I've been doing some pretty harsh self-evaluating the past week or so. My financial situation has improved pretty dramatically the past couple of years, and I've definitely gained a measure of confidence "in general". However, I still have problems... well, interacting with women at all.

My mind has kind of been going back to when I was a kid, and wondering if my parents may have genuinely fucked me up for life.

See... I didn't go to school growing up.

Even saying I was "home-schooled" would be a lie. Fact is, my parents moves around so much, that by second grade me and my sister were already pretty traumatized. We were always "the new kids", never new anybody or anything about where we lives. By second grade, I'd been to seven different schools. So, our parents just pulled us out.

So I never had "friends", never had any sort of relationships with other kids. I briefly went to school for a few months in what would've been my 11th grade year, but that's when a ton of my insecurities started coming out, and so I dropped out and got a GED.

In some ways, I think I've come a long way; when I was 16, I could scarcely even speak to people without having a literal panic attack. Compared to recently, I've been called a "people person" when it comes to chatting total strangers.

But when it comes to the opposite sex... I'll be honest, man; I feel like I'm just that clueless kid still. I've never had a friend to "hype me up" to ask someone out, or even felt comfortable enough to ask that. I'm a grown-ass adult, and I'm honestly more comfortable lying about who I am, than exposing the fact I'm actually a complete fucking mess when it comes to this stuff.

Which, I know my problem is overthinking stuff. I tend to overthink everything, it's honestly one of the reasons I'm so good at my job. But I feel like even if I woke up tomorrow looking like Ryan Reynolds, I would still struggle, because I just don't know how to navigate any of this shit.

I dunno. I guess I'm just wondering if I "missed something" that everyone else learned while they were going to school?