This might sound stupid, but follow me for a second.
I used to have long hair and a decently long beard. I felt much more "myself", and I'm not gonna lie; I had some pretty bitchin hair.
Well, last year I cut it, and eventually shaved the beard as well. Not really prompted by anyone; having long hair was just a ton of maintenance, and I thought it would be a nice gesture to donate it to making wigs for kids going through chemo.
Now when I had long hair, I would get loads of comments on it. Mostly by either other dudes, or way older women. But occasionally at parties, a woman might ask to touch my hair or something.
But when I cut my hair, a lot of my (married) female coworkers say it was a huge improvement. A few months ago at lunch, I joked about growing my hair back out, and one said "absolutely not", that I was handsome with the short hair.
So it sounds weird, but I guess it's a bit of an identity crisis.
On one hand, I think if I lose some more weight, I'd probably look pretty decent. I dress pretty nicely for work these days. But I also feel like I'm probably on the "less attractive" end of the spectrum. I'm a 'ginger', and people naturally assume me to be a "nerd" more often than not.
On the other hand, I kinda miss being called a "viking". When I had my long hair and beard, I felt more "masculine", like I was ready for a brawl at the drop of a hat. But then, I also looked incredibly goofy wearing "business casual" clothes for work (and I never even had a suit, until after cutting my hair). I also think some people took me less seriously (an ex-coworker once remarked our old boss had long hair when he was young, but "then he got his shit together", which I always took at a slight dig at me).
Perhaps a better way of framing this would be:
Would it be better to embrace that "viking" look I used to own? Or would I be better pursuing more of that timeless "James Bond" look, even if I come up short?
How do you determine what "the best version of yourself" looks like?
[–]StephenHawkingsEars1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]sharkymcstevenson690 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Jcorb[S] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link