| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 2 | Visiting in-laws for Christmas. | 3legsbetter | /r/askMRP | 07/11/18 09:53 AM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 3 | Own Your Shit Weekly - April 09, 2019Good man. I mean it is a big deal: remember your DB posts? But still. Really stoked for you man. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 10/04/19 11:26 PM |
| 4 | Own Your Shit Weekly - April 09, 2019Gotta admit my heart sank reading about your continued non progress on the body recomp, only to rebound a few lines later. Congratulations man, that's a huge milestone for you! Promise yourself you won't make a big song and dance about it. Remember to be the guy who's sex life is no big deal. I'll give you a break this week on the physique. Cut by all means, but get it done. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 10/04/19 06:28 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - March 19, 2019OYS #14 [ prev | first ] Age 34, wife 32. Married 7, one kid 2. Haven't posted for a while. Quick update. Lifting Stats: 176cm, 78.0kg Numbers: resting. I took two weeks off lifting due to time constraints, then a conference taking me out of town last week. Weight is fluctuating a bit, I'm not really cutting or bulking at the moment. Need to dial that back in. Back in the gym this week, on track to hit my usual four sessions. A couple of weeks ago I swapped out back squats for front squats, and … | /r/MarriedRedPill | 20/03/19 03:53 AM |
| 1 | When i say No the boss Stonewalls mei have these trophies in my desk till this day. I really want to believe this Persaeus. Made my morning. | /r/askMRP | 19/03/19 06:01 AM |
| 2 | [FR] Careful how (and if ever) let your wife take lead in bed.. Major shit test can ensue- OP may never recoverIsn't this just a variation on ASD? She got drunk and did some stuff she doesn't want to take responsibility for, so she's externalising and trying to hamster that it's his fault. Man there are a lot of comments. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 12/02/19 02:20 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - February 05, 2019I doubt you're wasting time, that's your hamster talking. 4-day GZCLP is awesome. At your level, the extra volume from T2 and T3 will be great, don't overthink it. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 08/02/19 10:53 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - February 05, 2019First workout is tonight! Awesome. This brings up another question I have: how do I respond to questions about my STFU'ing? Well I'm certainly the wrong guy to ask about that, but looks like /u/rocknrollchuck has your back. I'd only add that STFU is really used in two ways around here, in my opinion. (1) Don't talk about fight club, don't run to mommy every time you learn something new, don't run ideas past her. Sounds easy, can be quite hard depending on how your relationship has run in the pas… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 08/02/19 10:29 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - February 05, 2019I also can't (don't want to) train on weekends. The M,T,Th,F schedule I put up above worked well for me. Are you worried about recovery? | /r/MarriedRedPill | 08/02/19 04:34 PM |
| 2 | Thoughts on the Betaization Process - Alpha Fucks, Beta Sucks and the need to cut down her ego.I'm so confused. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 08/02/19 12:35 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - February 05, 2019No worries, venting is fine. It's at least part of the point of this place, I think. I know what you mean about building attraction outside the bedroom. At the end of the day, you have to work with the materials at hand. But in that case, if sex can't be about animal passion, I would prefer it to be about laughing and cutting loose. Both have a place in my ideal sex life anyway. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 08/02/19 06:54 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019We should resist the urge to autistically oversimplify and quantify real human beings or their behaviors to absolute categories. Of course, but I'm trying to reconcile two different definitions of a descriptor, not any actual people. If this entire exchange has been an exercise in validating and defending your ego from the Dancing Monkey charge, your beta behavior with your wife is only the visible tip of the deep blue beta iceberg of your soul. Poetic! But no -- I have been enjoying hashing out… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 08/02/19 06:52 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - February 05, 2019I had to look up what HOA stood for -- you mean like a condo gym, right? My wife uses one of those. It's cute, but you can't seriously train in there. Make sure to get to a real gym. I personally don't see the need for an SSC gym, but then they probably don't have them out here. You can teach yourself the basic powerlifting movements with a bit of youtube, and you can film yourself and post videos online for a form check. Might want to use a different Reddit account for OPSEC purposes, of course… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 08/02/19 04:07 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - February 05, 2019Agree with /u/TemporaryPhilosopher here -- do daily weigh ins, chuck them in a spreadsheet or an app and look at a moving average. Some folks can't handle the variation in the daily value, but you sound technically inclined so the idea of basing your actions and feelings on the smoothed line rather than the fluctuating one shouldn't be too difficult to grasp. If that's not the case, by all means do weekly weigh ins. I really like tracking weight over any other metric because it's easy to get an … | /r/MarriedRedPill | 08/02/19 03:51 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019Sorry for the late response, had to think about this a bit more. Good shout on those external signs that indicate lack of frame rather than incongruence. In particular, the DEERing is a strong tell. I think we are at this point mainly arguing about what exactly counts as a Dancing Monkey, because I think we agree about basically all the rest. I'm coming to prefer your definition by the way, which maybe isn't surprising given how much longer you've been thinking about these things. So at this poi… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 08/02/19 03:22 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - February 05, 2019I've felt like this too, lately. Just wanted to reinforce that you're not alone here. Also sounds like up we're in the same place with talking during sex (thanks, /u/man_in_the_world)... I feel a lot of internal resistance to it that I'm pushing past. Keep on it! Another thing you might like to try: can you make her laugh during sex? This is something I've made work recently. I think of it as a bit of an ice breaker. Damages immersion of course but I figure it's worth it in the sense that it rei… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 08/02/19 02:46 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - February 05, 2019Regarding working out four days a week, that's no problem at all with GZCLP. This infographic did the rounds on the fitness subs recently, and it spells out a four day scheme. Here's a quick suggestion, based on how I trained for a few months at the start of last year: Monday: Squat T1, Bench T2, 1-2 T3 exercises. Tuesday: OHP T1, Deadlift T2, 1-2 T3 exercises. Thursday: Bench T1, Squat T2, 1-2 T3 exercises. Friday: Deadlift T1, OHP T2, 1-2 T3 exercises. Cody encourages mixing up the T2 movement… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 08/02/19 02:37 AM |
| 3 | Own Your Shit Weekly - February 05, 2019Huh. I wonder what my wife's kinks are? | /r/MarriedRedPill | 07/02/19 02:27 PM |
