Why Tinder is a waste of time for most guys

Serious_Tour · 2018-08-21T18:13:37+00:00

Saw this interesting piece yesterday. Apparently even ugly girls have plenty of thirsty guys to choose from.

ANGRY_ATHEIST · 2018-08-21T21:18:51+00:00

There are some decent points here, but I have been using online dating since the late 90's, across almost every site there is or has been. It absolutely is a numbers game, it always has been.

Before Tinder, online dating was simply not socially acceptable. Just about everyone online (yes, Tinder is online too) was desperate. During my early days, I got some dates, but the women were just the worst. Cliche things like looking nothing like her pictures, to even outright smelling bad. While it may be arguable that much of my time online was pre-TRP, I believe that online dating is constantly evolving, and becoming more socially acceptable in a way. Tinder is quite a bit more passe than it used to be (Bumble seems to have better luck these days), however, there are still a few facts to consider.

High SMV women do not use online dating.
They simply do not need to. They already have enough attention from orbiters or otherwise in real life. If you see an attractive woman on a dating site, you can pretty much guarantee that there is a reason she is there. She is also banging at least 3 different dudes a week. If you don't use protection, you will catch an STD from these hoes. This is even true for sites like christianmingle where the women claim to be "good girls" etc.

Women on these sites literally get 100's of messages a day.
If you want any sort of luck, you need to stick out from the crowd, big time. This is one of the main reasons it's a numbers game, even if you're in the top 20%, the chances are she won't even open your message.

Even women who genuinely want a "real" relationship from these sites get constantly pumped-and-dumped.
I have got to the point where I can look at a woman's profile and tell exactly where she is in the burnout process. At first they love the outdoors and music. After the first 40 dudes (the exact numbers are difficult to tell since women lie about this, this is just my estimation), she'll state she doesn't want to play games. 80 or so dicks into it, she'll specifically put in her profile that she is "NOT LOOKING FOR A HOOKUP!" After so long, they'll just delete their profiles and tell all their friends that online dating is for losers.

If your numbers are high enough, you can get lucky... but it's very rare. You are much better off expanding your social circle or gaming IRL.

twdziki · 2018-08-21T17:48:50+00:00

It's a waste of time if you suck or are stuck in a place with really crappy dating scene. Otherwise it's a very time-efficient way to get laid. And you're not risking poisoning your social circle if things go sour.

XT3M3 · 2018-08-21T20:17:12+00:00

i have been travelling a lot this year. tinder and bumble has more use as trying to get a hookup in a foreign place rather than trying to get one at home. ( moreso once your profile shows you arent from the area)

girls are alot more open and sluty when there a high chance you'll never see each other again or have contact with their people.

thats how i see it. want proof ? spoof your location to some new place. watch the magic

MrGoodStuff05 · 2018-08-21T18:35:32+00:00

It is a waste of time. I had over 5k matches in my old profile in the span of a year and out of those I managed to pull 30 women, mostly 5 and 6s. I used it when I was traveling a lot so at least half of those were way too far to do anything when we got to set up a date.

It's a numbers game and depends heavily on where you're located and the dating scene there.

Almost all women use it solely for validation and you won't get them out of that frame because they already have plenty of cock in real life to choose from. Why would they bother grabbing drinks with a rando off Tinder if they can go to chad's house get boned all night.

Cold approach or even night game is so much more effective. Out of 10 approaches you'll pull 1 chick, whereas with Tinder, out of 100 matches you'll be lucky if you pull 1.

Caspero444 · 2018-08-21T19:00:40+00:00

If you say one wrong word or sentence they will ghost you. If you make plans days or a week away most likely will never happen. Most guys are talking to a few women at a time. Most women talking to dozens or more guys. You get bumped out of the rotation in a nano-second. Worst thing about Tinder is it creates the mindset that people are disposable commodities.

4matting · 2018-08-21T17:49:34+00:00

You need to build a top 20% profile. Shitty pics, and beta bio will get you swiped left even if you are a top 20% in real life.

Get great pics that casually show how awesome you and your life is.

When messaging, follow this one rule: "always be closing"

TRPdoctor · 2018-08-21T20:58:48+00:00

Tinder is only a waste of time if you are doing it wrong. I did it wrong for a long time and deleted the app. I gave it another shot a few years ago and it is actually the easiest way to get laid.

