What's up retards? You guys doing well in here? I figured this place gives me so much entertainment it's time to give back to the community with hard, long data once again. Previous science experiments have yielded retarded results, I expect this one to perform the same. The difference this time is that the control subject is not a retard, but ME. But since I'm posting to /r/askmrp.... I guess that makes me a retard wanting to play in the retard playpen.

In order for me to run this experiment I needed some retarded sexual strategy to test and the methods to test it must be like an autist retard would.

Plus, I really DNGAF because I can recover from any retarded shit damage I cause unlike you fucktards, so...

Let's begin.

The Holy Grail of Cum Science Experiment

I recently came across the Holy Grail of Cum (thanks /u/tyred_biggums) supplement stack. It was on the internet and had a lot of upvotes. For sure it's legit. Do you think this will make my cum more powerful like Chad McThundercock's massive loads he shoots on your wives? Do you think if I shot bigger loads I'd be more attractive to my wife? What other questions can I ask in other people's frame?

So here's the retarded cum-buckets formula:

  • L-Arginine, 1000mg Strength, Taken 1 time daily = 1000mg
  • Zinc, 50mg Strength, Taken 1 time daily = 50mg
  • Pygeum, 100mg Strength, Taken 2 times daily = 200mg
  • Lecithin, 1200mg Strength, Taken 1 time daily = 1200mg

I went to amazon and ordered it all right away. I began day #1 taking the recommended doses, but the man in that post said he leaked pre-cum like a faucet after 5 weeks. So I doubled the doses. All of them.

But here's where the science experiment gets cool: What happens if I don't initiate sex while building up this high performing sweatshop hours semen factory she can smell? What if I don't turn down her need to suck on my dick sometimes, but I don't bust a nut for as long as I can go? Will she love me more? What if I go full autist DNGAF - just STFU and LIFT - and take my cum pills - what will happen? Surely she'll get some dread and think I'm fucking other women. That always works, right?

Well guys, it's been 6 days. I haven't cum in 6 long days and managed to ward off the evil dick witch from busting my nut. This morning I had to pull an Al Copone and evade her blowjob tax by rolling over and pretending to want more sleep. Last night she fell asleep accidently with my dick in her hands.

Wife is generally walking around the house looking defeated and mopey

My general side effects: Weird and strong desires to go day-game HARD. Lots of success already if I wanted it. Dreaming about a sea of imaginary pussy and mentally masturbating to it hard. I'm about ready to bust out a gooey mile-long bullet from my dick and my balls are swollen a bit.

/u/Praexology calls me Hollow Point Horns because he thinks I'm gonna put a hole in the back of her head.

Will report back science experiment data as it intensifies.