In one of my previous FR I wrote about my going Rambo experience, her losing her shit (sadness and crying not anger).

Since then we have been meeting weekly and doing studies that I've selected. I ensure the lessons are not promoting the feminine imperative but they're not explicitly red pill either (first rule of fight club). I found a book written by a Christian counselor that's based on years of clinical experience. The book includes principals such as, each person needs to take personal responsibility for their behavior, set boundaries etc. It's in Christian/blue pill language but with principals that work.

On the days we do the study I can tell a big difference in her mood. She seems a lot happier. This has made me wonder if we need to develop a red core and a blue exterior. Our Red core causes us to maximize dread and game other women while the blue exterior gives her the comfort she desires.

In the Rational Male Rollo mocks the scene from Something About Mary where the advice given is to jerk it before a big date. That chicks dig a sensitive and honest man and when are you the most honest? Right after sex. The idea Rollo mocks is that what women want an emasculated man (aka a woman). If that is what women really wanted they'd all be lesbians. Women do not want effeminate men. She wants a masculine, sexual man who is sexually attracted to her.

So why are these "therapy dates" working? My guess is because they're not actually blue pill even though it feels like it. There's nothing wrong with working through your marriage problems with your spouse if you're able to not supplicate and apologize and otherwise be in her frame. It creates a safe space for her to share her feelings and grievances. It's an opportunity to bring her into my frame and allow her to feel safe being there.

There's other places in the Rational Male where Rollo suggests you should not share your feelings but in context it appears what he is really saying is you should not decrease your status with your words. You have to ensure you're not decreasing your self worth whiles the same time acknowledging your shortcomings and failures. In order to be humble you must first have high value.

Let me hear your thoughts and experiences. How do you keep the intimacy and love connection without turning into a faggot? How do you maintain the balance between dread and comfort?