Wow, you really can't show any emotional weakness at all, can you?

hollabomb · 2020-11-15T00:19:17+00:00

Dude it’s your mom and it’s cancer. Do want you can and cherish the time you have with her. If this girl can’t handle it fuck her.

Talinor09 · 2020-11-15T00:24:03+00:00

Lol. I knew a guy whose fiance was having second thoughts after he was run over by a truck and left bleeding out on the side of the road with a crushed rib-cage, pelvis, legs and arms.

Somehow he survived and recovered physically after a number of operations however for a good six months he had severe PTSD from lying there in a pool of blood thinking he was going to die.

She was complaining he’s “not the same”, and was having second thoughts about their eventual wedding.

Like bitch, your finance got run over and left to die by a fucking truck! Of course he’s going to have a few short term psychological issues. And i’m not talking about an SUV like a full on 3.5 tonne roadhaul truck.

Dude was hell lucky to survive, not lose any limbs and keep everything downstairs.

Knowing the nature of women what she said/felt didn’t surprise me one bit..

OttoVonBismark71 · 2020-11-14T23:32:56+00:00

[deleted]

Atrp1961 · 2020-11-15T04:50:42+00:00

2 examples of my life.

15 years back i was dating this chick, and during that period found out my mother had breast cancer and so did my sister. I was devastated and opened up to her and cried. Yep she started cheating on me within days.
Back then my ex wife and me were on good social terms. One day i woke up in agonizing pain in my back and could barely move. Let alone get up, had to crawl an inch and made it to phone and called her first. She said there's nothing she could do and hungup. While i was always there for here even for slightest inconvenience.

Those + trp made me shut down emotionally to women. Lockup and throw the key away.

Now even on death, i mourn alone or with my closest buddy.

Hard lesson learned.

red__Man · 2020-11-15T00:13:48+00:00

first of all take care of your mother, she loves you unconditionally, and be grateful you were able to see that bitch's shitty behavior through red lenses. the average dude will wonder why his bitch doesn't answer his messages and he will never find out

The1ndex · 2020-11-15T01:30:48+00:00

My mom got sick and died. My LTR at the time constantly complained during the time my mom was sick that “I wasn’t the same,” and shit tested me hard the entire time. I dumped her shortly after.

Women’s nature unfolded before my eyes. You can read thousands of the same story.

Women are children who are dependent on you, incapable of unconditional loyalty, and will maintain an “it’s all about them” perspective — obviously individuals vary.

This is why TRP preaches leadership — as a leader, you’re responsible for the success of your unit regardless of what challenges you face.

Sorry about your mom man. DM me if you ever need to talk to someone.

BasilevsNihili · 2020-11-14T23:59:05+00:00

She doesn't care about your feelings. It's a shit test. Evolution tells her you're weak, no fucks about the humanity of your feelings.

Rev_Irreverent · 2020-11-15T00:51:14+00:00

A very similar story happened to me, but i had a different interpretation. My grandmother fell in the bathroom and hit her head. I had to pick her up from a puddle of blood and calm her down, then took her to hospital.

The following day, i called this stacy and canceled the date we'd have because i'd have to be with grandmother in the hospital. Stacy answered "ooh poor boy! That's ok, take care of your granny!" I felt some irony in her voice, but carried on.

The next week, my grandmother passed away. I spent the following weekend in morning and then spoke to Stacy again. I tried to schedule a date with her twice, but she refused. That's when I realized that she was rejecting me because of what happened to my grandmother. My interpretation is that she was so narcissistic that she did not admit "being put in the background", even in a situation like that.

situ139 · 2020-11-15T05:28:47+00:00

Honestly,

You guys sound like you LTR women that shouldn't have made it past the casual stage.

In-fact, if you reversed the gender, you'd find most male "friends" act the same towards you when you're really hurting.

I'm not even sure I'd call this emotional weakness, your mother has been re-diagnosed this is a serious and mentally taxing thing.

As someone who has gone through emotional periods, I've found that 99% of people don't care, even those close to you. It takes a special person to have empathy and compassion, most see two feet in front of them and that's it. We can only relate to others based on experiences we've had, if your girl has lived a privileged life she won't have anywhere near the emotional maturity that's required to have true compassion and empathy.

