Some of this will be old news to some readers.

Let's be completely honest for a moment. Getting out of an LTR many times, sucks at first. Especially if you were the one who was dumped, or the woman suddenly went all Mr. Hyde on you and gave you no other choice. The road too recovery does not have to be long and arduous though. But it needs proper focus, or else an old relationship can throw you off kilter for longer than necessary.

There are two major aspects of getting over a woman.

1:) Getting with other women. This one is obviously discussed to death on this sub. What many guys don't want to acknowledge about this part, is that if you were tied down for a while and only with the one woman, your "game" is going to suck. Or at least be a little bit rusty. Quite frankly, there is no way around this. Only through it.

What I mean by that, is that a lot of guys will sit back down, dust off the cold copy of "The Game" and try to study up before getting back into it. Although it's good to read up here and there and give yourself reminders about things that may have worked for you in the past, you ultimately have to go out there and eat shit a few times before you get back into a groove. The mistake for many is that they see this as an obstacle to getting where they want to be back too. It's not an obstacle, it's part of the road to recovery. It's completely necessary for many of us. So just do it. It's not as painful as it sounds. Just like if you haven't been too the gym in months, you're going to be sore as hell that first week back. Speaking of which....

2:) Prong two is free-time management. Lots of posters here advocate going to the gym. Absolutely nothing wrong with that. I think that part of your free time management has to include an increase in some kind of physical exertion. Whether it be lifting weights, martial arts, boxing, etc. I think partaking in combat sports is an incredible boost to the downtrodden male. Even if you simply find something physically competitive, you will find something that is naturally easy to focus on.

Other things need to come into your life as well. You obviously can't work out all the time. Is there a trip you've been wanting to go on? Book the tickets. Maybe you've always wanted to learn how to hangglide but your last GF thought it was too dangerous. Do it now. Books you were interested in but didn't pick up because it clashed with "movie night"? Get readin', son. Day job is a bit of a drag? Go work a couple of nights in a more social setting, bar tending, DJing, etc. (These things coincidentally will help with prong #1 as they open up your social circle/social proof)

Balance of Your New Found Power

So here's the rub.

Both of these things need to be approached equally. Why?

Let's say you focus mostly on prong #1

You're getting right back into your old groove and maybe even got a few phone numbers of cute girls. Maybe you've scored a make out or even got yourself some rebound sex. That's nice.

But then you land another girl. And another. And another etc. All of this is nice and satisfying to the ego (and to your dick). But then you hit a cold streak. No one is answering and your girls have gone AWOL. Getting a new girl at the moment seems tiring so you decided to do something else. Then you realize you haven't done anything else. All you've done is chase pussy. In an attempt to get away from something that was defining your life (forgetting about a girl) you've now defined your life by hooking up with women. You're essentially the same shmoe who got dumped a few months ago, you just have a few more notches in your belt. Though you may have enjoyed yourself at times, you haven't progressed at all in the big scheme of things. You've given women all of your new found energy and time.

Imagine you're talking with your mother. If she says "So what have you been up too lately?" and you sit there in silence, because the only answer is "fucking strippers" you may be leaning too far on prong #1

Going too far with prong #2 can be troublesome as well. Although I honestly think you can lean a bit heavier on this area and get away with it, some caution is still advised.

Becoming so absorbed with everything else that you neglect women entirely may seem like the answer. Men can shut themselves off and drown in hobbies that let them forget all of their previous sorrow. For a while this is a welcome respite. Fixing up your old motorbike and driving across country doesn't seem like it has the same risk as emotionally getting involved with another female. Your backpacking expedition through Manchu Picchu probably won't break your heart for asinine reasons that become rationalized to oblivion. You find yourself enjoying all of this immensely as your new found hobbies consume most of your free time. But then what happens?

You are out and about and see a stunning blonde that you'd love to go introduce yourself too. But you can't bring yourself to do it. Because you've neglected to go through the "Rust Road" that is necessary to get good with women again, you're stuck in chode mode. Or worse yet, the ex comes back and offers to buy you lunch. She's impressed with how well you've done for yourself, and even a bit turned on by your resilience. She hints at hooking up, and you become almost incapable of saying no because you haven't had sex for six months due to writing a screenplay and getting to level 80 on Skyrim in between all of those pull-ups you can now do.

So you fall back in and sleep with her...and she starts hanging around again....oh god no.

So you guys can see why an equilibrium in the recovery process is important. It's imperative to one's development as a man that he is able to partake in these endeavors in a responsible manner in a way that is conductive to his life as a whole, and not just one aspect or in a manner than shuns one desire in favor of all others.

The two prongs. Or the two pills?

"Girl broke your heart, son? Take two of these and call me in the morning..."