The Korean, the Paddle, and the Sore Ass [Storytime with Andy] Kill Your Inner Loser | May 13, 2020 | by Andy ------------------------- [Post image] NSFW: This article contains nude pics. DISCLAIMER: Everyone here is 18+. I have permission to upload every nude photo. Happy to remove pics/stories – contact me [https://killyourinnerloser.com/contact/]. Cover image by: Dainis Graveris [https://unsplash.com/@dainisgraveris]. I have a lot of fun going through some of my old sex stories from the last 4 years; they’re a great chance for me to see how far I’ve come and see what my headspace was like at the time. This one’s particularly interesting – especially all the stuff about being deeply unhappy with how small and non-muscular I was. Yep, we’re going to talk about _body image issues_. I originally posted this story on FEB 2019 on the _Good Looking Loser Forums_. As always, any parts in blue are direct quotes from the old post I initially wrote. ------------------------- [Post image] BANGED A CUTE KOREAN GIRL: [Post image] [Post image] Super easy lay; banged her within a couple hours of matching her on Tinder. Met her in public, walked around for a bit and really liked her (she’s super energetic and laughed at nearly everything I said). Sex was pretty decent – she made me cum in like 3 minutes, jesus. She kept screaming “Daddy, fuck me harder, I’m gonna cum!” No man can resist that onslaught. Here’s a vid of me belting her ass, which she _really_ liked: She actually got really turned on when I told her I wanted to video it; some girls are really into the idea of being filmed/doing photos with you [https://killyourinnerloser.com/how-to-take-nude-pics-of-girls/]. She got even more turned on when I asked her if I could show it to my mates. What a little exhibitionist. In other news, with my fat loss/muscle-building efforts: HAD A HUGE FUCKING BREAK DOWN LAST WEEK, haven’t posted about it because I was processing everything. I can relate to “bigorexia” [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muscle_dysmorphia] – I have absolutely hated my body for the last 2-3 years (the entire time I’ve been on GLL). It’s a massive point of insecurity for me, and recently I’ve realised that despite getting stronger and adding muscle, I’m no more happy than I was when I could only deadlift 40kg (I can deadlift more now). I feel like I’ll never be “big enough”. So despite all that progress, I don’t feel any better about my strength/body; in fact, I hate my body more and more as time goes on. So I’m chilling out for a bit, focusing on learning to like my body, and slowly cutting down to a place where I have abs. I like my body when I’m skinny, the issue is I hate it when I bulk and look chubby. So I’ll lean out and then *slowly* lean bulk from there, making sure I never get fat and never dislike my body again. It fucking sucks hating your own body – you’re stuck in your body, so you need to get to a place where you’re happy with it. Bulking (and getting fat) hasn’t ever made me happy. [Post image] ------------------------- TOYS USED: _(These are all affiliate links)._ * BDSM Starter Kit [http://shrsl.com/2bt6r] (everything you need to get started with BDSM/kinky sex) ------------------------- What’s most interesting to me now as I look back on this old story (it’s MAY 2020 as I write this now) is the last couple of paragraphs – the stuff about being deeply unhappy with my body. To be honest, my body has always been my “sticking point” – the one thing I’ve taken the longest time to get to a level I’m really happy with. Sure, I lost 77lbs [https://kyil-extra.com/how-i-lost-weight/] fairly easily (in about 9 months), but I’ve spent about 5 years or so hovering somewhere around “skinny-fat”. For a huge portion of my getting laid journey I looked like this: [Post image] [https://i2.wp.com/killyourinnerloser.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/2018-10-13.jpg?ssl=1] Hardly a sexy boy. It’s taken me a long, long, long time to give myself _permission_ to actually work on my body; I had a strong sense of hopelessness [https://killyourinnerloser.com/hopeless-and-helpless/] when it came to ever looking really good. To be fair I’ve made _slow_ progress over the last 4-5 years so it’s not like I’ve been spinning my wheels… but at no point have I gone _all-in_. I guess it comes from high school – I was always the tall, skinny, “lanky” kid with no muscle whatsoever. I was never strong, I was never all that athletic; I used my head more than my body/hands. Years and years spent on the computer playing games, jerking off to porn and completely ignoring fitness instilled a really strong habit and self-belief that I could _never_ be anything but skinny, or skinny-fat, or even just fat. Certainly never _muscular_. Fuck that though. I’ve been seeing a weightlifting coach for a couple years, and he’s made me strong – infinitely stronger than I ever thought possible. 175kg deadlift (I started at 40kg), so I’m no slouch. And I’ve lost fat – tonnes of fat. You can see my abs these days, which was always just a pipe dream to me. I’m getting better, day by day, week by week, and though progress is slow [https://killyourinnerloser.com/progress/], I know I’ll get there eventually. Here’s the most recent pic I took in May 2020: [Post image] Certainly not elite, but a _hell_ of a long way from where I started. Most importantly of all, I NO LONGER HATE MY BODY. This is the first time I’ve _ever_ been able to say that in my entire life – I’ve always been so self-conscious I couldn’t even take my shirt off at the beach, lest anyone see how I looked. Even having sex with girls used to make me worry, “What if she hates my body?” So _not hating_ the way I look is still pretty novel for me, even though it’s been about a year now. I know that even if my progress is slow, even if my mental blocks keep pulling me down and telling me, “I’ll never get there” – fuck that shit. Just like everything else I’ve done, I’ll become elite-looking _as long as I never quit._ And trust me, I AIN’T NO QUITTER. I’m telling you all this because I want to point out to you WE ALL HAVE HOPELESSNESS/LIMITING BELIEFS; it’s not just you. There’s a tonne of shit I’m fearful of, doubtful about [https://killyourinnerloser.com/doubt/], unsure if I’ll be able to achieve. You have to feel that hopelessness/fear, embrace it and say “Fuck it. I’ll do it anyway.” If I can do it, _you sure as hell can too._ ------------------------- [Yo, Andy here. I’m an Aussie guy who went from a depressed, suicidal loser to a guy who gets laid regularly, has 3somes & BDSM sex, crushes weights at the gym & loves his life. I killed my inner loser. It's my mission to get you to kill your inner loser too.] [https://killyourinnerloser.com/my-transformation/] ------------------------- Archived from https://theredarchive.com/blog/Kill-Your-Inner-Loser/the-korean-the-paddle-and-the-sore-ass-storytime.34232