| 3 | Own Your Shit Weekly - February 05, 2019OYS #13 [ prev | first ] Age 34, wife 32. Married 7, one kid 2. 恭喜发财! Chinese/lunar new year, lots of fun and not much drama. Lifting & maintaining Stats: 176cm, 77.5kg Deadlift: 150 (5) Squat: 110kg (3) Bench: 75kg (8) OHP: 60kg (6) Weighted pull-up: +20kg (8) Switched up the format here slightly -- now including the weight for my primary work set, with reps in parentheses. As /u/hystericalbonding pointed out, this isn't a meet and nobody cares about Wilks. I figure if anybody cares about my PR… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 07/02/19 02:41 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 29, 2019Really bicep work? Yes indeed. Then again, I'd been a "no ma'am I'm not here for aesthetics, I just want to be strong and healthy" kind of guy for years and had totally skipped training them as some weird matter of principle. So there's a good chance mine were (are?) underdeveloped and that was a particular sticking point for me. Which high volume bench programmes? I wasn't thinking of any in particular, but I've noticed folks on the various lifting subs talking about them from them from time to… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 07/02/19 02:20 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 29, 2019Yeah, that's my sticking point too. In the past, what worked for me was weighted dips and bicep work (hammer curls). Have you tried any of those high volume bench-specific programmes? | /r/MarriedRedPill | 06/02/19 02:22 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 29, 2019Good tip on Contreras. I've been doing (unloaded) frog hip thrust as a glute activator before squats and deadlifts, and they've helped with some lower back tightness I was dealing with. Maybe I'll look at weighted ones. Where would you program these? | /r/MarriedRedPill | 01/02/19 06:05 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 29, 2019A 10 year plateau is not fine. Fair call out. I may have slightly exaggerated in my first OYS post: there has certainly been progress over that time, just not consistently. I've had a lot less fuckarounditis since finding MRP. Focus was initially fat loss, so high intensity was/is a strategy to maintain lifts on a cut. Longer term you're right: risk of injury, burn out etc. and I've certainly seen a bit of that over the years. But I'm really done with cutting as a lifestyle, if you know what I m… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 01/02/19 02:06 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 29, 2019Often work sets are near-max, for example bench was programmed as doubles: 6x2x90kg. I'll find a better way to present it for next week. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 31/01/19 11:27 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 29, 2019C'mon man... my bench is weak, but not that awful. 90kg = 198.4lbs. From my notes, I first put up 95kg (209.4lbs) singles in March last year. I've made a 100kg (220.5lb) double this year's bench goal. Any suggestions on how to progress it are very welcome. Only thing that's worked in the past has been adding a ton of volume on alternate bench days, so that's the plan currently. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 31/01/19 11:15 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 29, 2019I eventually need to set the boundary, or something, that I do not want to have another kid until our marriage is where I want it to be. Let me know if you (or anybody else) figures this one out. I'm in the same boat... we had been planning a second kid and should really be getting started by this point. Dangerous conversations to be contemplating. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 31/01/19 07:19 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 29, 2019Yeah, that sounds about right. I suppose the conflict would be over whether or not she would trust my folks with him. Mind you I don't think she would actually go that far, especially if forced to own the decision by telling them herself. I'm big on autonomous dad time. Just gets fuzzy when others get involved. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 31/01/19 07:02 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 29, 2019That looks like a good solution, thank you. I'm less focused on the quantitative at the moment and just going by the mirror. If (when) I get back into it I'll definitely look to get one of those. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 31/01/19 03:07 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 29, 2019This reads like a much more self-aware version of what goes on in my head. Welcome to the party man, hope you can act on what looks like a very well thought out assessment. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 30/01/19 07:38 AM |
| 3 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 29, 2019Upvote for daily weigh ins and sensible low-pass filtering. That's what I used to do when I was tracking it a bit more carefully. I'd say do the same with Navy Method. I had quite a bit of random noise on that measurement too... maybe I just suck at using a tape measure. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 30/01/19 07:36 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 29, 2019OYS #12 [ prev | first ] Age 34, wife 32. Married 7, one kid 2. A quiet week consolidating and resetting. My folks are visiting. Lifting & maintaining Stats: 176cm, 77kg Deadlift: 180 Squat: 110* Bench: 90 OHP: 70* Weighted pull-up: +20 Missed a workout last week. I hate it when that happens, and I have my schedule set up to give me as much flexibility in making up missed time as possible. Still, sometimes shit happens, and in this case I had some unavoidable tasks that kept me away from the gym… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 30/01/19 07:30 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 22, 2019Good question, and one I'm not sure I can answer. She has a very high-gain fight or flight response, so she gets very upset very quickly. I didn't put a whole lot of thought into my phrasing in that previous comment. What I mean is: I feel as though passing shit tests should be about me, not about her. So if I can do so in a way that communicates this, rather than generates drama, that would be preferable. Perhaps that sounds like I'm afraid of her emotions. I'll think about that some more. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 30/01/19 07:12 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019My impression is that the majority of Dancing Monkeys here avoid or minimize these aspects of MRP for fear of challenging or angering their wives. Interesting, I hadn't been so selective, so we could be working with slightly different definitions I think. Even so, as you say passing (or at least, changing your reaction to) shit tests is a legitimate "baby steps" component which both our definitions include. This fails because they have no frame, no self their wife can know and respect; Perhaps. … | /r/MarriedRedPill | 28/01/19 04:55 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 22, 2019Thanks for the perspective. My wife has suffered from anxiety in the past, so I am hoping to get mileage out of the passive dread techniques. Based on my recent unplanned DL10 episode I think this is going to be the only way to make it work (with this particular woman). To this end, I'm trying to pass shit tests without drama. Meaning without overtly disrespecting her, wherever possible. Imagining she's a stroppy teenager has been helpful here, though I don't have a ton of experience with teenag… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 28/01/19 04:42 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 22, 2019Good show of self contol I give myself a C on these. Would have been better to stop before opening my mouth, rather than half a sentence later. Seriously on one occasion I must have looked borderline autistic, I literally just started to speak and then stopped. Just don't waste your time trying to debate it. Interesting, I was under the impression that I didn't. But I can totally see how pointing out that we had already had sex might be seen as debating. Maybe you and /u/man_in_the_world are rig… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 25/01/19 11:16 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 22, 2019Yeah, I'll have to think a bit about how I want to handle these in the future. In this instance I why with AM because it was authentic. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 25/01/19 11:12 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019That's an intention-based read, I guess. What about another perspective? The Dancing Monkey's actions are designed to display high value, so they are designed to make him look as though he's his own judge, that he's a man with options, etc etc. The design is congruent with his internal world revolving around the wife. But the behaviours aren't. That's the part that's incongruent, to my mind. Those actions do not stack up with his intention, with the external symptom that he seems false or insinc… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 25/01/19 05:43 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 22, 2019Just dropping in a note on creatine -- you don't need to "load" it, and you shouldn't overthink. Just take some once a day, every day. However makes it easiest to comply -- I personally throw 5-10g creatine monohydrate into a glass, add just enough water to get it into suspension and knock it back in one. Then I take my other sups, right before bed. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 25/01/19 05:24 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019IMO, Dancing Monkey is driven by an internal reality in which the guy's mission is to get sex/respect/blowjobs/something he wants from his wife; his frame and point of origin is a reaction and adaptation to his wife's. That's an interesting take, which I hadn't previously considered. I think our definitions of the Dancing Monkey are very similar, but where I emphasised the change in external behaviour, you emphasise the lack of change of internal behaviour. I object to your definitions Really? W… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 25/01/19 04:32 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019A process indeed. Thanks man: this week's post a bit late and without much to report. Working on my internal world at the moment. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 25/01/19 04:12 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 22, 2019OYS #11 [ prev | first ] Age 34, wife 32. Married 7, one kid 2. A quiet week consolidating and resetting. My folks are visiting. Lifting & cutting Stats: 176cm, 77kg Deadlift: 170 Squat: 100* Bench: 90 OHP: 65 Weighted pull-up: +20 Not much progress this week. Lifted four times as usual, still working my squat back up (did a single at 120kg during my warmup which felt OK). Managed a 70kg OHP single in the same vein, but it was a bit shaky. Back out on the ocean (one morning this week and last we… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 25/01/19 04:10 AM |
| 1 | She Picked Out My ClothesHah, fair enough. Something to think about. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 22/01/19 02:00 PM |
| 3 | She Picked Out My ClothesYou vote for shirt stays? I've been on the fence about them for a while now. I imagine undressing with them on and it's like... socks and sandals territory. What do you think about the kind that are basically a second belt, with a button clip? | /r/MarriedRedPill | 22/01/19 07:55 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019being a single dad ain't the end. this attitude will hold you back some. I know, I know. But I really want to raise my boy in a stable two parent house if it's at all possible. Plus logistically if we separated I doubt she could stay out here -- she would struggle to get a visa and likely have to move home. I can't imagine keeping my boy away from his mom, so that would mean we all needed to go back. Not part of my mission right now. People focus here on what value a woman brings to the table. M… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 18/01/19 10:16 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019Found out she lied to me last night about why she was googling pizza. I'm aware this is seriously off topic, but what's the story here? I'm curious how pizza could be sinister... or is it just the she's lying about pointless little things now? | /r/MarriedRedPill | 18/01/19 06:42 AM |
| 1 | When the lightbulb goes off.Splitting hairs a bit my man. I don't disagree at all, I was just aiming to be concise. | /r/askMRP | 18/01/19 02:37 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019My sleep patterns are almost entirely dictated by my toddler unfortunately. So no way to objectively compare before/after supps unless I'm feeding them to him. That said, lately he's been great, so I score 7-8hrs a night with about 3hrs deep sleep sprinkled in. I think I wake pretty frequently, I just go back to sleep very easily. You could look at ZMA (or just zinc) -- I have friends who swear by it. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 18/01/19 01:46 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019Just want to tag on the end here: I'm currently taking DHEA at 100mg/day, and I pay very little for it (check iHerb, Amazon for 50mg caps). Cam is about right in that it's not a typical sup in that it's hormonally active. It's converted into T, but won't take you to superphysiological levels as it's a rate limiter. So you'll only see an increase if you were previously T deficient. I've noticed more frequent and harder morning wood since taking it. Be interesting to see what my test levels are at… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 17/01/19 10:43 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019Yeah, I believe it. Thing is, I didn't literally threaten to leave. I just stated that the way things were going, I would be leaving once our son had moved out. I may be misremembering but didn't you do something like that once? It's what I told her a year or so ago, and I think it's how I honestly feel right now. I'm not going anywhere while I've got kids in the house, but once that phase is over, who knows? Anyway, it's a fairly distant threat given my boy's age. The next day I DEERed to her t… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 17/01/19 10:28 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019Yeah, that's not far off. I did say it was a giant fuck-up, right? I'm guessing somewhere along the way the notion that you made her do it has been accepted as the primary contributor No, actually. She was pretty remorseful, but since I didn't make a big deal about it she never tried to play that card. I'm an idiot, I'm not a domestic abuse victim. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 17/01/19 10:09 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019The optimist in me would like to believe there's a way to bypass this phase. So putting aside my own hapless escapades for a minute, this is an interesting conversation to have. Obviously I'm a neophyte, but if you'll permit me some unearned philosophising... Nobody starts an MRP journey because everything is awesome. They arrive at this place while living in a reality they can't or don't want to tolerate any more (we're not having sex). Of course it turns out there are actually two realities at… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 17/01/19 07:37 AM |
| 3 | When the lightbulb goes off.I didn't just want to upvote this. I've struggled with the OP's question myself, and what finally sold me on the possibility of positive change was just this. Women are *extremely fickle.* Just think of all the times your wife has changed her stance on something without showing any sign of being cognisant of their contradiction. Why should your image be the one immutable thing in her life? | /r/askMRP | 17/01/19 04:05 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019Not quite. The timeline was: slap -> hysterical crying -> liberal application of beta reassurances To be clear, this wasn't some sort of "main event" where she was about to fall in line. At least, I really don't think so. This was an idiot accidentally* dropping DL10 without doing any of the necessary homework assignments. You seem to be focusing on the slap a bit more than I was to be honest. She was extremely apologetic about that the next morning, and I genuinely didn't really care. If she hi… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 17/01/19 02:48 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019Sure, that's one way to look at it. Here's what I think: internalising a prize mentality and breaking out of codependent validation habits takes time. The "monkey dance" is a necessary starting phase in the MRP journey, in which the acolyte "fakes it". It should be performed in parallel with a genuine effort to reposition yourself at the centre of your world, thereby "making it". But for a newbie I'm not sure it's either unexpected or undesirable. Obviously if a guy has been at this for six mont… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 17/01/19 12:14 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019Perhaps you were trying to restart sex with "date night", and you autistically thought that the same threat would work again? Certainly possible. I was right by the way: she hadn't noticed we had stopped. Good suggestions for future initiations, I'll work with that general theme. Haven't tried to initiate since the fight, I'll own that I'm slightly apprehensive about it. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 17/01/19 12:04 AM |
