"This is a new throwaway account, but I'm weeally weaaally redpill! Make an exception to the new user filter just for meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"

No.

The new user filter is there for a reason. And we're not going to make extra work for ourselves circumventing it because you pinkie-swear you're just the nicest person evar. If you're serious about using a new account, put in the time.

"How DARE you ban me you incel faggot cuck child beta loser! I demand to be reinstated at once, or I will make this public to all 15K people in PurplePillDebate! Fear the bad publicity! Ahahahahahaahahahahh!"

Maybe you told an EC he was a "faggot". Maybe you wrote a long moral lecture about how it's wrong to sex up married girls. Maybe you told another user to "go kill himself".

Or maybe I just fucking clicked on the wrong name. It's happened.

But all of that doesn't matter now, because being an ass in modmail gets you banned, too.

"Why did you remove my post?? I thought it was good!"

For the love of Invisible Space Jesus, WHAT post? I remove ten or twenty posts a day. Who are you? What you talking about? Give me a link to follow, for fuck's sake.

"Here's a six page description of a problem I have! Please please please help me!"

We did help you, asshat. We created an entire group of subreddits, for the sole purpose of helping you, and we tended them, and cared for them until they grew to a quarter of a million people, all available to share their insights and experiences with you. But nnoooooooooo, that's not good enough for you, you have to get personal attention from us, in your own private white-glove service chat, because you're a special snowflake, and you have special needs, and mommy always said you were special. Except you're not.

So fuck off.

"What do you think of this post? {Paste six pages.} I think it will change the entire world forever!"

We think it doesn't belong in modmail, because posts don't go in modmail, genius.

"{You/we/the sky fairies} should make a post about {thing}! Here's a link! Get cracking!"

Be the change you wish to see in the world. Start writing. Impress us all.

"I'm going to start a chat server, and advertise it on your group, and there's nothing you can do to stop me!"

You are not going to doxx our users, and just watch us.

"I can just make a new account!"

That's nice. We can ban with two clicks, in five seconds. Have fun getting each new account over the new user filter!

"Hey, what are the time/karma/other requirements on the new user filter?"

If we wanted you to know, we would have told you.

"I am a dark triad personality! Fear me! Give in to my demands!"

What, and you think we're not an entire allied pack of intelligent high-functioning psychopaths? Bring it, kid.

"You are a bunch of psychopaths! Disband this misogynist group at once, or I shall report you to {reddit/google/the FCC/Nancy Pelosi/the karma police/my mom}!"

What, you think we're literally a bunch of psychopaths? Lighten up, kid.

"The Brood Mothers! They SING to us! Can you not hear their song? Soon the oceans will rise up, and the Space Rabbits shall return from the Purple Sector!"

Take your medication.