I used to work with a girl named “Ciara” at a retail store. We worked together for about 3 years. During that time she was very very attractive and your typical college girl. Slept around a lot while saying she wanted a long term committed relationship and eventual marriage but still just fucking around.

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I, on the other hand, was a fat virgin video game playing comic book reading boy. I orbited her for years. I drove her around in my car and talked to her about her boyfriends and shit. And I never understood why she didn’t like me. I just couldn’t see what I was not why the world reacted to me the way it did.

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I’m leaving out a lot of details about me because they aren’t exactly relevant to this specific story, but Ciara moved away after college and we remained friends in social media. We never spoke anymore but we’re still friends/followed each other.

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About a year after she was gone I hit my lowest low and was very close to suicide. I can’t remember if it was Reddit or somewhere else, but I remember someone making the argument to me that I had nothing to lose anymore and to just spend one year lifting, reading a few books and internalizing the lessons they tried to teach, and eventually building a better wardrobe. The typical advice that’s doled out on a daily basis, nothing magical.

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I don’t know why, but I just decided to try it. I was probably scared of death and saw this as a way to procrastinate, honestly.

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At any rate, a few months passed and I started to see progress. I was 340lbs when I started at 5’10”. Literally for about 6 months, I would just sit in my car outside the gym and I’d have to force myself to get out and go in. I was embarrassed and ashamed of myself to have gotten so big and disgusting.

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I’m proud of the fat that each day, I did it. I got out of the car and went in, did my workout, and read a bit of the books that were suggested to me.

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I still had low and difficult days, but I was moving forward.

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Fast forward. 150lbs gone. Diet infinitely better. Wardrobe is much much better. And as a result, I feel more confident because of the mountain I’d just climbed and I also look a hell of a lot better. My dad was 100% a “Chad” to the point where one of his more unstable “plates” literally murdered him.

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And with all that work, I finally unearthed what I inherited from him as far as genetics go. I lost my virginity and was dating and had friends and hobbies and got a new career. So yeah. That all worked.

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But then one day I posted some photos on my Facebook of me the day I got hired by my airline to celebrate. There were pics of me in uniform and of me at the gym and it was basically an album of photos that showed me how far I’d come.

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I posted this to share with friends and family because I felt very proud of what i had accomplished.

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Guess who commented and then messaged me.

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Ciara.

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She messaged me and complimented the progress, was super interested in my new career, said we should catch up. At first I was thinking, oh, she’s just being a friend. She legit just wants to catch up. That’s cool.

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I was already about to be in Chicago for a wedding shortly so yeah, let’s get together, Ciara. I fucked her literally every single day I was in Chicago. She came to MY hotel.

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Again, maybe it’s the naive “blue pill” kid in me, but I thought that was it. But she kept texting me and snapping me nudes and talking about sex and I’d rarely respond because I’m not going to Chicago just for sex.

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So she gets mad one day and sends one of those passive aggressive texts saying she hopes I had fun using her and turning into an asshole. I was already annoyed at the time so I responded saying I’m not interested in a long distance relationship and I’m not coming all the way to Chicago for sex.

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Immediately she changes her tune and is apologetic and does that baby thing where she apologizes and admits she’s wrong but still wants to look like the innocent baby. Women do that shit a lot.

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So then she says that she knows I said I wasn’t interested in a long distance relationship, but what if she came down here. So I said, “it’s not like I wouldn’t let you in if you showed up at my door.”

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And she actually made that ~300 mile drive in the winter to come to my house and fuck me. I legitimately could not believe it when she was snapping me pictures of her driving.

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I never met my dad but I half way wanted to call him and say “you’re not gonna fucking believe this”

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The gas, the day off of work, the mileage on her car, it’s fucking cold outside...just for dick...but it wasn’t just for dick.

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Because guess who wants to “try the long distance thing”?

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“You’re a pilot you can be in Chicago anytime you want. We already know each other you can just stay with me while you’re up here and we can play house together and see what happens.”

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That’s a literal quote from a text she sent me.

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There is not a single chance I would ever ever ever date Ciara. She’s boring to talk to and not even all that hot, just a nice body and decent face. And a nasty attitude when she’s not happy.

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And, just like I couldn’t see that I was a fat unattractive slob, she can’t see she’s one of the most unappealing relationship prospects ever. I’m 26. She’s 28, turning 29 in July. She has a super slutty background and a nasty attitude and she’s extremely materialistic. I guess this is the downside to wanting your former orbiter. I know too much.

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So I told her I wasn’t interested in any relationship. And just like I continued to offer my time and money and friendship years ago, she’s planning on coming back down to stl in a couple weeks to fuck for another weekend when we’re both off.

I wasn’t even aware of The Red Pill until recently but my relationship with Ciara and the way it played out is insanely textbook so I felt compelled to share it.

To the younger men reading, it works. People can call it hateful or toxic or sexist or pathetic or whatever...but it works.

And if it’s stupid, but it works, it’s not stupid. Get to work on you and women will make it easy.

Book list EDIT(remember, it’s easier to read than to do. Books are only the first step):

How to Win Friends and Influence People - Dale Carnegie

Meditations (I know it’s a cliche book to suggest at this point, but just fucking read it and internalize the lessons. Again, it works.) -Marcus Aurelius

Make Your Bed- Admiral McRaven (this one is the shortest and easiest to read. Straight to the point and clear. Possibly my favorite lesson I’ve learned is from this book. It’s the chapter on “sugar cookies”. It’s worth buying just for that lesson, in my opinion.)