Good pictures and being a decent looking guy are key. This will get them to swipe right but that's only the first part. Lie about your height in your bio. Girls are stupid.
You need to be able to send a few messages and not sound needy. Then ask for the number because the app is "creepy" or "drains your battery".
Once you have their number tell them that you either want to facetime or have her send you a selfie to make sure that she isn't catfishing you. I have had way more success if they agree to facetime. This ensures that you wont be awkward if you meet up so she is more likely to go hang out with you. Plan a hangout within 2 days if possible.
The hangout: If you have made it this far then you are ready for the meetup. Keep it simple but plan a second spot in case the initial meetup goes well. I used to go to the same bar every time and sit in the same seat so that I could focus on my game instead of where to go / sit. Now that I moved to a shitty town my options are more limited, but I have had success with doing 1 game of bowling as our first meetup. It gives you a chance to pick on her for her bowling skills.
The second destination I keep simple too, either take her to a bar or to get a milkshake. Taking her to a second place is important because it makes her feel like she has more of a connection with you.

Make sure that you are the one that says when it is time to end the "date". Start kino as soon as you meet her. Don't "build up" to the kiss at the end of the night, get it out of the way asap.

atticusfinch1973 · 2018-08-21T19:40:54+00:00

I have always had a great time with Tinder, but then I’m attractive and have decent text and in person game.

Plus in my demographic of mid 30’s to 40’s there’s lots of desperate post wall women if you just want to get laid.

[deleted] · 2018-08-21T18:46:06+00:00

Its a waste of time, and its taught me nothing other than I have to invest more time in my phone in order to get dates. I would rather go out and aim for something in public, and work on my IRL game.

W_O_M_B_A_T · 2018-08-21T19:31:23+00:00

Tinder is a waste of time for most guys because most guys have photos that are boring AF and vaguely annoying.

SpinPlates · 2018-08-21T18:32:39+00:00

Tinder takes minimal effort. Every guy should throw a profile together and swipe right every few days. There is no reason not to.

It's very efficient and if you're a decent looking guy in a major city you can do well.

Toxik6 · 2018-08-21T19:43:47+00:00

I’ve personally gotten nothing from it and feels like a huge waste of time.

always_sad12 · 2018-08-21T16:45:43+00:00

I've been with 30+ girls from tinder, while not being jacked. It's a numbers game. Granted I have a "script" that I'll use on girls that guarantees success with the ones who aren't just seeking validation.

Thing about tinder is you've got to shoot down SMV wise, so I only use it when I'm REALLY horny and want a ONS. If you want quality girls you'll have to grow a pair and do it in the real world.

klo2145 · 2018-08-21T20:16:48+00:00

Even if you match with her you still have to stand out from all of the hundreds of other guys that she matched with. And believe me she matched with hundreds of other guys. That's assuming the girl is even serious and isn't it doing it just to boost her own ego.

DubbleFUPAwitCheez · 2018-08-21T18:11:48+00:00

I think of it the same way you think of cold calling or going to conventions in a business. If you get 1% of the clients (girls) to buy (fuck) that you interact with this way that's 1 out of 100. For such low effort it's pretty good. I think I averaged 3-8% when I was doing work on tinder but that was a couple years ago, might be different. I think the mentality should be the same though.

ThatDudeEric90 · 2018-08-22T00:33:35+00:00

My man! You are an angel or something because I JUST came to my senses about this BS.

Long story short i'm over the flakes because of reasons like this. They have a MASSIVE abundance of cocks to choose from and maybe if you talk to them on the right day of their ovulation cycle you'll get a meet up.

I've banged a few off Tinder so it has served me well about 20% of the time. The other is just 80% women seeking self validation.

My opinion, you're going to download and try it out. You will. You may or may not meet someone and you may or may not fuck. I don't know anything about you but based off my history and women I know who use it, they're there for the free meal/drink/orbiter and just possibly sex.

My suggestion, since you're going to download it anyway don't go into it with high hopes. Keep practicing your day/night game and meet women in person. It's much more fulfilling. Just use the Tinder app for when you're taking a shit or something.

kyromanji · 2018-08-21T17:39:55+00:00

I've gotten laid multiple times on tinder, average of HB7 and most of the time didn't have to meet up at a bar. I always messaged first, made small talk, ask for the SC, then talk to em on there. Immediately progress the convo to sexual, plan a chill date and the rest is history. I'm not a Chad but I'm really handsome and tall. My demeanor is chill/cocky/aloof and it works for me

syn1us · 2018-08-21T19:35:43+00:00

I'm Chad himself so I do get a lot of matches. The flaking is unreal though, and only half the numbers end up in something in the real world. I honestly prefer real-time interactions, real game is superior to online dating.

purplefidgetmidget · 2018-08-21T19:52:47+00:00

This is not the sub for this kind of shitpost, stick to theredpill subreddit to post crap theories

All you need is a good photo, photoshop it, myspace angles, whatever. Once the matches roll in use standard tinder shit.

[deleted] · 2018-08-21T22:17:27+00:00

If you’re not getting laid in real life, you’re going to have an even harder time on Tinder.

cobalt1728 · 2018-08-22T01:01:40+00:00

Total waste of time

humzy · 2018-08-22T01:32:47+00:00

You don't have to be white to have success on tinder you just have to be good looking (although I am guessing its different per country/area).