And I think that emotional maturity is the most important thing to look for in a girl.

So did she leave because you were weak?

Maybe.

But she saved you a ton of time, by showing her true colors. Ghost her and spend time with your mom.

Sqtlol · 2020-11-15T10:02:10+00:00

I used to see a girl just like this. I was so caught up with her and honestly thought she could be the one. We were in the midst of a deep conversation one late night, and somehow the topic steered towards cancer. My father previously defeated testicular cancer, and I shed a single tear of joy when we were talking about it - the man means everything to me.

She would shortly thereafter become distant and hook up with others. The pussy dried up because I shed a single tear. No fucking kidding.

So at this point I start wondering what the fuck is wrong with this woman, and I still to this day check in on her socials to remind me of the following:

She’s neck deep in ugly ass gimmicky thot tattoos
She’s a «freelance journalist» for some tiny ass shitty ass newspaper in a dead ass city
She is together with a tiny ass twink of an asian transgender dude with orange hair
She cut her hair super short, looking like a proper Karen, actually went from a 8/10 to a 3/10

These bitches have it coming for them, don’t worry. If she can’t handle a glimmer of emotion, she’s a shitty woman and a shitty person. Let the trash out and find someone else.

Sorry about your mother. I hope she pulls through.

smolzino · 2020-11-14T23:56:17+00:00

Doesn't apply to all women, doesn't apply to all situations. In this case this girl is shallow, a lot of girls that I know would not only have kept normal behavior, they would probably check up on you and be understanding.

It's not that you cannot show any emotion, it's more that you should not seem to be defeated by your emotions. You can be emotional as long as you also display the ability to deal with it. Of course if up until now most of your relationship with this girl was about fun, exciting stuff, you chose your moment very poorly.

TheDero · 2020-11-14T23:23:23+00:00

There's a reason vitamins come in gummy form, some people just don't want to swallow shit the right way.

If it hurts to see TRP come true before your very eyes, it should. My (ex) gf never looked at me the same way when I broke down in the car with her. She distanced me and dumped me like a dog about two weeks later. That redpilled me real quick.

It happens man, start talking to other girls. It will sting for a while but chatting with and fucking other females will ease the pain. You'll be over it eventually.

IBeMadToo · 2020-11-15T01:10:10+00:00

Un-Bonded women only care about the (negative) emotions of their children. They care a bit about the husband but not in a loving caring way. It's just her monitoring how bad it's going to be and how long he may not be useful and if it's worth it to stick around.

Un-Bonded Women don't want to be around a man that is sad or mad. If he's not either happy or stoic she's not interested.

Un-bonded women are High N count women. Sure, women that have had childhood trauma, were ACTUALLY abused or raped have a difficult time bonding. But those reasons were out of her control.

The most typical reason a woman cannot bind with a man is - she was a slut. Just like a cow doesn't give a shit about the bull after she gets what she wanted. to her, bulls are a dime a dozen. So are cows, but women think they're special.

ReasonablyGoodMexica · 2020-11-15T02:20:35+00:00

Hey, no. Look it's fine. Now this might be a shitty analogy given the time investment dimentions, but I believe it fits.

I was re learning how to bake certain dishes with my mother a few months ago and I wanted to test how would a certain dish 'fail' when cooked intentionally in a wrong way.

We both knew it was going to suck, and it did, but in the process I learned about the dish.

You experimented and you learned your stuff. To me, this random internet stranger, the ` i wanted to test this theory` thing is enough justification for me. Even though you broke a plate, you learned and you must know that precious knowledge, out of all precious things, never comes free.

Keep up the good work and cherish the time you have left with your dear mother.

desbest · 2020-11-15T01:50:36+00:00

Only women and feminists say that men should show emotions to women. Never take advice on how to seduce women from women, as they fail to understand the hard work involved in building and maintaining attraction and women are solipsistic when it comes to intergender dynamics because they think gender is a social construct so they assume that men like the same things they like. Only get advice from men.

RedpilledZoomer · 2020-11-14T23:52:58+00:00

Maybe you told her too much stuff about the unfortunate event and she just tried to be nice and play the "you can tell me what's wrong" role, but most girls don't actually care about someone's else problems.

