck about other people's privilege? Boo fucking hoo!!! Did you just figure out that life is not fair?

Figure out your mission and go get it. And shut the fuck up.

bachbozo · 2020-09-08T02:51:16+00:00

Buteyko Breathing Method, Microdose Psilocybin AKA Magic Mushrooms, Semen Retention, Zerocarb/Keto, Exercise In Nature, and create Art/Music

You'll be fine in 2 weeks.

Happy to expand or answer any questions.

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SteveSan82 · 2020-09-08T03:17:13+00:00

Stop living in the past. Stop whining. Stop thinking negatively.

estanon95 · 2020-09-08T05:23:21+00:00

Kill all of them with an axe

antariusz · 2020-09-08T09:46:05+00:00

Wtf advice are you expecting? Yea life sucks until you turn 27.935 at which point you will be visited by a magical fairy and suddenly all the things that piss you off will no longer exist.

Your biggest problem seems to be you didn’t once talk about what your goals and purpose in life are. What is the point of working if you don’t have a goal, what is the point of any struggle? Figure out your goal and then if you’re a man, you’ll figure out a way to achieve it. The key is to always have a next goal. You don’t even have 1. You’re achieving just for the sake of achievement. Why do you need to be in an Ivy League school? Is the only goal in your life to have a diploma? Wtf good is a piece of paper?

lordn9ne · 2020-09-08T00:37:23+00:00

So what's your question?

Title	Need some older male advice here
Author	IrishWolf11
Upvotes	198
Comments	113
Date	September 8, 2020 12:21 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/iojfrx/need_some_older_male_advice_here/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/need-some-older-male-advice-here.212212 https://theredarchive.com/post/212212