27 yrs old, 5’ 7”, 145lbs, BF% 17.25, BMI 22.7, Married 4 years, No kids
Lifts:
Squat - 155lb
BP - 85lb
BBR - 95lb
OHP - 65lb
Deadlift - 115lb
Reading: NMMNG, working through sidebar.
OYS: Currently on week #3.
Sexlife - acceptable
Last year I had some bad anger issues that were causing me quite a bit of trouble. I was regularly, almost routinely, getting into fits of road rage with people on a weekly basis. I had many opportunities where I could have got hurt, hurt someone else, and could have got my wife hurt as she was with me during some of my freak outs. I tried seeking out a psychologist and I did not like it. She put me on medication that made me feel different and unable to feel anything at all. I decided that I would just "lift" and get through this and it worked for a while.
Fast forward another year and I'm back here, still up to my old tricks. Today, a truck with a trailer decided to cut me off and I almost wrecked my car. While I was talking to my wife on the phone, I immediately sped up to the driver of the truck, rolled down my window, and completely threw my frame out the fucking window. My ego was out of control and I just wanted to hurt this guy, which is quite a joke if you look at my stats. I thought that lifting, having lots of sex and going through all of this was going to help me lose that side of me. However, I realize that I have a serious problem and it is completely ego driven. I am just a very angry fucking dude and my fuse is a stub. I am currently going through therapy right now for depression. I am embarrassed that I am going to have to admit that I behaved this way to my therapist the next time I see them. Afterward I knew what I did was wrong and I feel guilty and ashamed that I allowed myself to stoop so low.
I know most of you are not quite in the same situation as I am, but I am sure that some of you must get mad or angry for whatever reason. I don't know what to do about my behavior and I am mentally exhausted. I suppose I am at that point where I am sick and tired of being sick and tired.
Does anyone have any advice on anger management?
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