| 0 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019"But I am telling you straight out, if you ever hit me again, we're done. I will walk out and start the divorce process the next day." Never state a preference as a boundary, right? It would be different if she had punched me, or if it had been in front of my kid. But I think I can let open palm strikes pass. She was very contrite the next morning, acknowledged she had crossed a line and apologised. I accepted and I'm not going to bring it up again. [Edit: unless it's to tease her about it.] Tha… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 17/01/19 12:01 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019It certainly was. I was surprised how calm I was by contrast actually, that display would have terrified me a year ago. I was watching for signs of manipulation but I don't buy it. She actually made herself a little sick at one point. I love your optimism, but I'm not sure this can be cast in an positive way. At best, as you say below, she has come closer to internalising that I might leave one day. I was careful with my language and never actually walked that one back (though I softened and cla… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 16/01/19 11:52 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019So it goes my man. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 16/01/19 12:35 PM |
| 6 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019I’ve often questioned posters on the origin of their relationship. Many (most eloquently, White-Trash-Killer) have stated that if your wife purposefully settled for a beta, then that is what she bought and what you will forever be in HER eyes. Although I abhor the words forever, zero, and never; I largely share this sentiment. Given the fickle nature of a woman’s feels, I do not buy into the “forever” part. However, you will have to destroy that guy she married in both yours and her mind. Really… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 16/01/19 03:35 AM |
| 3 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 15, 2019OYS #10 [ prev | first ] Age 34, wife 32. Married 7, one kid 2. Epic failure to STFU, leading back to square one. Fuck me what a week. Lifting & cutting Stats: 176cm, 77kg Deadlift: 170 Squat: 90* Bench: 90 OHP: 65 Weighted pull-up: +20 Started adding weight to my high-rep pull up sets. Yesterday saw +5kgx15, +2.5kgx15 and +0kgx15. Really enjoying these. Adding even a little weight forces the form to become more strict and it's a hell of a pump. Weight is still dropping slowly. Been relaxing my … | /r/MarriedRedPill | 16/01/19 03:12 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 08, 2019On-point, and honestly what I was expecting (or even hoping for). Thanks man. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 16/01/19 02:24 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 08, 2019what did she say? Background: we were friends for a year or so before we got together. I was a PhD candidate, she moved into a shared house where I had friends. Can't recall all of it but two key statements: "if you'd told me when we met that we'd be married one day I'd have laughed at you", "I had never known any geeks like you guys before, didn't know what to make of you" and so on. She spent that year alternating between fucking a couple of other guys, one of whom was about as alpha as I've e… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 12/01/19 06:07 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 08, 2019Interesting, thanks for the reminder. We never actually stopped our date night schedule... as far as I can tell she still thinks it's on. But I find my initiations on Friday night get about a 0% conversion, and I do better on any other day. Helped my sanity to just tell myself that experiment was over and not have any expectations of the "scheduled" evenings. The non starfish sex happened twice in April, I think the last two weeks before she went away. I think what made the difference back then … | /r/MarriedRedPill | 12/01/19 05:20 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 08, 2019Never in the one sided manner the scenario describes, no. Any enthusiastic animal action I've been involved with in the past was always with the woman's willing and active participation. Can't recall any with my wife though. I'm struggling to recall details of some of our early years, so it may have happened in there somewhere. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 12/01/19 05:03 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 08, 2019My man, you have the patience of a saint. Fun sex, eh? I think really, I'm looking for engagement from my partner. The stuff you mention in the "intimacy" section. To be more specific and off the top of my head: I don't want to fuck a doll, so I want her to be moving, at least some of the time. I want to see and hear her pleasure, but I don't care if I'm the one causing it or if she's in her own world. I want to be surprised occasionally, or to see her surprise on her face. I like variety. I wan… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 11/01/19 12:31 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 08, 2019Interesting point re: responsive desire. That's certainly one way to look at it. I had of course read your discussion with /u/resolutions316 in his last OYS, and while I don't identify too closely with the guy the "relationship" section of that post could have been written by me. With the slight difference that he was actually getting laid fairly regularly -- I'm still on 2-3/month. I do appreciate your input, but at this stage I don't think you have quite the right read. I'm feeling run down an… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 11/01/19 08:35 AM |
| 1 | "Permission" or "Order" to do what you were going to do anywayI am stealing this line next chance I get. | /r/askMRP | 11/01/19 03:06 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 08, 2019As always, thanks for your input man. Let go of your bullshit neediness for Attraction Validation. It's your turn now; quit overthinking and just enjoy it. I had considered this angle, but I don't think that's it. Female desire is a prerequisite for good sex, and I just can't see a way around that. I love the stoic angle but honestly it just comes off as bravado. are their orgasms any better than yours? If sex is just about orgasms, then why bother? I can do that by myself in the shower for far … | /r/MarriedRedPill | 11/01/19 02:02 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 08, 2019Thanks WAS, that's more helpful than you might think. Longer term maybe, but still useful. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 11/01/19 01:48 AM |
| 3 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 08, 2019OYS #9 [ prev | first ] Age 34, wife 32. Married 7, one kid 2. Short, late OYS this week. Could be considered a measured victim puke. Lifting & cutting Stats: 176cm, 77kg Deadlift: 170 Squat: 80* Bench: 90 OHP: 65 Weighted pull-up: +20 My squat has been really pissing me off lately, decided to cut waaay back and see if I can grease the gears a bit by doing a load of very sharp sets at light weights. Plan is to ramp back up by 10kg a week and see if I can find my mojo again. Started rowing on an … | /r/MarriedRedPill | 10/01/19 03:00 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 01, 2019I'm getting the feeling it might be helpful in integrating these MRP ideas into your personality -- leading us to the "why" rather than just supplying the "how". I'll keep it in mind for when I finally finish the WISNIFG transcripts. ;) | /r/MarriedRedPill | 08/01/19 02:18 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 01, 2019Appreciate the excerpts -- I had actually read the second one before, though I can't remember where. WOTSM isn't just about sex. I didn't mean to give the impression I thought that. It's been tempting me for a while now because it sounds like it's not pitched like a "self help" book (see WISNIFG, NMMNG, MAP, MMSLP) and it's not "blog-form" either (looking at you, TRM). I'd actually never really read "self-help" stuff before finding MRP, and I can't say I love the format. That said I don't like l… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 08/01/19 02:14 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 01, 2019Thanks for your response man, I'm really glad that book worked out for you. It sounds like a great bit of reading to help bring it all together. You have however reconfirmed my suspicion that it's too advanced for me right now. ;) I'm still at the "getting nagged and disrespected constantly, very little sex" stage of the journey. At this point, in the sex arena I'm mainly concerned with making our occasional encounters fun for at least one of us, and TWOTSM sounds a little too high level to be i… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 07/01/19 04:37 AM |
