Shit or Comfort Test ??

MRPguy · 2015-11-09T19:13:47+00:00

Would your parents not watch the older 2 children also?

Did you cum inside of her or not? Your wording isn't clear. You cum too early, how do you think your LTR feels about that?

"...so get YOUR kids in line." She is your LTR, so either get committed or get out. The kids are part of the package deal. Get them in line and be the family alpha.

Maybe she is actually not feeling well and doesn't have the energy to tend to the children all day? Everybody deserves a break in the action every now and then.

Maybe it is a shit test and she is being lazy. You know her better than any of us.

Why the 3-week span between sex? That's the real question here that needs to be focused on. I would suspect that if you were a HV Man she wouldn't have fallen asleep watching TV.

The real question then is how you are getting along at working on YOU? What improvements have you made? How is your body fat%? What reading have you done? I want to know more about you. She is a mirror of you.

alphabeta49 · 2015-11-09T19:49:46+00:00

LTR wasn't feeling well wavering on going or not , but I just [...] took control

She's feeling sick or coming down with something, and you still decide to go out and drink? Good job leading, poor choice of direction.

2 monsters all day" I don't reply , and don't say anything when I get home

Good work not letting it get to you, but it sounds like she's genuinely stressed. More on this later...

get YOUR kids in line

Abso-fucking-lutely not. You better be thanking sweet baby Jesus you didn't actually let those words come out of your mouth. You're the man of the house so you need to step up to the commitment you signed on for, including the kids. Swiping her feet out from under her and abandoning her with the kids would have been a dirty move. The only exception is if she turned her bitchiness on you. Which it sounds like on the surface ("why do I have to be stuck..."). But reading between the lines, its not a personal attack. Its an indicator of built-up pressure that needs to be released.

My wife gets incredibly stressed being a SAHM and regularly says she needs a day or evening off. But when the time comes to take it off, she doesn't like to leave her kids. Its a noble sentiment that she's so attached to them, but it gets in the way of her self care. She doesn't know what she wants, and certainly doesn't know how to get it. Talk about directionless and being swayed by her own emotions.

So I sometimes have to get firm with her. "Look, you've been saying you're burnt out from being with the kids 24/7. I'm banishing you from this house for the next two hours. Go find a coffee shop and read, call a friend up, go browse the mall. I don't care. But go and spend time away. You need it."

As the man of the house it is your job to see your crew members' morale and take charge to keep everything on an even keel. I'm not saying you need to play comforter, but you certainly need to know when to tell her to go to shore for some alone time. Not go hands-off right when she needs leadership the most.

Then after you lead her out of the minefield, address her tone if you really need to. "I know you were stressed, but its not respectful nor a good example when you imply that I am to blame for you being stuck with those monsters." But again, it doesn't sound like she was directing any venom at you.

Venge97RI · 2015-11-09T20:08:47+00:00

Neither, it was complaining.

either you're a shithead because you're useless, or you're a shithead because shes scared of losing you.

BluepillProfessor · 2015-11-10T16:48:16+00:00

It's a comfort test. You pass by listening sympathetically and nodding your head as if you are actually listening to her moans and bitching.

Also, WHY are you 'getting her off' with your hands if you pop off early. Hold her in your arms. Make out with her. Rub your spent dick on her pussy. Then when you are ready again do it for longer- cum inside her and then go to sleep with her in your arms.

Do NOT ask her what she wants, apologize for popping early, or give her a chance to go to sleep until round 2.

Venge97RI · 2015-11-10T14:23:38+00:00

Thanks everyone for the replies. Basically this is where I am now. The Relationship is stale and on life support. its the same shit every day , I'm shouldering the workload , while she gets to sit around and do nothing , watch some Mindless Kardashian shit , or play games on her phone.

There are a couple of Glaring issues that stick out at me. Number 1 , and I think the biggest is her decision to work the hours she works. She generally gets in around 9, and leaves between 6:30 and 7 PM , getting home around 7:30-8 PM , now her office ( medical office) closes at 5.. so I don't know what's being done from 5-7 PM , and I don't see it making a significant addition to her pay. This forces me to run the show every night, Get the kids , clean up whatever mess wasn't done in the AM. make dinner , clean up that mess , make sure homework gets done, etc.. I don't have a problem doing it , if it provided a tangible benefit , but so far , I havnt seen that benefit . the Possiblity of a Chad at the office for a couple hours a night has been in my thoughts. Without her working these hours and picking up the kids would lessen the nearly $1500 bucks a month we're spending on childcare

Issue 2 is the Finances , currently they are separate , which though it works , the view of the incomes is " my income my money" so when I pay what I pay. if im tight at the end to put gas in the car or whatever she views it as " helping me" because I cant budget. but when she doesn't pay the gas or electric for whatever reason , it falls on me to pay it. I want to change this by depositing both paychecks into a joint account , and I do all the bills for the house , giving us each an amount of disposable income per week. I know combined we make enough to get by, but we need to work together if we're gonna be a family . I have opened a joint account at a credit union , but she is currently stonewalling me on getting the bank her documents(SSN Card, address verification) to open the account.

Issue 3 is the sex life. its nowhere near as frequent as I need it.. I have the clue app , and based on that its averaging 3-4 times a month.. though when it happens its not really starfish, we don't do the same kinky stuff we used to do when we were dating ( IE Toys , positions, anal, light bondage) I think some of it is that the kids are home with us 24/7 where when we dated they had visitation with their father every other weekend. so we could spend a whole day or weekend in bed doing the stuff she doesn't want her kids walking in and seeing. I do try to initiate every other night, and when rejected just roll over and read or go to sleep .

I do feel the infrequency of sex is what's causing my issue with cumming too fast. When we didn't live together , I rubbed one out every day , sometimes twice a day, when I was with her on the weekends I could go forever , and sometimes not finish at all. Living in this situation doesn't give me the alone time I need to do that now.

The way I see it.. she's hot to get us hitched , went from showing me this $9,000 dollar engagement ring she loved , to now finding $90 dollar rings online that she strongly hints at, seemingly dropping her standards to just get any ring. but im not doing it until the above 3 items get better. we'll be at 6 years together on Friday , 4 years living together , things didn't start dropping off till about 2 years ago when we had our baby

and I do see the posts below about do I lift , hobbies , time out of the house with men .etc... the answer is no. Right now for me Priority one is getting Financially secure. If I cant put gas in the car to get to work all week , there isn't money for going out for a beer , going to the gym , and other stuff. I do have the books in the sidebar on my Phone and laptop and read them when time allows or before bed.

I have made a big change this year by switching jobs from a Contract job with no benefits that I was doing for 4 years , to a full time position with a new company that has full benefits , 401 and stock plan along with a ~20% raise. its a priority

Title	Shit or Comfort Test ??
Author	Venge97RI
Upvotes	0
Comments	14
Date	November 9, 2015 6:46 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/3s5zhg/shit_or_comfort_test/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/shit-or-comfort-test.207924 https://theredarchive.com/post/207924