Ask BaM

GM3d6 · 2014-05-10T01:21:54+00:00

Male who has lost everything from marriage and subsequent divorce. I'm wondering how to recover, I'm a college student with 44 credits in a 90 cred course, I'm saving toward my next car and I'm living with people but I've lost most of my my drive after the divorce. I have little sexual interest in women but I don't know where to find the drive to really do anything substantial I feel so empty at times.

Without my dogs I really wouldn't care about anything.

BaM how do I remove this foul cloud and do better with my life?

schnitzelcfc · 2014-05-10T13:51:12+00:00

I am 19 and while I consider myself quite adept in different aspects of life I am a wreck socially. I am scared of people and I dislike them because of which I am also constantly jealous of them. At times I consider myself inferior to them even though secretly I ridicule them and mock them. It has resulted me having no social confidence and I'd rather spend time hiding at home. Help.

GaiusScaevolus · 2014-05-10T02:10:57+00:00

[permanently deleted]

schwingaling · 2014-05-10T21:32:23+00:00

What would you all recommend for me to do for a gap year. So far I'm certain that I will have driving lessons do the test, then go to spain and learn spanish while learning the material for level one of the CFA program.

I'm from the UK, but Mum is "Canarian" (Las Islas Canarias) so I have spanish family near where I could stay that haven't segregated themselves from the locals like british expats tend to do, because they're not English. Travelling around the world sounds like a bullshit way to have fun and get nothing done via wasting a ton of money. I really just want to learn important useful skills.

I can give more info if it will help answer but for now there's no point.

Hot-Butter · 2014-05-11T00:55:48+00:00

How can I develop a consistent work ethic?

swordblade · 2014-05-21T19:42:42+00:00

Quick question,

I have trouble meditating anyone have some awesome resources that would assist me?

Narrowminded · 2014-05-10T01:46:54+00:00

Talk to me about LDRs (Long-Distance Relationships) in excess of 1000 miles away (same country, though). Let's throw up a scenario which is disturbingly accurate to what I am currently experiencing, with some alterations here and there to try and get the point across:

I'm a guy, mid-twenties, and have recently fallen for a girl a little over 3 months ago. Online. I have not spent much time searching for women in closer proximity to me because, well, I wasn't really looking to be in a relationship and kind of more-or-less stumbled into this one. My love for this individual is nothing short of insanity given the short time-frame we've known each other and considering how we have never met in person.

We have spoken to each other and seen each other through pictures, video, webcam, whatever. The attraction is completely and undeniably present in terms of both personality and appearance. However, I recognize that LDRs are a risk, and I may not get the chance to meet this person for another year - it'd be even longer before I could even think about moving to be closer to this person. Which brings me to my next point.

The plan is that I'm the one to be moving closer to them, not the other way around, due to a contrast in obligations (she simply has more obligations to be where she is than I do, and I'm more willing to make sacrifices). How much of a potential trap am I walking into?

Being with this person, I have spent no time searching for potential women closer to me, and will be sacrificing a year or two of my life before I can actively spend time with her in-person. Should I try to see people on the side just in case I can find someone that's better and more immediate, or should I stick with what I've got because I have feelings for her?

Overzealous_BlackGuy · 2014-05-18T00:13:17+00:00

i'm with a 30 yr old woman and im 20, how do i know if she takes me seriously enough, as a man and not a young adult.

I live at home because I got downsized out the airforce but I have a job with a union as a pipefitter, She met me when i was jobless and 30 pounds heavier. I told her i was looking for a job and trying to get in shape. here i am 30 lbs lighter and gainfully employed to the job I was aiming for. She's very self centered and thinks she's above everyone... It's why i like her She has my horrible traits that i'm working to get rid of.

referring to the self centered trait , her and I both tend to only show genuine respect for people who feel are equals or are above us. i guess values are subjective

Title	Ask BaM
Author	GaiusScaevolus
Upvotes	7
Comments	27
Date	May 10, 2014 1:16 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/becomeaman
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/becomeaman/comments/256c54/ask_bam/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/becomeaman/ask-bam.137436 https://theredarchive.com/post/137436