How do I respond to girl who forgot we had sex last night?

iknowthewhey · 2018-04-16T02:43:01+00:00

Not something to take lightly. Do you know if she has a boyfriend? How long have you known this girl for? Does anyone else know this happened? If she is worried about her reputation then her text might be her way of getting you to incriminate yourself.

She could potentially be trying to set you up for a false rape. Most likely not but be cautious. I would recommend ignoring the text. If she brings it up just pretend you never saw it.

alpha-zach · 2018-04-16T03:02:14+00:00

This sounds dangerous to me. She obviously knows what happened. “I blacked out” is complete bs.

If her position is she blacked out and you say you screwed, rape nearly guaranteed. Even if she isn’t thinking it now, when her mind starts hamstering or has buyers remorse or her girl friends talk to her it’ll become rape in her mind no matter what the truth is. THEY DONT CARE ABOUT THE TRUTH THEY CARE ABOUT THEIR REPUTATION.

At the least it’s ASD, at the worst metoo incrimination. Women are incredibly gifted at this stuff. You CANT let your guard down and always retain plausible deniability.

I wouldn’t respond by text at all. It’s a written record very hard to undo legally. If you decide to answer at all, it needs to be verbal so if she comes at you with something you can deny you ever said it.

If you have access to someone who can give legal advice, check with them.

If you used a condom, you might want to consider saying in person, “no nothing happened.” If she’s on ASD, she has her plausible deniability, problem solved. If she’s checking to see if you’ll keep it quiet, problem solved. If she has a boyfriend, problem solved.

If you didn’t use a condom, start praying.

Sounds to me like you put your dick in crazy. I’d stay away in the future.

DaftOdyssey · 2018-04-16T03:06:32+00:00

Two words: plausible deniability.

If I can't remember what happened that means I wasn't a slut, right?

DaftOdyssey · 2018-04-16T02:49:37+00:00

Don’t respond at all, it’s an ASD shit test. If you really want to fuck with her, say “Nothing, just kissed.” Then she’ll know you’re lying but won’t be able to say so without exposing her own lie.

MattyAnon · 2018-04-16T11:39:48+00:00

How do I respond to this guys?

DO NOT RESPOND

If you say you had sex, you have just legally confessed to rape.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2018-04-16T04:19:00+00:00

"If we had had sex, I'm sure it would have been memorable."

htbf · 2018-04-16T11:50:49+00:00

"shit I was gonna ask you the same thing but I didn't have your number."

babybopp · 2018-04-16T04:36:25+00:00

Don't admit to it. It is a setup. Getting you to admit to sleeping with her while she was drunk as in her words af. Just be like... nope we didn't, what you take me for!?

sixseven89 · 2018-04-16T07:15:42+00:00

"idk i was drunk too lol"

quieroser · 2018-04-16T12:31:02+00:00

This exact thing happened to me 25 years ago. The right answer: " I blacked out too, and I don't remember shit, have a good day"

WoodWizzy87 · 2018-04-16T04:56:47+00:00

metoo movement. I don’t care how drunk a girl is you know exactly what’s happening. I’ve been hammered like a mother fucker and can retrace my steps to everything I did the whole night.

The whole drunk bullshit is just plausible deniability. Did we, didn’t we I can’t remember. Total bait question over text man. Don’t reply

WithItOrOnIt · 2018-04-16T08:30:54+00:00

Just tell her you were as drunk as her and you don't remember shit neither

Pluglord · 2018-04-16T05:59:08+00:00

Bro. You might be FUCKED.

stylesm11 · 2018-04-16T11:29:54+00:00

Tread carefully, maybe say you had blacked out too

YouLoveThisBTW · 2018-04-16T14:35:16+00:00

“I blacked out too. Don’t remember a thing. Let’s meet up and see if we can jog eachothers memories.”

ElOweTea · 2018-04-16T12:19:31+00:00

Say you blacked out too and don't remember anything either

bobtheseal · 2018-04-16T15:19:04+00:00

I blacked out too .. sorry I don't know..

phenixgold · 2018-04-16T12:07:26+00:00

You dont!

Mr-Ed209 · 2018-04-16T13:54:17+00:00

What a dick move on her part.

Do not respond by text, don't put anything out there in writing. Maybe she has a BF and is trying to mentally let herself off the hook. Maybe she's into you and, badly, trying to gauge wether you're interested in seeing her again.

I'd either not respond entirely or call her and deal with it like the shit test that it is. But whatever you do, do not reply by text and give her any leverage to turn this around on you. She might not cry rape to the police, but she might show her brothers or white knight orbiters and try and stir some drama while dragging your reputation through the mud.

bitchpotatobunny · 2018-04-16T16:52:19+00:00

Whatever you do, don't reply with any answer, especially via text. You really should ignore and hard next her.

