This is a public service announcement.
Odds are you're in the midst of a lockdown due to Covid-19.
You are not allowed to stop working out.
You are not allowed to stop tracking your food, fattie.
You are not allowed to stop showering.
You are not allowed to stop dressing appropriately, you lazy fucker.
You are not allowed to stop brushing your teeth.
You are not allowed to stop trimming your fingernails and toenails, and your nose hairs.
You are not allowed to stop shaving your balls.
You are not allowed to stop being the oak.
You are not allowed to lose all of the discipline you've gained.
You are not allowed to not have a damn plan for the pandemic, even now.
You are not allowed to stop preparing for the future.
You are not allowed to let the things you can't control control you.
You are not allowed to stop having fun and stop gaming your wife.
You are not allowed to stop fucking your wife because you're stressed.
What I'm saying is, you are not allowed to stop being attractive. You have to be attractive. Don't be unattractive. Even in a pandemic.
I got a few doctor friends. They are all saying that their patients are getting fat. Every. Single. Patient. And booze sales are up 55%. Gee, I wonder why.
"But... but... I'm stressed, Steel. I need some comfort food. I NEED that drink." Well boo fucking hoo, you weakass.
Just remember, the next time you reach for that cookie or beer or what have you, and think to yourself, man, I deserve this...
Yes, yes you do. You reap what you sow, after all. In fact, that's what got you into this mess, isn't it.
Now get back to work. Summer is right around the corner.
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