Is this true? How’s THIS for a red-pill theory?
57 upvotes | December 29, 2018 | by CalmPassenger
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I received this comment on on the catholic subreddit and was wondering
what you all here would think of it. Is it true?

“First of all, marriage isn't about being happy.

It's about the continuance of society and the raising of children.
It's about reining in men's destructive, and women's seductive,
capacities , and channeling these into a well-ordered good.

There is no "one" - there is simply the one you choose to live with.
The whole idea of selecting your own mate is predicated on the idea
that dictating your preferences will somehow give you a greater chance
of happiness (read: satisfaction) than to live with someone to which
you were assigned, or who won you with some means related to skill or
power.

This is demonstrably false. I (and I'm sure most people) have often
been more pleased with things I wouldn't have chosen for myself (e.g.,
colors of clothes, flavors of foods) because of habit or errant
preference, only to discover via someone else's choice (gift) that
what I thought I liked or didn't like wasn't true at all.

The idea that you choose your way into a marriage, more often than not
(though admittedly not of necessity) leads to the idea that you can
also choose your way out of it. No, you can't. You can't trade it in
or get a refund. We've spent the better part of the past century
advertising 'try before you buy' and nothing got better - it got far,
far worse.

This is because everyone goes from trial to trial and never commits.
You want to try the other model, the next edition, glutting yourself
on 'new experiences' instead of taking what you have to the fullest.
The more serious and permanent a commitment, the more seriously you're
supposed to take it. You can research, think about it, ask advice, but
the deep dark secret of humanity is this: confirmation bias is real,
it's strong, and the only thing that it requires is for you to want it
to exist.

Yeah. The mere act of deciding that you're stuck with something puts
you into a continuous mode of post-hoc justification. You can
literally brainwash yourself into being satisfied with what you've
got. Of course, this can and often is an excuse to avoid
self-improvement, but this powerful weapon can be turned in any
direction.

What we did with divorce culture is take it out of the relationship
equation because we stopped expecting satiety from anyone. The
entirety of advertising is geared toward arousing jealousy and
dissatisfaction. We are obsessed with acquisition as a means of
feeling fulfilled. If you don't instill loyalty, honor, or duty into
anyone, if you don't reinforce their commitment with peer pressure and
societal expectation, more will fail than not, because no one minds if
they do. Just having a steady boyfriend or girlfriend for a year is
considered a great achievement these days.

If there's no limit to the test drive, if you never have to bring the
car back or sign a paper (or you can tear the paper up at will), who
the hell is going to lay out actual money for it??

They are getting fewer and fewer.

The bottom line is that God told the Church how to run things because
He made us and He knows exactly to what depths we'll sink if given
even an inch of rope. You see no problem in 'tiny' concessions that
look 'good' on the surface but they all add up to total destruction..

Do not look at marriage as if it is supposed to make you happy,
because once you decide how happy you're 'supposed' (read: expect) to
be, everything falling short of your yardstick is deemed inadequate
payment due, and then you feel slighted, which then justifies
stinginess on your part, and you have a vicious cycle of passive
aggressive vengeance that ends in misery for all. Pass that person on
to the next unwitting test driver; rinse and repeat.”

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Archived from https://theredarchive.com/post/71896