| 3 | Really tough situation, unsure what to do, need guidance.I'm shocked, shocked I tell you. Why has nobody demanded this young man's height, weight and lifting numbers? | /r/askMRP | 05/01/19 03:53 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 01, 2019While every other fat fuck was sitting around be a lazy ass not doing anything but being on their phones (women included – not just dudes) I was up getting shit done. Dishes? Done already. Burgers for dinner everyone? How do you like them? Got ya. Done. I was being the mayor at a different house. Love it. I saw a bit of this too over Christmas, but with my wife's family it's her grandparents who we stay with (her parents are separated and have new partners and ongoing dramas). My grandmother-in-… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 04/01/19 10:12 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 01, 2019resented is the surface level emotion you're feeling. below it is fear of being inadequate. Shit, that's something to meditate on over the weekend. Thanks man, I've been struggling to get to the root of a pretty serious defect in my thinking/behaviour in this relationship and you may have just opened my eyes to the root cause. You can more or less ignore the rest of this reply I think, it's just me rambling. put a summary of your lifts in your OYS Stopped including them during my vacation break,… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 04/01/19 03:37 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 01, 2019Great point. He used to love it when he was smaller -- I think we did that from about 6 months. Decided he was scared of it a little before the 2-year mark. Working to get back there. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 04/01/19 02:56 AM |
| 3 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 01, 2019I wish I could find this comment/post where someone compares initiating sex too often to some dude asking you to play golf every day. Here you go my man. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 03/01/19 05:20 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 01, 2019in particular you feared resented your wife's judgement Small distinction here I think, as the judgement was a done deal at this point. But you're right, it was nothing more than silly egotistical behavior. It's especially annoying for me because I don't think I do much on this end of the spectrum. I suppose I know where I need to put the work in. let's review some basic parenting and physics 101. [...] Sure, but that's not what she was worried about. She has a habit of visualizing problems like… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 03/01/19 04:57 AM |
| 5 | Don't be me - I got cucked!I'm pretty new to this shit myself, but to my mind the surest way to win is to avoid playing. Ask yourself why you want to be in an LTR. Articulate your reasons, at least to yourself and be honest. Don't just do it because everybody else does, actually go into it deliberately with intention. Then if and only if an LTR aligns with your current and future goals... I think an ounce of prevention is going to be useful. Select your woman carefully, no idea how to do this. Once you're up and running, … | /r/MarriedRedPill | 02/01/19 06:39 AM |
| 13 | Don't be me - I got cucked!100 comments in less than 24hrs, mostly people shitting on the woman for being a hoe and comforting Billy Beta. What the hell /r/marriedredpill? | /r/MarriedRedPill | 02/01/19 04:55 AM |
| 3 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 01, 2019Also: start lifting immediately. You're 6'5", you could be a monster. Don't waste your time with kettlebells. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 02/01/19 03:55 AM |
| 3 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 01, 2019OYS #8 [ prev | first ] Age 34, wife 32. Married 7, one kid 2. Last few days of the Christmas trip, plus a bit of long haul travel. Very quiet. Lifting & cutting Managed one final gym session, for a total of five -- that's 2 per week during the trip. Beats my previous record of two trips in three weeks, something to work at improving next time. I paid (very little) to use a fancy BIA scale, mainly because I wanted an accurate weigh in. Result was 77.3kg (up about 1kg from pre-trip but within var… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 02/01/19 03:33 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 01, 2019Sounds like you're on the right track. At least with the new year everybody's dieting, you won't look out of place at work. ;) | /r/MarriedRedPill | 02/01/19 02:50 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 01, 2019I don't jiu-jitsu, but I guess it'll be similar to other fighting sports. Remember that's 155 dry, so you'll be against guys that have cut down a few lbs to make weight, and normally weigh slightly more. Usually at amateur levels you weigh in on the day, so your options for "last minute cutting" are restricted but I recall dehydrating, nailing diuretics and sweating a lot. Agree with FSN, you're aiming to be very very light. Why not cut to 160 then review every 5lbs? I can imagine 5lbs making a … | /r/MarriedRedPill | 01/01/19 11:44 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - January 01, 2019I no longer feel the weight of the world Strong progress man. I'll bet it feels good to write that. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 01/01/19 11:36 AM |
| 3 | Curious about general users nutrition paths.It's a hamster battle. This is a great way to phrase it. You can't get around thermodynamics, but there are a million competing ways to cut. You just need to do whatever it takes to see it through. | /r/askMRP | 29/12/18 05:44 PM |
| 1 | Curious about general users nutrition paths.I'm sure I saw a photo of you with abs. And a freaky grin. Right? | /r/askMRP | 29/12/18 05:43 PM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 25, 2018Great, then you know what to do. I will say, I sat between 18 and 22% for years, finally got my shit together to go lower back in October. The last few kgs made the biggest visible difference so far. I'm probably around 15-16% at the moment and can't wait to see what the next few weeks will bring. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 28/12/18 08:45 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 25, 2018I'll just chime in here to say: it doesn't need to be sustainable or even healthy. You just need to lose fat. So do whatever it takes, but get it done. No reason it should take more than a couple months. You've been with this woman for 9 years. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 27/12/18 09:08 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 25, 2018If you used NI and A&A, then you engaged. Period. Gotcha. Why did you want to escape? Because you don't have the Frame to handle this. Exactly. In this situation at home, if she wouldn't respect my desire to be left alone to get some sleep, I would remove myself from the situation. Hadn't actually thought of it as fleeing (despite even writing the word "escape"), that's something I'll need to meditate on. I am giving myself a little leeway while I'm very literally on her turf. As you say, I need… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 27/12/18 04:07 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 25, 2018"Cuddles ain't free, babe." Succinct. I'll use it verbatim next time. Thanks for the walking on eggshells link. I'd read it before but hadn't connected it to this particular event, useful perspective. I still think I remember reading something else though, wondering if it was in a BPP podcast. I'll have another look when I get some free time. She's never going to "just suddenly understand" because you explained it to her. I didn't really explain anything [edit to say, other than initially pointi… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 27/12/18 09:31 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 25, 2018Haha, sex would have been pretty impractical. Nevertheless I did actually initiate, at the start. She was pretty mad though and actively swiping my hands away. I was honestly half amused throughout, although it progressively got less funny as the night wore on. In my own home, I would have left the bed and gone to sit in the lounge, or something. But trip parameters dude. Not sure if you're familiar with smalltown UK houses but I didn't have many options. Couldn't have actually got out of bed wi… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 27/12/18 09:18 AM |