It's normal to open up but you should do it with your male buddies, who you trust the most. Take it easy, don't stress about her.

-since · 2020-11-15T00:44:21+00:00

Here's the thing about the truth. It's a hard pill to swallow. Most don't care for it, will cough it up, or will half eat it.

There will be times when you want to empirically validate theories and search for your own truths. This is fine from a philosophical standpoint, since we as men are naturally inclined to the truth (sans bullshit).

Time and time again, you will be disappointed to find these truths validated IRL, and the small % of people who see them were right all along.

Just a minor mistake in the long journey. Strive for consistency, and getting back out there to fight the good fight.

Savaaage · 2020-11-15T01:04:26+00:00

Drop her

changy15 · 2020-11-15T05:23:57+00:00

It’s crazy seeing these stories. A good friend of mine(female) did everything she could to get her man on his purpose and off drugs and to be better for himself, he never did so she left eventually but she gave him 4 years of good sex and love before she left. Maybe there are outlier women or it was because it was her first relationship idk. When I see these stories it just makes me wonder how men don’t see these things coming a mile away based on their personality alone.

I can smell an apathetic whore from 10 miles.

MarylandLion · 2020-11-15T01:03:54+00:00

Best to show the emotion to find out shes a horrible woman than to hide it and not find out

Homiz88 · 2020-11-15T12:32:22+00:00

Fuck this she is nothing, you should be only focused on the only one who matters it’s your mom.

And I will tell you it’s a good thing you avoided that succubus I is only here for your good moments and not your bad ones .

Channel_oreo · 2020-11-15T15:19:55+00:00

She probably not attracted to you physically or financially enough for her to invest time with you. Maybe you attracted her through your cocky personality but women want more than that. Just focus on your mom for a while maybe if you ignore her she will probably come back.

2020-11-15T15:51:42+00:00

Happened to my buddy recently. The most natural idgaf dude I know, he had 2 deaths in his family recently during covid and he showed some emotional weakness to his recently engaged gf and then it slowly went downhill. Dont know the details but im sure her pussy dried up when he needed her for emotional support.

TheRedPillRipper · 2020-11-15T00:06:53+00:00

you can’t show any emotional weakness

Of course you can. You just have to be discerning when, and where.

For example I come from a culture where Domestic Violence is still acceptable. That said in my LTR of 6+ years the number times I’ve lost my cool, or just screamed or at my current is 0. The amount of times I’ve felt that way? Triple digits.

I consciously choose instead to go hit the heavy the heavy bag. Or run a mile. As opposed to throwing my partner through the wall. It’s not easy. Especially when you’ve been conditioned since childhood to accept violence as a norm. Same goes for sadness. Depression. Misery.

There are numerous beneficial alternatives to being emotional open with your partner. Training. Personally Running and Boxing’s great. Journaling. Getting pissed with the boys. Poetry. A great method in still mastering is simply Breathing through my emotions. Keep trying and honing different processes until you’ve mastered several that work.

Godspeed and good luck!

Spirited-Foot · 2020-11-15T03:17:58+00:00

Drop her man. This chick is a low tier, low value chick. Seriously.

Mykguy2 · 2020-11-15T03:18:27+00:00

I find that this is real but the more stable of a woman you have... the more she can handle you being unstable.

used2befast · 2020-11-15T13:11:46+00:00

Fuck her. My mother got stage IV cancer in 2016 and battled it 3 fucking years. I spent the last 40+ days of her life by her bedside in the hospital 9 hours a day only to have my fucking cunt of an ex wife to divorce rape me and take the kids from me.

Mother > Any whore

djc_tech · 2020-11-15T14:16:56+00:00

Go through my post history and you'll see I've said it many many times before....no one cares about your feelings if you're a guy. They don't. Women in particular. I'm going to let you in on two true stories here, one involves myself. Also for the record, any time a women says " you can open up to me" it's not what they mean. What they mean is "I want information from you to judge whether I'm going to stick around or not and possibly use it against you later". Remember that.

First story, a good friend of mine I've known for years dad got cancer, and died. He struggled, got depressed and of course was in a bad place. Not even two weeks later his then wife asked for a divorce. Think about that, two weeks. Did she care? Did she give one iota of a fuck for this struggles? Nope...he was an inconvenience to her plans so he had to go. Think this is uncommon? It's not, I have more stories like that than you think.