However, if you're going to ignore that advice and respond at all, CALL HER (don't text) and say something along the lines of "Let's grab coffee." If she does agree to meet for coffee, then when you meet you can verbally say something along the lines of "I'm also having trouble remembering last night. Let's try retrace our steps. What do you remember?" This leaves her with her plausible deniability, and still doesn't incriminate you. From there you can have a friendly conversation, build some rapport, finish your coffee, and with her and gracefully bow out. It'll leave her feeling less like a slut and less likely to make any false claims. At no time whatsoever do you admit to remembering.

All that being said, really refer back to the first two sentences. You should ignore that shit and hard next.

bitterconsultant · 2018-04-16T23:30:18+00:00

say "lulz I was totally blacked out too, must have been a great night!! let me buy you dinner so we can get to know each other"

This way you switch it to a fun vibe asap and either:

Have dinner, and she willingly went on a date with you after the fact so no credible "rape" allegations can happen after that. You drop her after that and you win.
She sees you as beta for wanting more and just wants to get away, so she rejects you with some lame excuse. You win again.

bluefingerblue · 2018-04-16T02:56:41+00:00

“Just fooled around 😉”

PowerTalk. She knows that you know she knows. Also puts you in a kiss but don’t tell box so she feels like she can do things with you that’ll never get found out.

Fulp_Piction · 2018-04-16T10:39:36+00:00

What difference would it make if you actually had sex? How can she remember that you 'fooled around' but 'blacked out'?

PhaedrusHunt · 2018-04-16T18:25:33+00:00

We held hands and though pure thoughts.

DntPnicIGotThis · 2018-04-16T18:40:22+00:00

don't

econquest · 2018-04-16T18:57:57+00:00

man kids these days. take the following with a huge grain of salt. I'm just a TRP beginner.

I miss tinder. if I got a text like this after hooking up with a tinder date for the purposes of having sex, I could think of a couple of legitimate reasons why she would want to know, for example if she wants to know whether to get tested for STD's, or if she needs to take some birth control pill or check for pregnancy over the coming weeks. (She does say "if we fooled around", which unless it's a trick takes responsibility for what "we" (plural) did.)

Now I am too new to Red Pill to offer a way to do this but what do other people here think about my following suggested reply:

Are you okay? Do you have a boyfriend you didn't mention? You seemed to have fun / orgasm last night. if you're worried about std's or pregnancy or something feel free to call me to discuss what happened, I'm here for you - and it was nice meeting you. I hope it was a good experience.

but hey that's just me. Ideally get a text back from her 1) taking responsibility and 2) saying it was a good experience.

Notice that my suggested text does not answer her question directly. don't do that.

it's comfort game time. (in my opinion.)

chasebandz01 · 2018-04-16T23:10:49+00:00

the absolute state of western women. give this a shot pal. "wow i don't even know, maybe we should get together and try to fill in eachother's blanks :^)"

don't say anything over text besides that. if she doesn't go for it ignore it and start lawyer shopping. its best to be prepared.

juliusstreicher · 2018-04-18T13:27:45+00:00

That "just wanna make sure" surely sounds like a setup to me. The bad kind of setup.

DaftOdyssey · 2018-05-04T06:16:07+00:00

What happened? What did she say?

QuiteRandomDUDE · 2018-04-16T12:54:16+00:00

If this happened to me, I'd say Yeah, we fooled around. Wanna grab a drink/whatever later? To comfort her.

I wouldn't mention sex, especially via text, especially when she "doesn't remember"

This works ofc if you want to see her again.

[deleted] · 2018-04-16T02:40:49+00:00

Tell her we'll replay/retrace last night, and make plans

cl3537 · 2018-04-16T05:25:12+00:00

"I don't know if we had sex, but you were real good at ATM"

daisy_plum · 2018-04-16T02:40:28+00:00

Honestly

the_real_lunch_box · 2018-04-16T09:34:16+00:00

oh fuck. she can make this really bad for you. I would suggest you explain everything to her as it really happened. were there friends that saw that she was interested in you? Also, did you use a rubber?

Casd12 · 2018-04-16T11:42:53+00:00

Tell her that you were also abit drunk but you think you guys had sex

Title	How do I respond to girl who forgot we had sex last night?
Author	DaftOdyssey
Upvotes	71
Comments	102
Date	April 16, 2018 2:29 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/8ckb7t/how_do_i_respond_to_girl_who_forgot_we_had_sex/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-do-i-respond-to-girl-who-forgot-we-had-sex.671 https://theredarchive.com/post/671