| 1 | Way of the superior man questionYou sound like a good candidate for mindfulness practice. I appreciate it's very fashionable right now, but don't write it off just because the kids do it. In particular, check out meditations that have you spending time "observing your thoughts" -- those might give you a good return on time invested. You should be able to find a million websites books and apps that will promise to talk you through it, I'm the wrong guy for those recommendations. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 26/12/18 07:54 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 25, 2018Just wanted to say I'm really interested to see where this one goes. There's usually more than one way to skin a cat. Have you given much thought to how being open about this stuff is going to play out down the road? | /r/MarriedRedPill | 26/12/18 06:27 PM |
| 3 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 25, 2018Brushing off the past 7 months of failure since I can't do anything about the past I can only work forward My man. I find there are literally two types of people in this world: those with this attitude, and those with the other attitude. I can't be fucked with the latter. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 26/12/18 06:21 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 25, 2018OYS #7 [ prev | first ] Age 34, wife 32. Married 7, one kid 2. A week of comfort tests and "shitty comfort tests". Trying to get out of my comfort zone. Ate a lot of mince pies. Lifting & cutting Two more gym sessions in, some solid bench work and a load more pull ups. I had a cold for the first half of the week and didn't run myself into the ground on deadlifts, in the interests of getting well again. Controlled holiday eating and boozing relatively well. Only another week to go and I'll be bac… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 26/12/18 06:16 PM |
| 2 | Cognitive DissonanceSounds legit. Luckily no kids at my gym, and not many dickheads either. | /r/askMRP | 23/12/18 08:51 PM |
| 1 | Cognitive DissonanceYeah I think I'd miss shooting the breeze with the gym bros if I built my own. Which of the 5/3/1 variants are you following, by the way? | /r/askMRP | 23/12/18 08:50 PM |
| 1 | Cognitive DissonanceAwesome gift. I envy you guys with space for this shit. | /r/askMRP | 23/12/18 03:14 PM |
| 1 | The night before ChristmasBeautiful. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 22/12/18 07:36 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 18, 2018Very early in our relationship I turned down an afternoon in her bed to go to a muay Thai class. She went nuts. It's one of the only times in my relationship history I can recall doing it right. Thanks man, very insightful. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 20/12/18 07:39 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 18, 2018Point taken, and I'm under no illusions re: cheat codes. But in the spirit of getting to work immediately, I am looking for the best way to "fake it" prior to the "make it". So I guess the way it's spun by the hamster would be down to her impression of you. Low value: successfully shut down thirsty guy, phew! High value: he was just messin', okay to relax. Nothing further to be done about it. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 20/12/18 07:08 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 18, 2018Interesting, I can see that's exactly how it would go down. How would you go about detraining? All I can think is to push OI and skip the butthurt, but that wouldn't necessarily communicate the lack of intention, as she would still see it as her successfully resisting no? | /r/MarriedRedPill | 20/12/18 06:56 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 18, 2018I'm in the UK right now. Can confirm. But honestly, even in the summer the sunlight never felt particularly strong. Check out this study on vitamin D deficiency in Singapore: an equatorial, sunny place. Apparently ~40% deficient. I don't think they controlled for lifestyle, so my guess is i the weather doesn't matter much if you spend your 9-5 indoors. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 20/12/18 06:06 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 18, 2018Food for thought, thanks man. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 19/12/18 08:47 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 18, 2018I see it like this, I have no problems with sensual physical closeness that doesnt lead to actual sex , but I find non-sexual physical closeness frustrating. With wife it's often like this, she closes herself up immediately as I escalate, even if I don't intend to fuck her at that point. She has to feel she is in total control at all times and is unable to let go with me. And then both sex and closeness becomes just awkward and stiff of course. Could have written that myself. I don't have any va… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 19/12/18 07:30 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 18, 2018Hmm, I was going to say "nope, definitely duty sex, no projecting" but I'm open to being wrong about this. Next time I'll try flirting back and see if I can escalate from there. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 19/12/18 06:35 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 18, 2018Thanks for checking in man. The advice on kino is appreciated. Good catch on that dancing monkey phrasing. While I'm certainly not doing these things for her benefit, I'm worryingly close to the dancing monkey nonetheless. Something I need to unpick. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 18/12/18 08:54 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 18, 2018OYS #6 [ prev | first ] Age 34, wife 32. Married 7, one kid 2. Travelling over Christmas as per this askMRP question. Hectic times, missed last week's post. Working on preserving frame. Lifting & cutting Damage limitation during the trip. I'm doing OK at avoiding eating everything in sight, though the unaccustomed cold wet weather and the piles of seasonal junk food all over the place makes it hard. I guess if it was easy everybody would look jacked. Visited the gym twice so far. They have a dec… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 18/12/18 03:54 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 04, 2018Exactly. Thanks man, appreciate it. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 08/12/18 02:38 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 04, 2018November. I've been on a ~2/month drip since June I think. October was completely dry. I feel like a faggot just writing that. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 08/12/18 02:35 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 04, 2018"I've got more than enough to eat at home!" On it. I also have the opportunity to be the man during transit, on the plane etc. She finds travelling very stressful, especially with a little kid in tow, so I handle all the logistics and make sure to run the show on the day as well. Only thing I know I need to work on: eliminating outward displays of irritation when trivial shit is going wrong. This is the key flaw in my early morning game too, and it usually flares up at some point during check in… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 07/12/18 07:18 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 04, 2018New house also provides endless opportunities to fix shit, so that's fun. Bad timing though. We're flying back to the UK next week to visit her folks over Christmas. Standard expat protocol, not really a "holiday" so much as an obligation to the older folks. I posted a question about that in the other sub a while ago -- my thinking has improved a bit since then but I still reckon it's going to be a shitstorm. Staying with her family, in her hometown, visiting her relatives and her friends. Her h… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 07/12/18 03:51 AM |
| 2 | Just realised that my wife makes absolutely no sense when she argues. What do you guys answer to "you hurt my feelings"?This is my new favourite Uncle Chad post. | /r/askMRP | 07/12/18 03:15 AM |