One thing I noticed though is that there is a large group of girls who will flake me once I tell them my ethnicity. They expect me to be Brazilian or something but background is actually Pakistani. I didn't realise how racist women are until I got on this app haha.

I am a good looking dude who is ripped so I am fairly successful with tinder but it is a lot of wasted energy. A bit of a crutch to be honest.

I use it when I am not socially active due to being busy with work/business.

xddm2653 · 2018-08-22T01:32:56+00:00

I remember tinder was the shit in 2015. Literally first match was a hot girl looking to get fucked. Skewed my expectations of it but I had good results for about a year.

Waste of time now

Psychological_Radish · 2018-08-22T01:56:33+00:00

Guys are gonna hamster Tinder depending on their own personal circumstances, just like the eternal Game vs. Looks debate (of which this is an offshoot).

If you consistently fail on dating apps, then you're going to rationalize that by claiming irl is better anyway,Tinder is just out to make money, the girls are unrealistically picky, etc.

If you're successful with Tinder, then you say stuff like it's dating on easy mode, dudes who have banged dozens of chicks, etc.

The truth is, as always, somewhere in the middle. Tinder is certainly not a waste of time, as many men can attest. It's simply another tool in the toolbelt. How you choose to allocate your time to pulling women (online vs. real life) is going to depend on personal circumstances. Aesthetically gifted men (or just those who understand how to take good pictures) will slay. Others will have to rely more on Game.

RandomTRPan0n · 2018-08-22T04:01:32+00:00

I've been moderately successful.

Im a very harsh critic and rank myself as a slightly above average 6. In girl speak I was probably top 40% of guys on looks alone. Im average height and overweight with a 30% BF.

6 - easily attract these girls, I'd say i get 5 to 10 in a week who message me, LTR with two

7 - takes some game, but nothing outrageous, i get 1 or 2 a week on tinder. LTR with one

8 - multiple dates from tinder but never f closed one from tinder. but LTR with a few IRL.

9 - got into a weird snapchat sexting thing with a model from Rock solid tinder game. It was hot, but no f close. Pure dumb luck mixed with dry humor worked.

10 - never

Tinder game is something else entirely. A good rule of thumb is you should be able to get your equivalent rank easily and can game up two ranks with some practice.

Id say my tinder game was strong. I improved my pictures, got a solid opener, and committed to witty banter. I only used the app late at night and purposely gamed the ELO system to improve my chances.

lordvoltano · 2018-08-22T04:30:06+00:00

I had one success in Tinder out of hundreds of matches. She was a real cutie fresh out of college, I'd say a solid 7.5/10. She was looking for a boyfriend but I managed to conditioned her as a plate. She moved on eventually, getting herself a proper boyfriend. But a couple times a year we still met up to shag. She's married now and had recently contacted me and said she regret her decision to get married to this guy. I'm still undecided if I wanna tap that ass again.

I think the key here is there's no guaranteed way to get laid on Tinder. The girl need to be in the right mindset, while you need to be the right kind of 'interesting' in her eyes. What I mean by interesting is to be out of the norm of the guys she usually meet throughout her day. As I'm definitely not a Chad, I use my 'intelligence' to capture those self proclaimed 'sapiosexuals'.

RedSkeller · 2018-08-21T16:27:33+00:00

I'm not Chad but last year I was averaging about 2.3 lays a month off Tinder. This year been busier but really just getting burnt out on it. I've met some interesting people, mostly chicks that are crazy/weird/thots/real winners and have no idea why they're going to be cat ladies. For the most part, tinder is having good pictures and paying to win (tinder gold is almost necessary). I'll get a match a day (a good match mind you), but with gold and the initial account boost you start off with close to 50 about 10 - 15 of which are decent. For the moment I'm taking a break from it and have been doing bumble.

TRPKiddo · 2018-08-21T15:45:10+00:00

I’m not a chad at all and I get a bunch of matches. I don’t have professional pictures. I have one selfie and a one line bio.

CainPrice · 2018-08-21T18:01:48+00:00

You don't have to be "Chad", just have good pictures and decent game. The women on Tinder -want- to have sex. They are hoping you don't suck because they want to meet you and let you make them feel good for an hour. It's such a disappointment when you say something stupid.

youcantdenythat · 2018-08-21T19:52:44+00:00

Sidebar: --> Everything OmLaLa ever wrote

Check out his online dating posts.

cptgoatsack · 2018-08-21T22:57:24+00:00

It's the dumpster diving of hookups. Be sure you wear a rubber, or maybe two.

