The definition of frame I currently like best comes from /u/weakandsensitive; frame is simply how I view the world, or my worldview: my values, beliefs, missions, likes and dislikes, desires, and emotions. More precisely, frame is fully congruent expression of my worldview in every action, behavior, and word.
Put another way, frame is living fully and openly "in character" with my authentic self.
Developing frame
Career betas have repressed their own worldview into their subconscious in favor of adopting the worldviews of others, to avoid conflict, curry favor, and hopefully achieve their covert contracts. In every interaction they attempt to adopt and reflect the frame of the other person. They essentially put on a mask to hide their true selves so as to better reflect back what they think the other person wants to hear.
Phase One: Discovering your worldview
The first step for the recovering beta is to get out of the frame of others and to discover his own worldview. This is accomplished by STFUing, thereby giving himself the silent space in which to become conscious of his own true desires, emotions, beliefs, likes, and dislikes. This typically takes at least 6 months (and often much longer) for the career beta.
Edit: "What do you want?" is a frequent comment to the posts of these hapless betas, who have so deeply repressed their true selves that they find it difficult to answer. Start with this, career betas!
Phase Two: Expressing your own frame
Now that he has become aware of his own worldview, the recovering beta can start developing his own frame by openly expressing his own beliefs, desires, and emotions. This requires the courage to accept that others will not always agree with these values and will resist them and fight them at times. The career beta must learn to hold steadfastly to his frame and his boundaries even in the face of this resistance.
Here you must also become your own "mental point of origin." Your worldview is the only correct worldview. You must become entirely self-validating; the only opinion about you or your actions that matters is your own. As /u/weakandsensitive says, any criticism or opinion outside of your frame "is either interesting or amusing."
(This doesn't mean that you don't listen to the ideas and criticisms of others whom you respect or never change your worldview when you agree (else why are you even here?), but it means that others' criticisms are merely "data" to you and only affect your own opinions and emotions if, after evaluation, you agree with them.)
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, But make allowance for their doubting too; ... ... you’ll be a Man, my son!
Phase Three: Projecting your frame onto the world
Once our baby alpha learns to live within his own frame, it is now time to learn to project his frame through leadership onto the world. Through narrative, vision, charisma, and leadership, alpha leaders convince others to adopt their missions and worldview. Steve Jobs' "reality distortion field" is a famous example of this.
Misconceptions about frame
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Knowing only the experience of adopting others' frames as a mask to hide their true selves, career betas assume that frame is yet another mask or false persona to adopt in order to display alpha behavior, and to hide or shield their natural reactions and emotions. Often this mask is an extreme form of STFU, or they fake stoicism or outcome independence by behaving like an emotionless robot. This in fact goes in precisely the wrong direction; developing true frame ultimately requires stripping away the masks and filters to uncover and express the authentic you. (See The Book of Pook.)
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Masculine frame does not involve suppressing emotions; rather, it involves expressing emotions like a man, in subservience to your goals and when appropriately called for.
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Frame is not necessarily selfish. Most strong men protect, care for, and add value to their family and friends, and many have missions that serve others as well. Desmond Doss's and Mother Theresa's frames were rock solid, for example.
Edit: typos.
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