Second was my own. I struggled, had bad depression, tried to end my life twice. Wen through a divorce, my dog died and other family issues and all I got for it? My ex trying to use it against me in court on how I am unfit to parent.

The hard reality is they don't care, you 've learned a very hard lesson. Hopefully it's one you remember and keep with you. When you struggle or having issues suddenly you're a problem and if it interferes with their "laugh love live" bullshit worldview they don't want you around. Guys naturally try to solve issues to make things better - generally it's what we do. It's not the same for women, unless you're an asset to them they're done. I recently had a friend I know who was former military and worked his ass off for his wife. No kids thankfully, but he walked in on his wife on her back and some dude balls deep. Her excuse? The typical he was always gone (he travelled a lot) and that he was constantly stressed out. Your LTR's behahviour shouldn't surprise you, expect it as the norm.

IntrepidLawyer · 2020-11-15T08:21:26+00:00

A [proper garden tool] ex of mine "did not want to leave" me because my grandmother was dying at the time "and it would make her look bad" by doing that at the same time.

And I did not lose frame at all, I acted more or less the same as before. Anything which changes her perception of you as perfect will be used as an excuse to whore around.

Too bad I was able to read her chats with her best friend (guys, beware if you really want to read those chats, as you will change your perspective on all females and see them for what they really are): where she's describing how it would make her look bad and inconvenienced her while also describing who is she already putting out to in the meantime.

OttoVonBismark71 · 2020-11-14T23:49:02+00:00

A man showing weakness is like a woman showing she gained some weight. It's not her fault she's not as attracted. Obviously, of course, different girls are going to act differently. I personally wouldn't drop a girl just because she had gained 15 lbs after her mother dies. However, some guys would, just as some girls would drop a guy for crying when his dog dies.

psypD · 2020-11-15T01:19:18+00:00

No you can't . And it is totally fine.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=unkIVvjZc9Y

willwang2020 · 2020-11-15T03:22:05+00:00

That’s the hard bitter truth bro. I also experienced something like that. Just never give that bitch a fuck

harrypoppy1 · 2020-11-15T03:35:00+00:00

So if she asks why you’re down how should you respond?

Robin2Fast2Furious · 2020-11-15T04:16:09+00:00

This would not even be on my mind right now. Mom >>>>>> (Random) Girl ???

-ThePathIsTheGoal- · 2020-11-15T06:21:53+00:00

Let this be a learning experience and just accept it for what it is. We’ve been conditioned to think that girls would never do this and that they’re such sweet and angelic souls. When we find out they’re not, it hurts. So, we must not expect them to be. When we don’t expect the compassion in the first place, then we’re not let down.

Fuck this girl. Sending a lot of positive thoughts towards you and your mom. You guys got this 👊

ntkstudy44 · 2020-11-15T06:39:04+00:00

In my opinion I think there might be a bit more to it... if she’s attracted to you than she’d jump on the opportunity to feel valued as a consoler to you.

You can talk about your feelings to girls, just don’t be dependent about their responses, say it to say it. Not to get pitty

AceMav21 · 2020-11-15T06:48:05+00:00

These bitches aren’t equipped to empathize with heavy shit like that. They expect you to act the way they would in that situation. So they find comfort in leaving the situation...

TheMoyel · 2020-11-15T09:18:15+00:00

That is a low quality woman. Kick her to the curb. She's trash.

Unlikely_Composer · 2020-11-15T11:42:42+00:00

The amount of comments in this thread telling similar stories should be a real eye-opener for you. I’d tell my story too but I don’t think it’d actually add any value now.

Look after your mother. She’s (probably) the last woman who will ever love you unconditionally.

It’s a bitter pill, but it’s the truth.