| 1 | A Unique SituationI don't have much to add here, except to point out a thesis advisor is a "situational alpha", about as extreme an example as you'll find. Of course that also means she's probably not about to branch swing, and won't keep it up after (if) she defends and graduates. Do with that what you will. I'd scuttle the ship. ASAP. Be thankful you don't have kids. Set better boundaries next time. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 07/12/18 03:07 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 04, 2018Oh my gym performance was awful. Like twice a week, high intensity low volume stuff very much in damage limitation mode. I also ate a lot as high calories can help with sleep deprivation, gained a few of the bad kilos. I just took that on the chin and got on with it. Hormones on the other hand, I have no idea. Are you worried about your T? I guess remember it's just a phase. It can be a really fucking long phase (18 months for me, but that's unusual). I kept reminding myself that at some point, … | /r/MarriedRedPill | 05/12/18 05:52 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 04, 2018Ah, newborns. I remember that phase well -- my boy was a terrible sleeper, and was still waking up 5+ times per night when he was 18 months. The way I handled it, was I did 90% of the night work. My wife was really bad at sleeping and did very poorly on low sleep. I figured I was just going to have to suck it up. I didn't do it for recognition, and I didn't do it for her (at least not directly). It just needed to be done. I rationalized that I had the capacity to work on little sleep and she did… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 05/12/18 03:43 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 04, 2018Great report, sounds like you are plain sailing. I'm right there with you re: wife "treating every little issue like a crisis" -- would you say laughing it off has generally been a good strategy for you (vs say, ignoring her)? Sounds like I need to get myself a new dining table. Ours is circular. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 05/12/18 03:15 AM |
| 6 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 04, 2018Second vote for intermittent fasting. It's the closest thing I've found to a magic weight loss pill. Bonus: you get to experience hunger pangs on and off throughout the day. Helps tune you in to your body, and teaches you that those sensations are transient. You're in control. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 05/12/18 03:12 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - December 04, 2018OYS #5 [ prev | first ] Age 34, wife 32. Married 7, one kid 2. House move completed, plus shark week. Lifting & cutting Stats: 176cm, 77kg Deadlift: 170kg Squat: 125kg Bench: 92.5kg OHP: 62.5kg Weighted pull-up: +20kg Missed a workout due to house moving. I hate missing workouts. I also broke one of my big toes moving so squats are off limits this week. On the other hand, weight loss is continuing. Aesthetically I'm in the best shape of my life -- can see most of my abs, vascularity improving an… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 05/12/18 03:08 AM |
| 4 | Initiate fool! Or "Passive dread and you."Now you will think I'm autistic but I'm trying to break her of this notion that remaining awake laying still next to me without touching is a way of initiating. I had no idea this was so common. SMH. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 04/12/18 02:47 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - November 27, 2018How is you acting like a bitch somehow her fault? You know what, I'll take that. Thanks for checking in. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 01/12/18 02:45 AM |
| 5 | [FR] Game and frameEdit: found it. An even more uncomfortable truth is that women's pluralistic sexual strategy is literally written into their genetics. In a woman's sexual peak, across her ovulatory cycle she will tend to seek out High-Testosterone cued Alpha Men to pursue for her short term breeding strategy during her pro-phase of ovulation. In her menstruation period her preferences switch to preferring the long term security of a docile, secure Beta provider, and thuse filters for those traits in her pair-bo… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 30/11/18 02:39 AM |
| 2 | Displays of high value (DHV) vs. displays of low value (DLV) in LTR or marriageThat rotator cuff's a gym bogeyman for sure. In my case I dropped the bar on my chest about a year ago and cracked a rib. It's taken me most of this year to get back over 200lbs, and I still don't lower the bar as assertively as I used to. The psych-out is brutal. | /r/askMRP | 30/11/18 02:32 AM |
| 1 | Displays of high value (DHV) vs. displays of low value (DLV) in LTR or marriageInteresting -- that's sort of what I thought OP was doing. I expanded a bit in another comment. | /r/askMRP | 30/11/18 02:28 AM |
| 1 | Displays of high value (DHV) vs. displays of low value (DLV) in LTR or marriageI do see your point, and I guess I was half making a comment about semantics. Douche move, I know I know. I take that in principle you can view any and all behaviour through the "display of value" lens, i.e. every action or behaviour is either signalling low value or high value. And there's certainly elegance and probably a lot of power in that perspective. In your reply, you've identified a theme of "competency" rather than "value", and I think you're arguing those are one and the same? Not nec… | /r/askMRP | 30/11/18 02:26 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - November 27, 2018It can take a lot of the wind out of her sails if you just learn to STFU. Don't respond. That's my MO lately, but damn does she make it hard. When these comments about your (lack of) sex life come up, just STFU. Again, that's the Plan. I don't always manage though -- obviously I can't literally be silent without looking like a sulking child, so I tend to go for short noncommittal replies. Things like "that's cool" and "whatever you say baby". Not sure how they're playing with the rodent but we h… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 30/11/18 02:02 AM |
| 1 | Displays of high value (DHV) vs. displays of low value (DLV) in LTR or marriageAs a total newbie to RP thinking, I struggle to see how these things can be neatly categorized as DHV and DLV. They read well as lists of successes and failures, but I don't make the connection you do. Surely a DHV is an action that indicates high fitness as a mate? So things like passing shit tests, conditioning availability or being preselected in front of your wife. Most of the things you've listed are just positive beta traits. Quite a few of them may well result in preselection I guess, but… | /r/askMRP | 29/11/18 07:17 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - November 27, 2018Sounds sensible to me. I'm also going through a weirdly stressful move at the moment, so honestly I'm not really motivated to initiate myself. Will try pulling back for a week or two and see how that goes. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 29/11/18 07:03 AM |
| 5 | Minimum age for OYS post on the main subTake that first paragraph over to OYS. Don't forget to add your lifting numbers. I wish that was my first OYS. | /r/askMRP | 29/11/18 02:35 AM |
| 2 | Leaving Things Half Done - Shit Test or Not?My family had a couple of pet cats growing up. Used to come downstairs in the morning to find all sorts of half-finished critters decorating the place. Lizards, mice, gerbils, and one time the head of what has to have been a pretty big hare. The cat-people narrative was always that these were gifts, or offerings. I wonder if my cats were compliance testing me? Anyway. Your wife is compliance testing you, for sure. | /r/askMRP | 29/11/18 02:33 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - November 27, 2018Love it. Although in the analogy, your golf buddy is initiating daily, right? I am getting repeated advice to do precisely that. Doesn't feel at all productive, at least in my context. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 29/11/18 02:24 AM |
| 6 | [FR] - The AffairThat escalated quickly. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 29/11/18 02:19 AM |
