I've had an example of a fling that didn't quite turn out well.

Says she does an activity I'm heavily in, tennis. Tried to invite her and even practiced at her place (2nd date) found out that she doesn't even commit or has yet to get back in shape.

Irks me to see that she has tennis in her profile but hasn't actually put it in her lifestyle.

Got awkward when I mentioned my recent tennis match with a current friend, acquaintance. She herself hasn't come out or put any effort into going to events I've mentioned.

She's a goner now. But I'd mind if this is actually the right question to ask after the first phone call or before the 1st date.

The thing is I also like keeping things open, but it's so weird to navigate. Especially when I'm going on multiple dates and haven't mentioned that I have plates.

At first, is it a good idea to ask what she's actually looking for? What if her profile (for example) doesn't mention anything about exclusivity. Is it better for us to keep things vague?