Best of luck, UC

Wave94 · 2020-11-15T12:41:53+00:00

“ As long as you love your mother don’t ever love a woman”

twistymctwister · 2020-11-15T18:43:25+00:00

That's weird the opposite happens to me my girl got clingier when I showed emotion for the first time . Different bitches different strokes I guess most will react like that

GymSharkPornstar · 2020-11-16T00:02:50+00:00

I’d argue that you didn’t screen her properly, my pre trp days I would subconsciously pre screen plates that I saw as ltr material to see if they were emotionally supportive, and I still do but I’m more conscious of it. I ended out with an ltr that saw me have huge mental breakdowns, fluctuations of self esteem, etc and it never had an affect on her attraction/commitment towards me as long as I was staying in my own frame

I also do this with male friends and I notice they do the same w me

akihonj · 2020-11-15T00:35:21+00:00

Well harsh lesson learned then. Now you know and you that no matter what anybody tells you your own experience has taught you something else.

2020-11-15T01:05:31+00:00

Yep happened to me with an LTR last year, even when I knew better. I slipped for just a moment one night and she went from red hot to a disappearing act. Smh

kittenssavedmylife · 2020-11-15T02:00:28+00:00

yeah,

have had this literal scenario happen.

sucks balls.

PokeyTifu99 · 2020-11-15T02:24:05+00:00

All your attention isn't about her anymore, so she's outa there.

tolstushki701 · 2020-11-15T03:23:12+00:00

Never ever open up. It never ended good for me and I doubt it’ll end good for anyone else. You can open up to your brother or a good friend but never tell the girl about your feelings especially something that makes you “weak”.

Musicgoon · 2020-11-15T05:20:21+00:00

That chick is a cunt. There's something seriously wrong with that one buddy. If she can't understand why you're upset, she's strait garbage. You dodged a bullet.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2020-11-15T05:20:29+00:00

“The Skipper always knows what to do.”

L2diy · 2020-11-15T05:31:14+00:00

No you can’t. That’s what guy friends are for.

daproest1 · 2020-11-15T05:48:41+00:00

NOPE. Zero. Most of us have learned this the hard way. Disclaimer: I only read the title

NakedMoleHamster · 2020-11-15T06:07:20+00:00

This girl is a walking red flag - RUN

HoedownInBrownTown · 2020-11-15T07:40:00+00:00

Depending in her age and maturity level, she might have been scared off thinking she wouldn't be able to deal with someone dealing with the shit you're going through. Some women never grow up, and aren't able to have a mature conversation, or provide actual support. I'm sure she has told her friends to open up in the past when they were down, and it would turn out they're dealing with a boy who might not like them or feeling self conscious about their hip dips or whatever, not something serious at all. Maybe to this girl those things are big deals too, so when you open up with something that actually matters she hides away from it. Some people can't handle genuine feelings and honest interactions with other people, only meaningless bollocks and fake celebrity nonsense. She might be one of those people.

kmf01 · 2020-11-15T07:45:57+00:00

I dont know if all of you just come across shitty people in general. Or cant vet them or both. I have the opposite experience and when I shared my vulnerability their attraction and our connection increased. Or when I was injured my ex took care of me doing everything she can, during which she still wanted to fuck etc.

Just my 2c

Warframe_Immortal · 2020-11-15T08:49:33+00:00

Very similar experience - my grandmother died a few years back, and my gf then the day of the funeral or before I'm not sure told me she wants to break up.

damiksta93 · 2020-11-15T09:14:24+00:00

Total lack of humanity. Fucking disgraceful. Hope your mum pulls through brother. Stay strong

4everrekt · 2020-11-15T10:18:41+00:00

Two things:

First, how to deal with the situation with your mom. There's a philosophy called stoicism that I think you should look into. "This too shall pass," is a representative mantra, as is the Serenity Prayer.

The goal of this philosophy is not to never feel emotion, but to see reality for what it is, to handle it accordingly, and to have the resolve to do what must be done, especially during hard times. I'm sure you realize that your mother may die soon, and you MUST be prepared to deal with it, there's no other viable option.

Everyone's time comes to an end eventually, no need to debate that. It's likely more prudent to enjoy the time that you have left with her.

I sincerely hope that you can find a way to see this in a an optimistic light, such as "She'll no longer have to stress/worry over facets of the material world. What can be better than a peaceful respite after years of doing good work?"

You'll get through this my man. It's likely that members of your family will look to you for strength, be strong for them.

Andgelyo · 2020-11-15T11:09:44+00:00

Dump the bitch. As others have said, your mother will always be there for you, and you need to be there for her now too. Women come and go. Family is forever.

nothsadent · 2020-11-15T11:24:26+00:00

Just a case of low quality here.

