The Importance of Variety in Your Appearance 
The Rules Revisited | June 30, 2014 | by Andrew
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 There is a girl in my office that is extremely attractive. She is
good-looking, but she is much more than that. She has great posture
[http://therulesrevisited.blogspot.com/2012/01/posture-and-attractiveness.html],
always fixes her hair well
[http://therulesrevisited.blogspot.com/2012/03/importance-of-hair.html],
smiles frequently, is confident, and she generally radiates an air of
femininity
[http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2012/08/femininity-authenticity-and_5.html]
that is painfully lacking in many girls’ demeanor.

One thing that always stands out about this girl is the way that she
dresses – specifically, the variety of clothes she wears. Every day
she wears something completely different. In fact, I don’t think I
have ever seen her wearing the same thing twice. I am not making a
statement about the quantity of outfits she owns or the size of her
wardrobe; I know plenty of girls who wear different outfits every day
but still look boring. This girl actually looks different every day.
One day she will be wearing jeans
[http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2014/02/there-is-nothing-modest-about-loose.html]
and a blouse, the next day she will be wearing a long, close-fitting
dress, the next day cotton dress-pants with a loose, flowing top, and
the day after that a pencil skirt. I've seen this girl wear clothes
and dress types that I didn't even know existed. I realize that might
not be saying much coming from a guy, but the point is that she is
very clearly an outlier relative to other girls when it comes to the
variety of clothes she wears.

It would be hard to underestimate how much men love this – and I say
that with confidence because I've talked about it with several other
guys and they agree categorically. Her daily choice of clothes is the
topic of our lunch conversation more often than is probably healthy.
It’s worth pointing out that this attention isn't the wrong kind of
attention
[http://therulesrevisited.blogspot.com/2011/09/wrong-kind-of-attention_11.html].
Plenty of girls could work their way into our conversation by wearing
short dresses, small tops or tight skirts
[http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2012/08/how-to-get-right-kind-of-attention.html].
In fact, plenty do, and we talk about them too. But we come back to
this girl way more than the others because we are constantly surprised
and impressed with the variety. It’s hugely refreshing to see her
every day in a different outfit.

While I am sure that women can appreciate variety in male fashion
also, I am convinced that this is something men appreciate much more
than women. I've explained before how strongly men crave sexual
variety
[http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2012/06/men-and-sexual-variety.html],
and I've explained the importance of visual stimulation
[http://therulesrevisited.blogspot.com/2011/08/how-to-look-good-during-sex.html].
By varying her appearance, a woman appeals to both of those masculine
desires. Of course she can’t actually be someone else; but by
looking different every day, she can come close enough. I don’t have
a huge amount of evidence to support that claim, but when I think
about how tempted I would be to cheat on the girl I am describing
versus other girls that are equally attractive, there isn't much of a
competition.

Having thought about it a bit recently, I can break down this girl’s
fashion success into three factors:

 	* SHE TAKES RISKS
[http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2013/02/the-importance-of-taking-fashion-risks.html].
This girl doesn't always look good. In fact, I've seen her look
downright horrible at times. One day she came in wearing these shitty
gypsy-looking baggy pants and an ugly shirt, and I almost cried. A
couple times she's worn colors that washed her out completely
[http://therulesrevisited.blogspot.com/2011/10/your-skin-color-matters.html].
I’d say that roughly 5-10 % of the time, she looks bad. But I
realize that no one can pull off the kind of variety I am advocating
without fucking up occasionally; besides, the variety and successes
are both well-worth the mistakes. In fact, I would even be fine with
more mistakes if it meant I’d get a girl who was equally dynamic in
her wardrobe.
 	* SHE DOESN'T PAY ATTENTION TO OFFICE FASHION NORMS. In other
words, she doesn't think “this is a professional environment; a sun
dress is inappropriate.” She might not always be wearing clothes
that are “appropriate,” in the sense that they play down or divert
attention from her looks, but neither is she dressing overly sexy or
provocatively. Trying to bring women into the workplace and expecting
them to dress like men is about as ridiculous as asking men to stay
home with the kids and forcing them to dress like women. Women need to
be allowed to be women
[http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2013/09/on-being-typical-girl.html],
and “appropriate” has unfortunately been defined largely by a
society that doesn't fully understand that.
 	* SHE ENJOYS LOOKING GOOD. There is no way that a girl will be able
to force herself to dress in such a varied manner if she doesn't enjoy
doing it. And although you shouldn't try to force yourself to enjoy
it, you can let yourself enjoy it to whatever degree you naturally do.
I said a lot about this in the post Femininity, Authenticity and
Compatibility
[http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2012/08/femininity-authenticity-and_5.html],
so I won’t repeat myself here; but I want to make one additional
point in that regard: you don’t need to be a supermodel to enjoy
looking great, and you don’t even need to be hot for men to
appreciate how you dress. Let yourself enjoy looking your best in as
many ways as possible.

 Of course, these principles apply to make-up
[http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2012/05/how-to-avoid-looking-fake.html]
and hair
[http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2012/03/improve-your-hair.html] also.
The important principle is appearance variety, not just wardrobe
variety - but you can draw the analogies.

For the record, I recognize that having a wide variety of clothes can
be expensive. And I am not going to pretend that women with less
income are without a disadvantage here. That's life. If it helps
stomach that fact, you can remind yourself that wealth disparities
affect men in their dating lives far more than they affect women. But
anyway there are plenty of ways to work the concept of variety into
your wardrobe without breaking your bank, and there are plenty of
girls reading this post right now who spend all kinds of money on
wardrobes bigger and more boring than this girl’s. Make the most
with what you have.

Now, all this being said, there is some value in the adage “looking
good every day is more important than looking different every day.”
While I suspect this statement was popularized more more with men’s
fashion in mind than women’s, I also want to make it clear that I am
not advocating wearing ugly clothes or crazy make-up only for the sake
of variety. You need to indulge in variety wisely, choosing colors and
cuts that look good on you. But within the limits of what you know
suspect
[http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2013/02/the-importance-of-taking-fashion-risks.html]
makes you look good, don’t be intimidated by the pressures of
“what is acceptable” or what feels safe at the expense of what is
different. Different counts for a lot.

RELATED POSTS:
1. The Most Important Time to Dress Well
[http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2012/12/the-most-important-time-to-dress-well.html]
2. Feminine Beauty is Highly Controllable
[http://therulesrevisited.blogspot.com/2011/09/feminine-beauty-is-highly-controllable.html]
3. Men and Sexual Variety
[http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2012/06/men-and-sexual-variety.html]
4. The Importance of Taking Fashion Risks
[http://www.therulesrevisited.com/2013/02/the-importance-of-taking-fashion-risks.html]

 
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