What if women treated jobs like they treat marriages and other long-term relationships?
89 upvotes | August 1, 2013 | by Whisper
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I'm not going to build my resume. The right company will come along in
the fullness of time, probably when I least expect it.

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I'm not going to look for a job, or read the ads. Companies should
come and find me.

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I'm not going to dress up or wear makeup for my interview... I want to
work with people who appreciate me for who I am, not my looks.

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Why should I have any job skills? Going out of my way to be useful to
my employer sounds oppressive. It's more important to find a
personality match, anyway.

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No matter who or what I am, I am some company's ideal employee.

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That last company I interviewed with had a problem with me having 27
jobs over the last 3 years. What a bunch of jerks. I want a company
that values my varied work experience.

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If this job doesn't work out, that's okay. I'll just quit and take
them to Professional Court and get an order for them to keep paying my
salary for the rest of my life.

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I'm not going to get a job until I'm older. There will be plenty of
time for career building after I've spent my twenties backpacking
around Europe.

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Established Fortune 500 companies that want to hire young workers are
creepy. It's much more sane to work for a garage startup that does
something cool.

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I used to work a whole bunch of short-term temp jobs for minimum wage.
But now I realize how foolish I was. I'm going to insist the next
company hire me as a senior manager and pay me six figures.

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How come everyone thinks that a company that hires thousands of new
employees every year must just be rich, but an employee that works for
a new company every month must not be able to hold a job? It's a
double standard!

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Companies should be impressed by my relationship skills, and want to
hire me!

 
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