Thinkingard · 2020-11-15T11:56:18+00:00

At least you aren't married to her or have a longer history. It's always difficult for men to accept women abandoning their loved ones because most men would never even think of such a possibility. I personally believe a lot of women do this because they are, deep down, still children. They've been taken care of all their life, had all their emotional needs met, and it's left them extremely weak, so they break down at the first actual hardship in life. One of the great benefits of being a man is having self-respect and self-reliance.

ThatOneTy · 2020-11-15T14:33:15+00:00

Just a straight up woman moment.

GhostPlanet7 · 2020-11-15T14:38:27+00:00

Thanks for sharing this👌🏼

jackandjill22 · 2020-11-15T16:55:00+00:00

Lesson learned. These people aren't your friends dude. Treat them how they want to be treated.

twistymctwister · 2020-11-15T18:45:31+00:00

Btw sorry about your mom I hope she gets better

Nergaal · 2020-11-15T19:13:24+00:00

You were a bit lucky. When I did something similar, my phone got blocked less than 24h later.

Thunderbird93 · 2020-11-15T19:18:07+00:00

The problem here is that you trusted her. Maybe its because I'm a paranoid schizophrenic but I see that as the main problem. As long as you dont trust a chick then your not emotionally available bro

SeasonedRP · 2020-11-15T19:33:50+00:00

Those deluded souls who want to get married so they can have some loving woman care for them in their old age should pay attention to this post and the comments of those with similar experiences. Ain't gonna happen.

OneTrueQ · 2020-11-15T19:43:12+00:00

Prayers up for ya mom dukes man 🖤
Let’s define emotional weakness before we jump to any conclusions. I would define it as simply crumbling under pressure. Have you?
Dude let me be honest - this girl just a bitch. Not all women are gonna be this incredibly insensitive/retarded, though you can expect most attractive young women to be, because they think they are above it all.

YES, AWALT. But to differing degrees.

Lesson? Learn to read women better. You probably could have vetted more aggressively. I vetted my LTR very aggressively because I was at a point where I truly did not care. I have definitely “opened up” in a way to my LTR. Reasonably, though. THIS is a reasonable situation bruh. Don’t wife a bitch unless she is a ride or die.

6rownboi · 2020-11-15T23:28:22+00:00

bitches really aint shit boys

KidBrody77 · 2020-11-16T01:11:29+00:00

This has be studied heavily. Research shows statistically a woman is most likely to leave you or cheat on you after you have experienced....

A job loss.
A major illness.
A major life trauma like the death of a parent or child.

That's not an opinion. That's a fact. Women don't care about your struggles boys. They wait at the finish line and pick the winners. Lean on your social circle of male friends, your siblings, your family, but don't use women for emotional support. They view it as weak and weakness is the #1 attraction killer for women.

Sob0o · 2020-12-14T14:35:40+00:00

you will be good man, for now be by side of your mom.

Pyadyne · 2021-01-05T02:38:55+00:00

Same thing happened when I cried to my ex about my Brother being murdered. These hoes have no soul bro

AngTheEphemeral · 2020-11-15T01:44:17+00:00

Can't comment in everyone, but you definitely shouldn't ever LTR this woman, keep her as a bottom tier plate if anything.

Anitaliandude · 2020-11-15T15:51:58+00:00

These stories always manage to make me laugh with a morbid passion.

Human nature man.

aegeaorgnqergerh · 2020-11-15T00:06:43+00:00

This sounds like a you problem. There's something you're not telling us.

sportsdude523 · 2020-11-15T00:47:13+00:00

don't falsely attribute things like a feminazi.

you don't know why she left. this might be the reason. it might not.

confirmation bias is not the right way.

but, i will say that a comment points out what's right: emotino is ok, just show you're not defeated by them.

Title	Wow, you really can't show any emotional weakness at all, can you?
Author	thyexorcist
Upvotes	554
Comments	141
Date	November 14, 2020 11:19 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/jubhk2/wow_you_really_cant_show_any_emotional_weakness/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/wow-you-really-cant-show-any-emotional-weakness-at.733388 https://theredarchive.com/post/733388