PR0JECT_XIII · 2018-08-22T00:44:47+00:00

I haven't used dating apps since I decided to take the red pill. I have it on my phone (tinder) but I haven't bothered activating my account.

Previous experience would say average. It's a hit and miss, sometimes you just say the right thing at the right time and you get laid, others you have to put in a bit of work.

The reason I haven't bothered with tinder since adopting red pill philosophy is that I want to create an abundance in the real world, and as stated by Rollo in the rational male, dating apps are buffers.

Online dating is perhaps the best buffer ever conceived – particularly for less than physically ideal women. In fact it’s so effective that businesses can be built upon the common insecurities and fear of rejection of both sexes.

Dating apps should suppliment your sexual strategy, rather than being your only supply - not my own idea, just something I remember reading from an endorsed contributor.

Take my comment as a grain of salt, I am no way a wealth of knowledge, but as I continue to change my understanding of reality and sexual strategy it pays to go back to the basics.

tchower · 2018-08-22T04:48:27+00:00

The hottest girls I hooked up with I always met in person, never online or on the internet. Just me personally. So I think there’s a lot of truth in what you’re saying.

plenty_of_eesh · 2018-08-22T05:36:42+00:00

Pretty much all of the comments here are more useful or insightful than this "article".

It sounds like it was written by a 14 year old.... Or a 19 year old who was told "write as much as you can without saying anything so they keep scrolling and seeing the sneakers ads..."

The title mentions tinder but the article is about "sending a message and getting no response". It's probably copy-pasta from 2006 that was originally written about OkCupid...

Anyway.

Interesting discussion in the comments so I guess it was worth it?

Sick_Of_IT_2855 · 2018-08-22T05:56:43+00:00

Not good looking or chad,or big or myscular with tatoos,so my experience has been devastatingly horrible. My depression gets worse after being on there.

Dartleather · 2018-08-22T06:06:00+00:00

I am very successful with Tinder purely because I look really good, have great pictures doing cool shit + social proof, and my text game is strong. I get dates with 8+ regularly.

But because I am beta it all falls apart in person.

Morphs_ · 2018-08-22T07:09:06+00:00

I don't consider myself a complete Chad, yet I know physically I'm in the upper 5%-ish bracket of guys my age group (I'm 37).

Tinder has worked VERY WELL for me, so overall I tend to dislike these Tinder bashing threads. Yes the algorithm of Tinder sucks, with its match throttling etc. But it still has gotten me more lays than any other method.

Get some decent pictures, make a clear profile text that weeds out the BB seeking women, and you're set.

Bedtimeshine · 2018-08-22T13:56:13+00:00

It’s a waste of time for any man with self respect

Aurora921 · 2018-08-21T15:53:33+00:00

What's the question, man? Bad looks don't kill the game entirely but good looka certainly make the game easier. I got lays from Tinder when I was 30kg overweight. Obviously not Model Tier but in the 5 to 6.5 range. Gotta lower those standards a bit in that vastly inflated marketplace. Still, go for it as any practice is good practice.

oytrp · 2018-08-21T18:02:53+00:00

A lot of guys think it's valuable because you can get laid from it.

The reality is, they are timid bitches who are afraid to approach in real life. If they put half the time they put into the app into a approaching in real life they would get twice the amount of lays.

Don't get me wrong, it has it's purpose. Sending a message at 2am and getting laid at 2:30 is a magical thing. But that's about all it's good for.

mallardcove · 2018-08-21T16:52:14+00:00

Muh

I suck at Tinder

Muh

TonytheNetworker · 2018-08-21T15:52:28+00:00

It varies. I had an ok time on Tinder a few years back. I was able to smash an 8 (she was a thot though, would've slept with anyone TBH) but that was about it after using it for 3 months and still being a beta. Now? I've improved my physical attractiveness, lost lots of weight, eating clean, get my hair cut more often, green contacts, dress better, etc. I get matches fairly often, I don't consider myself a Chad though, probably never will be, although I get a lot of messages like "You look like a fuckboy but you're cute hee hee."

JamalChic · 2018-08-21T20:47:41+00:00

If you're white it's good, even if you're average . Every white male is born with the unalienable right of the entitlement to ethnic vagina.

The founding fathers were quite clear on this, and I quote : "Neither the existing currycel , ricecell , or kfccel population, their descendents, nor any others shall be permitted to enjoy the fruits of White society."

orezavi · 2018-08-21T18:14:25+00:00

How is using online dating apps not considered beta?

Title	Why Tinder is a waste of time for most guys
Author	RedpilledChris
Upvotes	71
Comments	138
Date	August 21, 2018 3:40 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/9947kp/why_tinder_is_a_waste_of_time_for_most_guys/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/why-tinder-is-a-waste-of-time-for-most-guys.130864 https://theredarchive.com/post/130864