MRP and Pregnancy

wally592 · 2017-02-17T15:59:24+00:00

I've got five kids with one miscarriage somewhere in the middle there ... ALL OVER THE PLACE MAN.

That's all I can say.

All over the place.

The hair is awesome, and when she feels she's got awesome hair, she feels great. Skin is awesome ... same thing. Tits. Yup. Loved the tits. She loved the tits. Normally a B, so anything more was huge for her view of herself. And the tanks came as well. Tiredness were a big deal for her on later pregnancies. Your wife will obviously be more tired with the second than with the first simply b/c of all the responsibilities from the first. I also find that time of year (ie. winter and February in particular) affect things for my wife. Not getting outside for some sun ... staying in the house all the time. Bad mojo ensues.

I've had the hop off in the middle as well. Don't remember an "icky" response, but I'll be damn if I didn't press on her bladder the wrong way every time I got close to her.

No butthurt from you...That's basically the only thing you really need to worry about right now. All in all, just dabble in the waves of her emotions the way most posts here talk about. In time, you'll need to make sure you're staying the alpha around the house with more kids and more drama. Everything's going to turn into check-boxes that need to get done. Just make a mental note that you make sure you don't turn your gaming and your kids into mere check-boxes as time goes by. It'll need a major revisit from you probably 10 months in the future. Pretty sure that's a major factor that caused me to end up at MRP.

Life_advice_me · 2017-02-17T15:56:04+00:00

It would be good to see a post on this from one of the more senior MRP approved. Myself and other posters on MRP have experienced the wife having a drop in libido with the second pregnancy but not the first. For me, this continued for the year after my child was born as breastfeeding also reduces libido. It was at this time I found MRP, but unfortunately it was also the most difficult period as I had a tired low libido wife. Combine this with the necessary need to provide support around the house and it was a perfect storm. MSLP and MRP gave me the tools to increase desire and initiate but I was an MRP novice and angry because of my feels and wasn't getting the validation I craved from my wife (I was very much a beta blue pill at this time). My advice for what it is worth is to accept that your going to have to work allot harder to create desire and intimacy just to get back to the level you were at. Your playing the "RP on hard mode" in hard mode.

The_Litz · 2017-02-17T12:49:50+00:00

From what I read here she is not refusing you sex, just that your ego took a little hit when she jumped off.

At least you are just a little confused about it and not butthurt. Am I right? Do not sweat it, it is normal. If this happens a year from now.....well then it is a whole other remedy.

You got it tiger.

brick_howse · 2017-02-17T15:33:03+00:00

I'm a lady who's had two children....

Imagine your body had been hijacked by a mind-controlling "zombie" parasite. You're conscious. You're aware. You have zero control. That is what pregnancy is. It's a serious mind-fuck. Some of it is great. Some is awful. And you have no idea what you're going to get. So.... everything you think you know... about your wife, about women, about sex, about pregnancy... just forget it. She's probably just as bewildered by the whole thing as you are.

Like others said, take nothing personally. Just ride it out. She is literally not herself right now. Things will find their way back to your new normal after the baby arrives and she has had some time to recover.

(Related: recovery time can vary from woman to woman and pregnancy to pregnancy. So try not to have any expectations based on how things went after baby #1. After my first, I was back at the gym within a month... I felt great. Tired and overwhelmed, but great. After my second, I had some health complications that took me over a year and a lot of hard work to fully recover from. I'm not sure I would have been able to dig myself out of that hole without my husband's leadership and support.... and unwavering patience.)

RBuddDwyer · 2017-02-17T15:36:59+00:00

Nothing changes during pregnancy. You still act like a man, and you still initiate sex. A lot of times she won't be in the mood, either for logistics, hormonal changes, whatever. That is to be expected, just roll with the punches. Understand that at least some of the time, her unreceptiveness to sex is not directly because of a lack of attraction, so act accordingly. But whatever you do, don't go all beta on her. All you will do is trigger her hindbrain that she fucked up and you are not the real alpha she got pregnant by. You just roll with the punches, and keep working on you.

As a side note, don't write the entire pregnancy off yet. Women do tend to react differently to each pregnancy, and each trimester can be entirely different from the last. Usually, the second trimester is when the libido goes off the charts, as the pregnancy hormones have normalized, yet she is not far enough along that physical discomfort comes into play.

Thomaskingo · 2017-02-17T15:31:36+00:00

When she's pregnant lots of the red pill advice become incorrect. She needs a lot of beta and very little dread if any at all.

UEMcGill · 2017-02-17T15:20:56+00:00

I have 3 kids, and my wife is a tiny woman, so she generally didn't carry easy. Both pregnancies were completely different so no assumptions can really be made. I suspect your first born is a boy? Don't forget she's got the hormones from two people in her. My one data point was my wife felt different with her first, a boy then her second pregnancy, one of each. In her words, "I could tell it wasn't two boys, but also not two girls."

I'm a firm believer in leadership at all times. If your wife is pregnant you need to up the "head of the household" idea. She'll be nesting and with all those hormones she's likely to be a bit whacky. Don't supplicate and give her a sense of entitlement, instead get out your best WISNIFG, and learn how to be that oak in an emotional storm.

Remember there's a big difference between caretaker, and caregiver. Caretakers will start fixing when a problem arises, caregivers let someone know they are there to help if help is needed. Keep your habits up, chores done, etc but jump in if she's struggling. "hey babe, you Ok? Can I help?"

I don't ever believe in supplication for the sake of calming the storm. If she's being a crazy bitch because of pregnancy, that's bad behavior and you need to address it ASAP. If it's just general slow down and effort, well cut her some slack and change the mission, crew safety should always be considered but you are still the captain.

RBuddDwyer · 2017-02-17T19:00:41+00:00

This is where I find it helpful to disconnect sex from the most important things in your life. I made this mistake with my wife, where she felt like shit and had no libido, and almost blew the marriage up because the sex dropped off.

If she's witholding sex or being bitchy, those are problems to be addressed. But if she's making a good effort at being a decent wife, I say cut her some slack and focus on your mission. As always, your mission is your most important priority.

I don't know if I'll ever get my wife pregnant again because it was such a shitshow the first time around.

Title	MRP and Pregnancy
Author	MetalRP
Upvotes	7
Comments	26
Date	February 17, 2017 10:55 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/5ulj4k/mrp_and_pregnancy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/mrp-and-pregnancy.206502 https://theredarchive.com/post/206502