Seems like post here everyday - an example of how fucked up my head is..

Ok new to the RP way so go easy on me. Have come here looking for answers and i have only read no more nice guy and TRM a good while back.

One year gf. Complete oneitis. Therapy because of my insecurity and jealousy.

Didn’t vet.

Red flags: Drinks a good bit Likes nights out with girls Lowish n count Dropped the L bomb to her after 8 months she didnt reciprocate and told me after 10 Played me down to friends and family Says her biggest regret is not going to mixed male and female school Talks about other handsome men to me in street and on tv Recently new guy started in her office of 10 where she works 40 hours a week and nights too. I joked about love affair trying to play it cool and she said hes quite handsome and be something good to look at when tired at 4am

The last one is the biggest flag of all for me as i cant mateguard even if i wanted to. Non-RP folk have told me ‘its ok to fancy others’ .. ‘shes honest which is good’ .. ‘she wouldnt have told u if she was going to do something’ .. however that was before guy even started. I havent done any due diligence on him but was truly dreaded by it. Shes talked about a few of her colleagues to me recently and him included .. Hes single/ on tinder and lining up dates. Has a kid and is divorced.. not exactly a catch..but as she fancies him that doesnt matter. He’ll only need to cotton on and glance her way for her to get tingles. I’ve been that guy myself.

Now i pride myself on what i bring to the party. Earn almost double their wage/ musician / lift for competition / always do well when i spin plates and was day gaming before covid. Mentally i’m broken tho.. shes the fucking sun to my emotional world.

I need to drop this LTR. I know that now. Too many RFs and disrespect .. and tbh shes ruining my life and self esteem.

I’m going to build up to this in next 3-4 weeks as lockdown will be easing then and i’ll have more opportunity to do things.

So heres the question. How do i minimise my loss.. ideally id love to go back to spinning straight away but mentally not sure if I’m there. Do i take time to myself and dont go straight to spinning?

How do i get myself mentally prepared for this.. i’m too far into oneitis to be able to be ok regardless.. do i start creating distance before i drop her? Go cold or up it a little while mentally checking out?