| 3 | This Holiday Season- A Public Service Announcement:Succinctly put. I see it this way too. Don't hate the player, hate the game? | /r/MarriedRedPill | 28/11/18 12:09 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - November 27, 2018Strong comes with a few built-in routines though I haven't tried them. They look boring but OK. I'm pretty sure you can download pre-made routines for the major programmes, and if not it's super simple to set up yourself. The biggest benefit I've seen from the app is the built-in rest timer. Sure you don't have to use it, but it's there ticking away just the same, reminding you to get your ass back to the barbell. | /r/MarriedRedPill | 28/11/18 07:42 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - November 27, 2018If your frame is stronger and dominant in your relationship, she will accept your view on this. I guess I know where I need to put the work in! | /r/MarriedRedPill | 28/11/18 07:34 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - November 27, 2018He told me that in his experience it is incredibly rare to see anyone with levels in the 5-600s. Assume (from your reference ranges) this is in ng/dL? If so I've been measured at around 600 for the past couple of years, and I'm a bit older than you. Nobody batted an eye. I haven't had treatment though. I think if I found myself on the low end, I'd be looking to jack up endogenous production before jumping to medication -- sounds like your doctor is of this mind too. If it weren't for the off-col… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 28/11/18 04:31 AM |
| 2 | Own Your Shit Weekly - November 27, 2018I've used LP in the past when coming back from injury, illness, cutting, whatever. It's pretty fun to get back to such a basic routine, second this advice. (I also like the Strong app mentioned in another comment.) | /r/MarriedRedPill | 28/11/18 04:16 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - November 27, 2018Nothing much to add to what the others wrote, but just wanted to mention I'm in a very similar boat re: kino, gaming wife etc. I've been throwing around the idea that maybe I shouldn't be gaming or kinoing her because maybe to her it just comes off as the old needy me that needs sex from her. I was wondering this last week. Interesting that /u/rocknrollchuck seems to support this in his response. With babies, there's this thing women talk about called being "touched out", where you've had this t… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 28/11/18 03:50 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - November 27, 2018OYS #4 [ prev | first ] Age 34, wife 32. Married 7, one kid 2. Working through stuff internally, not much drama to report. Reddit unblocked this account, so I'm switching back. I'll keep /u/3legsgood as an alt in case it happens again I guess. Lifting Stats: 176cm, 78kg Deadlift: 170kg (185kg 1RM) Squat: 125kg Bench: 92.5kg OHP: 62.5kg Weighted pull-up: +20kg Had the flu last week (again), fucked with my cut a bit. Felt stronger than usual on Friday so decided to have some fun with deadlifts, hi… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 28/11/18 03:25 AM |
| 6 | How I fucked up onlineYo /u/FoxShitNasty83 I've been following your OYS posts for a while, and I think this one's the best answer, if the shit goes down. Honestly this aMRP post reads as you having a bit of a panic attack. I give it 10:1 odds your housemate never finds out. Laugh about it with the tinder lass, continue gaming her or don't, your call. And I guess consider this a lesson in online OPSEC. | /r/askMRP | 28/11/18 02:21 AM |
| 1 | What are the tells that a woman might bait and switch sexually?I find the conscious/subconscious aspect of this fascinating, and would really like to see a discussion of how much (if any) of a woman's behaviour in this regard is subconscious (suspect the answer is "almost all", as frankly it would be for most men too). The flip side of this is that, as far as I can tell, their response to improvements in SMV should also be unconscious, right? Meaning even a particularly mean wife could very well be receptive -- it's not vehaviour that's determined conscious… | /r/askMRP | 12/11/18 10:33 PM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - November 06, 2018Thanks for the comment, I certainly plan to continue. Interesting suggestion on the pressure flip. It did occur to me, but I figured it would result in an argument about our sex life which we just didn't have the time for (on our way to another fucking apartment viewing). Plus it sounds a bit like an ultimatum, or would definitely have been received as one. On the other hand, I aspire to build a frame where that response could be delivered in a fun/teasing way, without blowing up all over the pl… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 08/11/18 06:36 AM |
| 1 | Visiting in-laws for Christmas.Thanks man, it's on the list. | /r/askMRP | 08/11/18 01:16 AM |
| 1 | Visiting in-laws for Christmas.Ah, point taken. I guess I should clarify: I lived in the same city for a few years a while ago -- there aren't many "sights", and the weather is awful in December. ;) I'll make time to get lunch with any old friends still in the area, but other than that I'm really not interested in doing much else. Perhaps this is a peculiar expat thing, but these trips are really not vacations, at least not in the sense that most folks use the word. Before we had my son, we would have taken a trip to the beac… | /r/askMRP | 07/11/18 02:11 PM |
| 1 | Visiting in-laws for Christmas.Thanks screech, always enjoy your pep talks. Already familiar with the local gym, and ditto on the other points. | /r/askMRP | 07/11/18 01:13 PM |
| 2 | Visiting in-laws for Christmas.This is solid general advice, I hope others reading this take it on board. I reckon even for a longer trip like ours I could operate a similar policy, perhaps broken down by day. | /r/askMRP | 07/11/18 01:07 PM |
| 2 | Visiting in-laws for Christmas.Haha, we'd be in on a beach in Bali instead. More seriously, I'm on board with a general theme of having him spend as much time with his extended family as possible. It's awesome watching him playing with his great grandparents for example, he loves them. Just looking to manage my image with the wife. | /r/askMRP | 07/11/18 01:05 PM |
| 1 | Visiting in-laws for Christmas.Good perspective, thank you. It is definitely natural that she should arrange her own family visits, so framing it as you suggest would fit well. I already game the family as a matter of course, thankfully. No intention of waiting until next year. | /r/askMRP | 07/11/18 01:02 PM |
| 1 | Visiting in-laws for Christmas.Very interesting homework suggestion, thank you. I'll work that in one day and see what happens. | /r/askMRP | 07/11/18 01:00 PM |
| 1 | Visiting in-laws for Christmas.Wow, I'll bet that took balls. I get a lot of fetch requests which I'm still figuring out how to deal with -- for now, the ratio isn't too bad so I'm complying when it's not too ridiculous and making sure I task her regularly too. I can see that scenario playing out identically in our family by the way. How long did the bitchy fallout last? | /r/askMRP | 07/11/18 12:59 PM |
| 1 | Telling me how to discipline kidsQuality suggestions here, bookmarked. My kid is too young for most of this to work, but I (along with OP, apparently) find the biggest challenges to my leadership seem to come from my wife's expectations re: interaction with my kids. | /r/askMRP | 07/11/18 04:18 AM |
| 1 | Own Your Shit Weekly - November 06, 2018Interesting -- you sound like a scientist to me (I am a scientist). We instinctively avoid making "absolute" statements: "X is the most important variable." This is because as you note, almost no blanket statement is going to satisfy a scientist's need for rigour. Non-scientists want "actionable insights", which to us can feel like being forced into a corner. In the small amount of consulting work I've done, I've found that when I'm pushed in this way, simply stating the boundary of the problem … | /r/MarriedRedPill | 07/11/18 03:49 AM |
| 5 | Own Your Shit Weekly - November 06, 2018OYS #1 Age 33, wife 32. Married 7, one kid 2. This post is your standard introduction babble, in the hope it can provide context for future posts. I'm hoping to focus future OYS on specific events from the week, and use them to set out my thoughts and generally solicit advice. In the spirit of not talking about fight club, I don't have any real-world space to discuss any of this stuff. Lifting I'm a metric guy, Freedom Units in parenthesis for this intro post. Weights are working sets, mix of tr… | /r/MarriedRedPill | 07/11/18 03:35 AM |
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